Pictures of You
by hopeevelyn
Summary: Abel wondered how all this had happened, just a little while ago, he had a scholarship to any college he wanted, the most incredible girlfriend, and a normal set of parents. And now? Now he was hunting down his biological parents - the Tellers - who were supposedly some type of motorcycle club members, his girlfriend was kidnapped, and he had no idea how to fix anything.
1. Chapter 1

"Babe you want anything?"

Abel looked away from his best friend and turned to look at his girlfriend who was holding her empty plate and holding out her hand for his own, with a smile he handed her his plate, and shook his head.

"Hey beautiful, I'll take a beer."

"Get it yourself asshole," He said kicking Nick's chair with his foot before Cassidy could say anything, because he knew her, she wouldn't say in anything, in fact she would actually go and get him a beer.

"Bro, not all of us can get a girl like Cassidy Somers, let me live vicariously through you."

"No," He said despite the fact that he was laughing.

"Cassidy, you beautiful, beautiful, girl," Nick grinned as he took the beer Cassidy had brought for him.

"You better not be drinking that," Abel said catching sight of the other beer left in her hand.

He hated how irrational he sounded, he wasn't Cassie's father, and he couldn't tell her what she could or could not do, but that didn't mean he could always bite his tongue. His girlfriend was the sweetest, purest, most untainted person he had ever met in his life, and the idea of anything changing that, drove him insane.

"I'm not," She smiled reassuringly, "I didn't know if you wanted a drink, so I just got one anyway."

"No I don't," He said taking the beer out of her hand and placing it on the table, "In fact, all I really want to do is take you home."

"Bro, this is your victory party, you have to stay," Nick cried getting up at the same time as he did.

Abel smirked as he pulled Cassidy into him, "I think I'm going to have my own victory party with this one."

Cassidy's eyes widened, a blush filling her rosy cheek, and she quickly buried her head into his chest. He would make up for that comment later, his best friend had been hitting on his girl all night, and while he was used to that, some days he made a point to put him back in his place, and stake his claim.

Jesus Christ, Cassidy Somers was turning him into a damn caveman.

"Come on pretty girl."

"We don't have to go," Cassidy said quietly as he pulled her out the door accepting the many congratulations on the way, "Abel your soccer team, the one you're the captain of, just won the entire state championship, there were scouts there. This is your party, this what you did, don't leave because of me."

"You stupid girl," Abel laughed picking her up by her waist causing her to wrap her arms around his neck as he carried her out Nick's house, "Why would you think there is anywhere I would want to be but with you?"

"I don't," She laughed back throwing her head back as he spun her around, "But just, don't sacrifice things for me-"

Abel pressed his lips against hers cutting of her bullshit, as he held gently placed her feet on the ground, pulling her body even closer to him, till there was absolutely no distance between their bodies.

"You're so freaking stupid."

"You have got to stop calling me that," Cassidy laughed despite the fact that she didn't actually care, considering that he had called her that for as long as they had known each other.

"It's my favorite insult," He smiled down at her, his eyes focusing on the neckline of her dress, god he loved when she wore dresses like that, they were just sexy enough to be beautiful, and cute enough to be Cassidy.

"Abel," She laughed as his lips moved down to kiss down her chest, "We are in the middle of Nick's driveway, and porno isn't my thing."

"You," He whispered moving up her neck, "Don't know that there is such a thing as porn. You're too innocent."

"What about sex? Do I know about that?"

"No," Abel smirked picking her up, her legs wrapping around his waist, as he placed her on the hood of the car, "But that, is something I wouldn't mind teaching you about."

"Can you at least teach me in the car?" She laughed as his kisses on her neck turned less heated and more playful.

"How about I teach you in my house? Much more classy."

"While your mom sleeps across the hall?"

"I said more classy babe, not actually classy."

"So let me get this straight, I'm allowed to have sex with you while your mom's across the hall," Cassidy raised her eyebrows playfully as she got into the car, "But I'm not allowed to say the word shit?"

"No," He said slamming his door shut once he got in, "You aren't allowed to say the word shit, but I might make an exception for the word 'fuck' just for tonight."

Cassidy stared at him for a second her mouth opened slightly before throwing her head back and laughing that laugh that made him want to kiss her so hard that he would forget that there was anything else in the world.

Probably because it felt like there was no one else in the world, when she laughed like that because of him.

"And if my legs decide not to open tonight?"

Abel leaned over and kissed her sweetly, "Then I'll claim my prize in the morning."

"It's always yours," She whispered before kissing him again.

"Speaking of my mother," Abel groaned pulling away from her as the phone vibrated in the cup holder, "Can you pick that up?"

"What?" Cassidy asked as he backed out of Nick's driveway, "Are you that scared of your mother?"

"The woman cooks my meals, do you want me to starve Cassie?"

"Point taken," Cassidy laughed picking up the phone and hitting the speaker button, "Hey Mrs. Petrie, we're on our way back right now."

"Cassidy, sweetheart?" His mother's voice came off shaky over the line and instantly made him worried, "Is Abel there?"

"Yes Mom, I'm right here." He said hoping he could reassure her from whatever was bothering her.

"Abel, there's a man here, and he wants to talk to you."

"What man?" He asked stepping on the gas harder, and cutting somebody off, only taking his eyes off the road for one brief second, before he took the phone from her hand.

"Hello Abel," A smooth Irish accent slid down the line as Cassidy turned to look at him with wide eyes, her hand clutching the arm rest. He handed his phone back to her before placing his now free hand on her thigh hoping to comfort her as much as himself.

Her hand just small enough to be completely covered in his own, but just big enough to fit perfectly into his.

"Who are you?"

"My name is Father Kellan Ashby, now your Ma here has been quite accommodating, and I'm going to need you to do the same."

"Or what?" He said in a controlled tone despite the fact that the anger was practically bleeding from his voice.

"Well there's no need to makes things violent, son, but how about you just do as you're told, and I'll make sure no harm comes to your Ma."

Abel scanned the area making sure he wouldn't hit anybody, and then he stretched his arm all the way across Cassidy's body, and completely floored it. When he was sure that she wasn't going to fly out of his windshield, he let go of her, and grabbed onto the steering wheel barely keeping control of the car.

"Take the next left."

Abel didn't even bother to question how the man knew where he was, he didn't have time to think about that, he didn't have time for anything, he took the next left, the car barely moving as he directed it to.

"Now take the next right."

This time Abel ignored the man's order, and instead stretched his arm out around Cassidy again before slamming the brakes on his car.

"Get out," He ordered to Cassidy pulling onto the side of the empty highway, "Get out, go home, don't call anyone, and don't talk to anybody. You go straight home, do you understand me?"

Cassidy stared at him for a brief moment her eyes wide and filled with the same panic that he was sure mirrored his own before she nodded, and reached for the door handle.

"Not so fast their love," The Irish accent filled the air, "I'm going to need you to join in on the festivities."

"She has nothing to do with this," Abel said harshly, "In fact, what the hell does my family have to do with anything?"

"Cassidy, it is Cassidy right? You need to sit back down, and put your seatbelt on. Abel, you need to take the next right," He said, "And that way your mother can sit right here, not a hair on her head hurt."

Abel slammed his hands on the steering wheel. What the fuck was happening?

He couldn't understand anything, at all. Why was this happening to him? What did this man want? With him? With his mom? With his girlfriend?

"Baby, you need to drive."

He turned to look at Cassidy who was buckled up, her body pressed into the seat, her hand clutching the door handle tightly, a determined look taking over her normally soft and gentle features, she wasn't getting out of this car even if he had the guts to try and make her do so.

He nodded his head slowly, for once taking a page out of his girlfriend's book instead of it being the other way around, fake it till you make it.

She smiled at him, for the first time that smile not reaching her eyes, and she held out her hand. He nodded again and took it, this time starting the car and moving it at a less murderess speed.

He clutched her hand tightly as he took the next right and pulled onto a stray dirt road that he wasn't sure even constituted as a road. He wasn't sure if he just had enough surprise or if there was some part of him that was expecting the sight of his mother standing there in front of her own car, a man pointing a gun to her head, and another man – this one older.

Okay, so maybe he hadn't quite been expecting the preacher, the whole 'Father' thing had kind of been swept over his head.

"Stay behind me," He said quietly as he got out of the car causing Cassidy to do the same, and pulling her gently behind him, and letting go of her hand, when her fingers grasped the back of his shirt, her head gently rested on the back of his shoulder.

Neither of them knew what was about to happen, but he had a pretty good idea that neither of them actually wanted to see it play out. He was more than happy to give her something to hide behind, especially considering, he was probably the reason she was in this mess.

"Hello Abel," Father Kellan smiled – which was surprisingly or unsurprisingly creepy, "Look at you son, you've grown up so much."

He ignored the man and looked at his mom who had a piece of duct tape stretched across her mouth, and bounded across her wrists, but otherwise she looked fine, "Are you alright?"

His mom nodded, her eyes wild as if she was trying to convey some sort of message to him that he had absolutely no hope of understanding whatsoever.

"Cassidy, sweetheart, come here."

"What do you want?" Abel said through gritted teeth as he grabbed Cassie's wrist as she moved to comply.

"Shoot his mother in the foot."

"No!" Cassidy screamed as they both lunged forward, "No! I'm coming see, I'm coming!"

She walked her forward her hands held up in surrender as she stared at him with wide eyes, "Abel's going to listen, right babe?"

He nodded slowly as Cassidy moved forward stopping right in front of his mother, her hands pulling his shaking mom into her arms, one hand wrapped around her shoulders, the other gently holding her head, shielding his mom away from whatever happened next.

The woman looked like she was about to have a heart attack.

"Tell me Abel," Father Kellan said, "Did you know you were adopted?"

Judging by the way his mother thrashed in Cassie's arms, this was what she was so worried about him finding out. If he had known that that had given his mom so many nightmares, he would've just told her that he knew.

It wasn't that big of a secret, despite the fact that his mom had blonde hair like him, he didn't look like anyone on either side of his family, not to mention that he had found his original birth certificate, or what was left of it anyway, everything but his first and middle name, and birth date and time was etched out.

It felt like Abel had known he was adopted for as long as he knew what the word meant. It had never bothered him, surprisingly it wasn't something that he didn't spent too much time thinking about, he was happy with his life, what more was there to it?

Obviously a whole hell of a lot more if that was what was coming to bite him in the ass.

"Yes."

"And do you know who you real parents are?"

"No."

"Jax Teller and Tara Knowles-Teller."

Abel blinked, "Is that supposed to mean something to me?"

It wasn't a spiteful question, it was truly a question, those names were just names to him, they didn't mean anything, nor did they hold any substance, he didn't think about anything when they heard those names, he barely even registered that they were living breathing people.

"No I suppose it shouldn't, but I promise you, your name means something to them."

Again, Abel wondered if that was supposed to mean something to him. They had given him up, for whatever their reasons, why should he care about the things they cared about, as far as he was concerned he was only having this conversation about his birth parents, to help his real parents.

For a brief moment, Abel thanked anyone who was listening for the fact that his dad was currently in Texas for business.

"Let the mother go," Father Ashby said without breaking eye contact with Abel.

He didn't look at his mother, as she quickly ran down the road her hands still bound, and her mouth still taped, he had no doubt in his mind that his mom was going for help. And by that same notion, he had no doubt that, Father Ashby knew that fact.

That meant whatever was happening, was going to happen now.

"Here."

Abel caught the crappy prepaid phone that the man threw at him purely out of instinct more than anything, and then raised his eyebrows as if to ask what the hell to do with it.

"Your folks live in a town called Charming, California. Very small, very off the grid. When you get there, you go to Teller-Morrow Automotive. You give this phone to your Da, and you tell him to call."

"And if I don't?"

"I don't think you understand me just yet son," Father Ashby took a step forward as the man with the gun placed the weapon firmly against Cassidy's temple, "This girl's life, is now in my hands. Every mistake you make, she faces the consequences."

"Let her go," Abel said loudly not daring to move, "She doesn't have to do with any of this, let her go, and I'll do whatever you ask."

"I need assurances of that, Abel," He said almost sadly, "Your old lady will give me the assurance that I need to let me know that when it comes to make the hard decisions, you will lean in my favor."

"Cassie," He said slowly, he didn't know what to do anymore, he was caught between a rock in a hard place, but by the way she was looking at him, he knew that she understood the situation very clearly.

There was no possible way either of them were getting out of this alive, not if they deviated from whatever script this man had playing out in his head even a little bit.

"I know," She nodded quietly, "I know."

"Get in your car Abel, and don't get back out till you're in Charming."

For the purpose of this story Tara and Kellan Ashby aren't dead.

Kellan becasue if Abel had stayed with his adopted parents, than he never would have died, setting the plot for this story.

And as for Tara? Well I'm in severe denial, and Tara is Tara, and she just does not die.


	2. Chapter 2

Abel stared blankly at the only slightly busy garage. He had been sitting there in some parking spot for what must have been at least an hour. He had driven cross-country in the space of twenty-four hours, and now that he had gotten here, he couldn't even bring himself to get out of the car.

He wasn't sure if he couldn't leave because he was too scared to meet his parents, or if he was too scared of leaving what was left of Cassie. He could see her everywhere – her sandals thrown into the backseat that she had never gotten to change into from her heels, her coffee mug sitting in the cup holder, the scuffs on the dashboard from where she constantly put her feet, and the lingering smell of her sweet perfume.

How the hell had this happened?

Just twenty-four hours ago, his life was perfect. He had a scholarship to any Ivy League college he wanted, his soccer team were national champions, he had a decent set of parents, and he was dating his favorite person in the entire world.

And now?

Now he had practically abandoned his mother, got his girlfriend kidnapped, and he couldn't even get his ass out of the car to meet the two people who had set all this in motion, the two people who had done this to him. The two people who effectively gave him life and ruined it in one go.

Abel sighed and then before he could put more thought into his actions, he got out of his car, and made his way towards the place where a bunch of men sat wearing some kind of leather vest that said 'Sons of Anarchy' on it.

He walked past them and moved inside the clubhouse despite the men's cries of protest, none of them were his father, he wasn't sure how he knew, he just did. He didn't even freeze when the men pulled guns on him, he was quickly becoming immune to the threat of them, he just surged forward till he caught sight of who he was looking for.

Abel looked just like him that was the only coherent thought he could form. Abel looked exactly like his dad. Same blonde hair. Same blue-grey eyes. Granted, Jax looked older than him, had hair longer than him, and wasn't clean shaven, but other than that, it was literally like someone had made a copy of Jax, and called him Abel.

For a brief moment, he wondered if that was even his real name, and then he shook the thought away, in the whole grand scheme of things, that was kind of irrelevant.

He wasn't sure what to say, or what is was he was supposed to feel staring at the man who was meant to be his dad, who in a different world would have been his dad, because the truth was, he didn't feel anything, but one single emotion, and that was longing.

He didn't feel anger at the sight of Jax, nor did he feel love. He didn't feel hatred nor did he feel like. He was plain and simply indifferent about the man who was standing in front of him.

All he could feel was longing for the beautiful blonde who had been laughing in his car, who's house he snuck into every morning because he didn't think there was anything sexier than her buttoning up his school shirt in nothing but her bra and panties, who wore t-shirts with his last name on it at every game cheering him on, all he wanted was to see her again, to make her laugh, to make her smile, hell, he even wanted to piss her off so badly that her nose scrunched up, and it took every amount of self-control in him not to kiss it.

He just wanted his girl, and his peace of mind, and his life back.

"Abel."

It wasn't a question, Jax knew exactly who he was and he wasn't sure if he was happy about that or not, but it almost sparked some type of feeling in him that was unrelated to Cassidy.

"Call your dog's off," He said as a form of reply.

Jax nodded at the men and the guns were immediately lowered before he nodded his head in the direction of two black leather double doors, and Abel followed him into what seemed like a makeshift conference room.

Abel waited for a moment, Jax was staring at him, and while it wasn't exactly the most comfortable of experiences, he let him, he waited as his eyes – identical to his own – searched him up and down as if looking for something.

He wouldn't begrudge the man that much.

"I'm not sure what to say."

"I'm here for a reason," Abel said sitting down on a chair and giving the gavel in front of him a weird look before turning back to Jax, "You don't have to say anything."

"Can you sit somewhere else?"

"What?" Abel looked at him, was this guy for real? That's what he wanted to say to him, sit somewhere else?

"Sorry," He said quickly, "Just that isn't exactly a seat I've ever pictured you or Thomas sitting in, and now that it's happening, I'd rather it didn't."

Abel rolled his eyes but got up and moved to the seat to the left, "Is this all good with you?"

Jax nodded as he took the seat Abel had vacated, and he couldn't help the sudden urge to get up and sit somewhere else, anywhere else, like all the way across the room. He didn't like the way Jax looked at him.

He looked at him like he knew him, like there wasn't a single secret Abel could keep from the man, and he almost wanted to spill all his dirty secrets to him, not that there were very many, for a second he wondered what it would have been like being raised by this man.

He figured he wouldn't have had any secrets from him, not by the way he was reading him like an open book, he probably wouldn't have gotten away with anything, but then again, he rode a motorcycle and carried a gun, he couldn't care that much for rules. The thought almost made him smile.

And then he forced the thought away as quickly as it came, he didn't give a damn about Jax, or anyone else here, all he wanted was Cassidy, and that was it.

"I have a girlfriend," He blurted out sounding like a complete idiot.

Jax half laughed, half smirked, "That's nice, buddy."

Abel wondered why the comment didn't make him feel like five year old, god is this what all adopted kids felt like when meeting their birth parents?

The man wasn't God, he didn't need to be impressed by everything he said or did, not everything needed to be overthought.

"Her name's Cassidy," He said her full name rolling off his tongue for the first time in a while, he had never called her anything other than 'Cassie, "And some dick named Father Kellan Ashby took her."

Jax's face lost all traces of humor as the color drained out of his face and he stared at him like he couldn't believe that those words had just come out of his mouth, "How do you know Father Kellan?"

"I don't," Abel said pulling out the prepaid from his back pocket, "But I'm assuming you do. So why don't you give your old friend a call, find out what he wants, so I get my girlfriend back, and we can go back to pretending the other doesn't exist?"

"Abel-" Jax said slowly as he picked up the phone.

He shook his head cutting him off, "This isn't a woe is me sob story, I'm not interested in why you gave me up, and I truly don't give a shit if you didn't want me, just make the phone call, that's the only thing I will ever ask of you, make the phone call and do whatever it takes to get my girl home."

Jax put the phone on speaker as he continued to stare at him like there was something he wanted to say, something he wanted to contradict, but honestly, Abel wasn't interest. The indifference was short lived and going away, he wanted Cassidy, he wanted to get the hell out of this stupid town, and he didn't want to listen to his father talk.

He just wanted everything to go back to normal.

"Jacks-"

"Where's the girl?" Jax said cutting the increasingly familiar Irish accent off with a harsh and biting tone that almost made Abel's anger deflate just the slightest bit.

"Now son, let's discuss things rationally."

"So tell me Father, where was rational when you kidnapped a girl? Where was rational when you threatened my son?" Jax's voice grew louder with each word he spoke till he was all but yelling.

Abel frowned for a second, his son, how weird was that? He truly was this man's son, he was a complete stranger yet they shared the same blood type, the same genes, the same face, they were familiar strangers.

"I assure you Jax, the girl has come to no harm."

"Prove it," Jax said enunciating the words, "Give her the phone."

"Abel?" A panicked tone but nevertheless familiar voice filled the room.

"Cassie," He cried feeling like all he wanted to do was lunge through the phone and grab her from wherever she was, "Are you alright? Are you okay?"

"I'm fine," She said quickly, "And you?"

"I'm fine," He repeated though he was pretty sure that wasn't the word to use for either of their situations, "I'm going to get you back, everything's going to be okay, babe."

"I know," She repeated the same words she had said to him last night, "I know."

"Good."

"I have to give the phone back, Abel."

"Don't be stupid, Cass," He warned though he wasn't all too sure what he was warning her about.

"I promise," Cassidy said quietly, "Hey Abel? I believe in you."

"There," Father Kellan took over the phone before Abel could respond to that, "The girl is fine, now Jax why don't we talk about the things you need to do for me to get her back?"

And then just like that all of Abel's indifference was truly gone, any bit of any remotely kind feeling for Jax was gone, as one thought and one emotion hit him like a bus.

This is his fault, this is Jax's fault.

And all he could feel knowing that was rage.


	3. Chapter 3

The first time Cassidy had ever stayed home alone, she was six. Her mom was out doing god knows what, and her dad was with his flame of the week. She remembered the way she had jumped when she heard the doorbell, and the careful stealth - or however much stealth a six year old could manage – with which she used to check the door.

She remembered the childish terror she felt when she realized she didn't know who was at the door, or why that person was there at her house. She remembered how she hid under her bed hoping that the person would leave sooner or later.

She felt the same panicked fear now, sitting in Mrs. Petrie's car that the Irishmen had stolen, with two of them sitting on either side of her, and two in the front seats. It was such an odd experience, Mrs. Petrie had driven Cassidy and Abel on their first date in this car, shoot Abel had taught her how to drive in this car, and now she was being held at gunpoint in it.

They had been driving for twelve hours, she knew because the only thing she had to do was stare at the green illuminated clock on the dashboard, well that and worry, and since the latter wasn't that appealing, she was stuck staring at the time.

It was true, time moved slower when you were conscious of it.

She nearly screamed in both relief and frustration when they pulled into some run down gas station off the side of the road they were on, they weren't even in Connecticut anymore, they had crossed state lines a while ago, but she still had no way of knowing where they were going.

For all she knew they were about to shoot her and ditch her body at the gas station.

Or maybe they'd dump gas all over her and then set her on fire, she had seen that in a movie once, it could be an interesting way to go. Painful, but interesting nonetheless.

God, Cassidy needed to get out of this car, she was going to go insane if she spent any longer in there, she couldn't let herself think about Abel, and she couldn't let herself think about the Petrie's, and she couldn't think about why all this was happening, so instead she was envisioning multitude scenarios that resulted in her death.

Completely normal.

"Get out."

Cassidy resisted the urge to scream 'hallelujah' as one of the men got out of the car, allowing room for her to exit the car next, and nearly fall from the unfamiliarity of putting weight on her legs after sitting in the same position for the past twelve hours.

"If you try anything stupid, love, I'm going to put a bullet in your knee cap."

And because that didn't sound particularly pleasant, Cassidy nodded and allowed herself to be led inside the gas station, with one man walking in front of her, and the other walking behind her.

"You have five minutes, after that we come inside. If I have to come inside, I shoot you."

She sighed as she stared at herself in the mirror, throwing away the used napkins into a cracked white wastebasket, before leaning against the door, and running her hands through her hair, her nails scratching at her scalp.

God, she looked like crap. Her makeup – that she usually didn't even bother putting on – was starting to smear, and if she hadn't fixed it as best as she could with water and paper towels, she would have ended up resembling a raccoon. Her eyes were watery and exhausted, and there were small bags under her eyes starting to form that hadn't been there before.

Not to mention her knees were killing her after being bent for so long, and it didn't help that she was still wearing her nude heels.

Cassidy closed her eyes as warm tears filled her tears, she wouldn't let them fall, she refused to. She had put so much thought into this outfit. From the perfectly messy ponytail to the backless black halter dress with perfectly placed silver gemstones. Everything was so perfectly thought out.

She never felt the need to dress up for Abel, she suspected that had something to do with the fact that somehow she always ended up in Abel's clothes, but Jenna Monroe had her eyes on Abel, and Cassidy could just tell, she was planning on going in for the kill at Nick's party, and god she had never been the jealous type, but there was something about that girl that made her skin crawl, and caused this completely irrational need to prove to her that Abel was hers.

Which by the way, was another completely irrational type of possessiveness that Jenna Monroe seemed to bring out in her. She had never so much as thought of Abel's as _hers, _like he was some type of possession till Jenna Monroe decided she wanted him.

She and Nick's new girlfriend – who Cassidy was only betting would last a month – had meticulously went through store after store till they had found that dress. It was just classy enough not to be slutty. And just slutty enough to keep Abel's eyes on her.

Which again, wasn't her saying that she didn't trust her boyfriend, it was just her putting a contingency plan in place.

It was almost laughable how ridiculous and irrelevant all that seemed now. Not even twenty-four hours ago she had been worried about girls trying to make moves on her boyfriend, and what she would wear to a party, and what college she was going to, and if she would ever freaking pass an econ test.

And now?

Now she was in a dirty bathroom in a dirty gas station, while two men waited outside the door for her, ready to put a bullet in her knee.

It was such an odd concept how your entire future could literally seem so irrelevant when you had to focus so completely on the present, how things you had spent sleepless nights over were the things you laughed at, it was all just so freaking irrelevant.

Cassidy blinked a few times before deciding against tying her hair back up, and opening the door to the bathroom only to be greeted with a gun to her forehead.

"Whoa," She said holding her hands up in surrender, that could not have been five minutes, and unless peeing had suddenly become 'doing something stupid' then as far as she could tell, she hadn't provoked this.

"Hello Cassidy, love."

She mentally grew all the more cautious as the Priest – who had been travelling in a different car than her – appeared, she had quickly learned that nothing good happened while this man was around, nothing good to her anyway.

"I have your boyfriend on the phone here."

"Abel," Cassidy said quietly under her breath.

"Yes Abel," He confirmed, "Now he'd like to know you're okay, and you're going to tell him that, and nothing more."

Cassidy nodded slowly, at least the gun to her head made sense now, she had gotten the silent threat, loud and clear. It's not like she even knew where she was, there was nothing she could tell him. Though she wasn't sure she would tell him where she was even if she knew, she didn't know what these men were capable, and she wasn't that interested in having Abel near any of them.

She would take her death over his any day.

As it was he would be the only person who would miss her, there would be a whole boat full of people who would miss Abel if anything where to happen to him.

"Abel?" She asked as the phone was held in front of her mouth.

"Cassie," His voice was equal parts relieved and panicked – with a healthy dose of anger, "Are you alright? Are you okay?"

"I'm fine," She said quickly as the sound of his voice washed over her like walking into a warm house after being outside in the winter, "And you?"

"I'm fine," He said back to her though she could tell that he was anything but that, "I'm going to get you back, everything's going to be okay, babe."

"I know," She repeated the same words she had said to him last night, knowing he would understand the double meaning behind them, "I know."

"Good."

The Priest held his hand out, his fingers making a motion to hand the phone back.

"I have to give the phone back, Abel."

"Don't be stupid, Cass," He warned her making her heart hurt at the familiar use of the word 'stupid' that had really became a term of endearment between the pair, she had recognized the double meaning behind the word 'stupid' just as he had recognized the double meaning behind the words 'I know.'

"I promise," Cassidy said quietly, "Hey Abel? I believe in you."

Cassidy wasn't sure why she had said those words, but as they led her back into the car, her legs protesting at being bent again, she realized she was glad she had. She believed in him, he was the only person in the entire world she believed in, the one person who had never let her down, and if she never got to talk to him again, he had to know that.

"Here."

She took the small paper cup – about the size of the plastic cups that came with medicine bottles – and looked down at the contents. It was clear, but considering how much was in it, and the way in which it had been handed to her, she figured it probably wasn't water.

"What is this?"

"Drugs."

Cassidy tucked her bottom lip into her mouth for a brief second, running her teeth over it, well they certainly didn't beat around the bush, "And what's it going to do to me?"

"Not kill you."

Cassidy was assuming that was code for the drugs won't kill you like we will if you don't take them. She bit her lip again, as she stared at it knowing eventually she was going to cave and down the contents of the cup, she just needed to find a little bit of courage somewhere in her spineless body.

Come on Cassidy, just down it like it's a shot. It was almost a helpful thought, if it wasn't for that fact that she had never had a shot in her life, Abel had this thing about her and drinking, not that she really cared, she wasn't all that interested in drinking, someone had to be the designated driver.

She closed her eyes for a brief second before pulling the cup to her mouth, but never getting a chance to drink the contents as the cool barrel of a gun was placed on her knee, and before she could so much as blink, the trigger was pulled, and an immeasurable amount of pain spread through her body, causing her to throw herself forward, and scream.


	4. Chapter 4

"This isn't a negotiation," Jax said firmly, "You give us the girl back, and I promise you a painless death."

Abel dropped his elbows onto the table and buried his face into his hands, god what the hell had he gotten into it? It was like someone had picked him up and dropped him into an alternate universe. A universe where his dad was either a murderer or obviously not above becoming one, where he was contemplating becoming a murderer himself, and his girlfriend was god knows where.

And god what the fuck was with this stupid reaper everywhere? And the gavel? And the fucking leather vest? It was like Jax was a badly dressed boy band member with what he was assuming was violent tendencies.

He almost didn't want to know how Tara dressed, if she was anything like her husband, she probably dressed like a fucking clown, unless she was like the other woman surrounding the repair shop, then his mother was just a whore, and then what the hell was he supposed to do with that?

Because then he would have being a whore in his blood, which he guessed he would rather be, then a leather vest wearing boy band member.

Or he could just be both.

"Tara's not a whore is she?"

"What?" Jax turned to look at him the picture of confusion and disbelief.

"Ignore me," Abel shook his head, he needed to get away from Jax, the man turned him into a twelve year old, who had absolutely no filter, was completely insane, and needed other people to solve his problems, he needed to get Cassidy, and he needed to get the hell away from Jax, otherwise he was pretty sure he was going to start spilling his life story to this man.

And while he didn't think Jax would care all that much that he was the one who had hotwired Matthew Kasen's car and then ran it into a tree just for the hell of it, and because he really freaking didn't like that kid, he wasn't sure how Jax would feel about the fact that he had spent a night in jail for it, considering he was so completely high that night.

But then again, judging by the mug shots plastered across the wall of the clubhouse, jail time seemed to be something revered in this – well whatever this shit was. Drugs however, he wasn't too sure about how well that would go over.

His dad hadn't given a shit, he was on a business trip like usual, and had simply made sure that he had the charges dropped, nobody ever found out he was high that night, and the bail had been posted. Even his mom didn't know he had been high that night.

"There's no need to trouble your mom with this, son. She doesn't need to know about the drugs." He had told Abel.

Definitely not the most Catholic thing his dad done, and his parents were hardcore Catholics.

God, that must have been the lowest point in his life, he was so sure that everything had gone to hell, that when Nick had handed him the crank, he had thought what the fuck, so he ignored Cassidy's pleas, he more than ignored them – he would never forgive himself for what he did to her that night – but that was the low.

It was so funny to think about how that was the worst night of his life, even now that she had been taken, that was still the worst night of his life.

What he had done to her, what he had done to himself, and all because he had thought his career was over, all because he thought he would never play soccer again.

It had all started with that single thought, that he would never play soccer again, and truly, that was all he had going for him, he wasn't all that smart, he wasn't all that talented, the only thing he was really good at was playing soccer.

And then he got better, and he could play again, and he made his high school soccer team national champions, he was already being recruited for college teams, he had his whole life figured out, everything was perfect, or as perfect as Abel's life could be, and now, now everything was all screwed to hell.

Up till yesterday the worst thing that had ever happened to him was getting into that accident, that tore his ACL, and three ligaments, and they were so completely sure his soccer career was over, right when it had barely begun.

And now, he could top that, now he had a set of biological parents who were as outlaw as his adoptive parents were Catholic, a girlfriend who was at the mercy of some corrupt Priest, and he was doing absolutely fucking nothing.

"Sorry about that Jackson, I had some business to take care of, now where were we, oh yes, we were discovering SAMCRO's future with the IRA, in exchange for the possibility of the girl having a future."

Oh Father, you have a way with words.

"No," Jax snapped, "We were talking about the way you were going to die, and how you were going to let the girl go."

Abel resisted the urge to grab the phone and broker the deal himself, not that he had anything to offer, but he had to be able to do something better than what Jax was doing. They were just going in the same circle, the Priest subtly threatening Cassidy's life, and Jax not so subtly threatening the Priest's life.

It was all just a cycle of neither side willing to compromise.

Didn't they know that the only way to win the game was to make a few sacrifices? In soccer, sometimes it was safer to kick the ball out of bounds then to risk the other team getting the goal. It was so obvious that the same principal applied here, Jax needed to sacrifice the goal for his team, so Father Kellan wouldn't truly score the goal for his team either.

The closer they got to Cassidy, the more the Priest lost.

"First part of this exchange, you're going to perform a gun run, simple transaction between the IRA and the Niners. We'll get you the gun shipment – same method as we used to – and you sell it to the Niners, you can even keep the profits."

Gun running? So maybe Jax wouldn't give a shit about Abel's little, one time, experiment with crank.

"No way," Jax shook his head, "The club doesn't do that shit anymore, and even if I were to, we have to vote that in. We got out, we make our earnings legit, you want to sell to the Niners be my guest, you don't need a middle man for that."

"You aren't being very accommodating Jackson, I have to say, your son and his ma were much more accommodating than you. The Lord gave them sense he didn't bless you with."

Abel rolled his eyes, he was getting really tired of hearing this man preach about God, and he had only heard him once. He was holding an innocent girl hostage, and yet he prided himself on being a man of God.

Abel wasn't a hardcore Catholic like his parents, he didn't believe in all the things that they believed in, but he had been forced to go to church every Sunday for his entire life, he had done confession, gone on church retreats, hell he had even gotten confirmed.

He didn't care much for religious bullshit, he didn't spend much of his time actually paying attention in church, he couldn't really tell you the first thing about being a Catholic, but what he did know was that Father Kellan was no man of God.

"Yeah well it's about time you gave my son his girlfriend back."

The Priest sighed, "It seems you're going to need some convincing. Tell me Jackson, have you ever been shot in the knee?"

Abel turned his head sharply in the direction of Jax and the phone, he didn't like where this conversation was going at all. Come on Jax, just kick the fucking ball out of bounds, make the sacrifice.

"If you hurt that girl-"

"I assure you it's very painful, in fact it's so painful that it makes one wish they were dead, so Jackson, I'd just like for you to know that you are the sole cause of the pain that this poor girl will be feeling."

"No!" Abel yelled his hands slamming onto the table, his chair flying backwards hitting the wall, as the same time as a piercing scream that he had never heard before, yet somehow recognized, echoed throughout the walls of the room, "Cassidy!"

"Make the deal," Father Kellan spoke softly, "Make the deal and she'll get the medical attention she needs. Don't do it, and she bleeds out after suffering for an extended period of time. It's your choice Jackson, do the gun run, or condemn her to an excruciating death."

The line went dead, and then before Abel really realized what he was doing, he was striding across the room, and slamming his fist into Jax's face. He ignored the yelling and the guns, and he punched at any of the guys who came at him, trying to pull him off of Jax, they were all the same to him.

They had all gone and done this to him, they had done this to Cassidy, and he would damned if they didn't do whatever it takes to get her back.

"ABEL STOP IT!"

The voice made him freeze as if it was Cassidy screaming at him to do so, he recognized the voice, it felt like when you know you have something to say, but you just can't seem to remember what it is. It was exactly like that, he knew the voice, he just couldn't remember from where.

She was exactly how she looked like in his dreams. Long soft brown hair, gentle green eyes, and a careful yet kind look on her face. She was the woman who danced in and out his dreams, someone he had crazily longed to be a real person, and now that she was standing there – now that it was so clearly obvious who she was – he wasn't surprised to realize, he didn't want to see her at all.

"Do the gun run," Abel said quietly his eyes never leaving hers, "You do whatever the hell he wants, or I'm going to start pulling bullets in people's kneecaps."

She nodded and held out her hands, "Let me clean you up."

"I'm fine."

"Go," Jax said in the same quiet tone he was using, "Go with Tara, get cleaned up. I'll handle the gun run, I'll make it happen."

Abel turned to look at Jax and shook his head, "Do you honestly think I trust you?"

"No," Jax shook his head taking a step forward, "And I have given you every reason not to you, but you're going to have to."

"This is your fault."

Jax took another step forward despite the fact that he looked like he had just gotten punched in the face – figuratively – despite the fact that Abel had just done that literally. He knew as well as Abel did that this was his fault.

"I know, but I'm telling you that I will handle it," Jax said, "I will fix this, and you can come back in here, sit in while I do that, after you get yourself cleaned up."

"I'm fine." He insisted.

Jax raised his eyebrows before speaking in a stern tone, "Abel, get yourself cleaned up, right now. You want to beat on me, that's fine, you want to be pissed off, that's fine, you have the right to be. But you will do as you're told, when you are told. Am I understood?"

Abel was hit with the urge to deck him again. Who the hell did Jax think he was? He didn't just get to tell him what to do, act like he was his dad, Abel already had one of his own, so maybe he was slightly absent, and didn't give a shit about what Abel did, but that didn't change the fact that he already had a dad, one that wasn't Jax.

He wasn't Jax's kid, he hadn't been for a very long time, and he didn't get to tell him what to do.

His head was perfectly clear about that, except there was some other part of him, that he couldn't quite pinpoint, that was feeling the need to do what Jax told him to. It was that same feeling that he got when Jax first looked at him, and it felt like he already knew his entire life story.

"Yes sir." Abel's tone was mocking and condescending and rude, and despite how teenager it was of him, he really freaking hoped that it pissed Jax off, and then he turned to Tara, and gave her a smirk he had perfected a long time before. "So I guess you aren't a whore after all, then."

Abel made have felt the need to do what Jax told him, but that didn't mean he was any less pissed off at him.


	5. Chapter 5

Abel sat quietly on top of the bar, as Tara stood in between his legs, her hands wiping at the cuts on his face, with gentle yet practiced ministrations. He did his best to ignore the silent tears that were making their way down her face, he didn't care what was wrong with her, she didn't have a bullet in her knee.

"Jax," Tara said quietly breaking the silence they had been awkwardly or thankfully – he hadn't decided which yet – been sitting in for the past few minutes, "Isn't used to be told what to do, he's the one who tells people what to do."

"I didn't tell him to do anything," He said roughly not bothering to mention that what he should have told Jax was to not be a dumbass. Maybe then he would quit playing around with Cassie's life.

"No," She agreed, "But he also isn't used to being disobeyed, the club answers to him, I choose my battles, and Thomas isn't one to need to be told what to do."

"Thomas?" Abel asked considering she had spoken the name like he should know who that was. These people hadn't understood yet, that he really didn't give a shit.

Tara froze in her ministrations before licking her lips and moving towards her medical bag, "Thomas is your little brother, he's seventeen, actually."

"Jesus Christ," Abel muttered running a hand through his hair, well this just got better and better, didn't it? Now not only did he have two sets of parents, and a missing girlfriend, now he had a little brother to deal with.

If he had wanted a sibling, he would have told his mom to go adopt another kid.

"Any other bombs you want to drop on me?" Abel asked resisting the urge to tell Tara to keep Thomas the hell away from him, he wasn't interested in playing happy family, he hadn't come here for them, he didn't want to know them, and he had no plans to do that.

"You sure you want to hear it?"

"Oh great," He said jumping off the counter, "There's more?"

"One more thing."

"Perfect lay it on me, Doc."

Tara opened her mouth to speak but nothing instead more tears formed in her eyes and a sad, almost wistful smile spread across her lips.

"What?"

"Nothing," She shook her head, "You called me Doc, and it was just weird, it was like I was talking to your dad."

"My dad is on a business trip in Texas, and my mom is at home probably worried out of her mind. So if you would just tell me whatever it is that you need to tell me, then the faster I can get my girlfriend, and get back to my life."

Abel hadn't mean to say that to her, but he was so fucking sick of Jax and Tara acting like they were his parents. They didn't get to call him son, they didn't get to reference to each other as his dad or mom, they didn't get to tell him what to do, they weren't his god damn parents, and it seemed they needed reminding of that particular piece of information.

"I'm not your mom," Tara said crossing her arms over chest, "Not your biological one, anyway."

"What are you talking about?" Abel asked after he had processed that, it couldn't have been a coincidence that he had dreamed about Tara before, and the Priest had told him Tara was his mother, and considering it was so completely obvious that Jax was his father, he never even thought of the possibility that he was lied to.

"Wendy Case," She spat the name out like it was some kind of disease, "That's your biological mom's name, and she's a junkie whore. She overdosed on crank, and we had to do an emergency C-Section, I was there during the operation, I assisted. You were born with a hole in your heart, and your insides upside down, I assisted on the operations to fix you. You want the truth Abel, your birth mother was a junkie whore who didn't give a shit about your or a shit about-"

"Tara," Jax's voice said loudly and strongly, "That's enough."

"Then why is your name on my birth certificate?" He had lied, there had been a copy of his birth certificate, one unmarred, where both her name and Jax's name was listed, he had lied to the Priest, not that it had really don't anything.

"Because I'm your mom, Abel. I chose you, and you chose me."

"Yeah?" He raised his eyebrows, "Well sorry to tell you this Tara, but you didn't chose me eighteen years ago, and neither did Jax. And I sure as hell don't choose you now."

The clubhouse fell silent as Abel became acutely aware that the entire club was staring at the three of them while he looked back and forth between Tara and Jax.

"I didn't come here for the truth," Abel said quietly and resignedly, "But maybe it's time I tell it to you, I am not your son, I haven't been your son for eighteen years. I have a mom, and I have a dad. I don't want you guys, not either of you, not Thomas, not any of you. I didn't come here because I was curious, I never gave a shit about where I supposedly came from, the only person I care about right now, the only reason I am here is for Cassie."

"And what would she think of you?"

Abel turned to face Jax, his hands forming a fist as if trying to comprehend the fact that Jax had just said that, that he had just went there.

"I don't know Cassidy, but I heard her on the phone. Do you think she wants this for you? Do you think she would want to see you like this?"

"Maybe after you start back up your illegal gun trading business, we'll talk to her, and find out," Abel said before adding harshly, "Or maybe she'll be dead by then, and if she's dead, then I guess it doesn't really matter what she thinks of me, does it?"

"You care so much about your dad, huh, Abel? Well he obviously didn't teach you much about respect did he? I'm not your dad Abel, I understand that, and if you want to keep talking to me like that, if you need someone to be angry at, go ahead, I can take it. But if you're going to be here, you are going to show Tara respect."

"Jackson, don't," Tara said quietly.

"God what is it with you two?" Abel laughed with no humor whatsoever, "Is this some kind of good cop bad cop? I don't give a shit about either of you."

"Then why the hell should I give a shit about your girlfriend?" Jax yelled so loudly that it echoed throughout the entirety of the clubhouse.

Abel shook his head, "You shouldn't, I'm sorry for coming here, it was a mistake. You didn't even give a shit about me, and I was your kid, I don't even know what possessed me to think that you would actually get an innocent girl out of the mess you created."

With that, he turned away from Jax, and stormed out of the clubhouse dodging Tara as she moved to grab his arm.

He got into his car, and backed it out in one quick motion, before hitting the road, at a speed that couldn't have been legal even in Germany.

God, he was such an idiot, Jax and Tara had given him up for adoption, not to mention Wendy didn't want him. None of these people here had wanted him, and they had all had him fooled thinking that they were actually willing to help Cassidy, like they actually gave a damn about someone other than themselves.

But they didn't, they didn't give a damn about Cassidy, about him, about anyone. They just didn't fucking care. They hadn't wanted him eighteen years ago, and they didn't want him there now.

And Abel was more than happy to comply with their wishes.

He drove till he got to the damn 'Welcome to Charming' sign and it took all of his self-restraint and then some not to plow his car through it. Instead he pulled off on the side of the road by the sign and turned off the car.

He was quite for a moment before he yelled in frustration and slammed his hands onto the steering wheel. He couldn't do this, he wasn't strong enough for this, he couldn't do this, especially not without Cassidy.

She was his rock, she was everything good and pure and innocent in the world, she was all the love in the world, and now that she was gone, it was like all the love had been sucked out of it as well.

Abel picked up his phone from the cup holder, his hand briefly grazing Cassidy's coffee cup, causing him to pull it back as if he had just been burned.

He sighed at his irrationality and pulled his phone up to his ear after dialing the familiar number.

"Abel? Baby, oh thank god!"

"Hey Mom," He smiled despite himself, "How are you?"

"Wrecked," She admitted, "Where are you Abel? What's going on? And Cassidy, oh god Cassidy."

"I can't tell you where I am, Mom," He said in the most rational tone he could manage, "But I promise you that I'm okay, I'm safe, it has to do with my birth family."

"Abel," She said quietly, "I never intended for you to find out this way. I was always going to tell you, but it just never seemed like the right time, and then-"

"Mom," He interrupted before she could throw herself into a bigger panic than she was already in, "It's okay, I already knew. I always knew."

Katy fell silent for a moment before she asked, "How did you know?"

"Besides the fact that I found my birth certificate? It just wasn't something that was a huge secret to me Mom, I just knew."

"Did you find anything else, any kind of papers, or just the birth certificate?"

"Just the birth certificate," He said slowly, "Why?"

"It's nothing," She said and Abel could just tell she was shaking her head in that manner that she had, "I promise, are you with them right now, your birth parents I mean?"

"No," He said honestly, "I'm working on getting Cassidy back."

Katy sighed over the phone, Cassidy wasn't just a big part of his life, she was also a big part of his mom's life. His dad was always out on his business trips, and whenever Cassidy even thought his mom was getting lonely, she'd drop everything and spend the day with her.

At first, it was little weird, but soon Abel had come to appreciate his mom and Cassidy's relationship. His mom was fragile, and she couldn't take much, he really couldn't even begin to comprehend how she was holding up now, Cassidy had protected her, kept the loneliness and paranoia at bay.

"We should call the police."

"We should," Abel agreed despite the fact that they both knew that neither of them were going to do that, "Have you talked to Dad?"

"Not yet," She admitted, "He's about to close that huge deal, and honestly I was too paranoid to use the phone, I didn't want to use it in case you called."

Abel was quiet for a moment, "I love you Mom."

"I love you too, baby, so much." There was something in her tone, like she was longing for something, but he couldn't do anything about it, not when he had so many other problems he had to solve himself.

"I'll call you soon Mom, I have to go."

"Abel, no matter what happens, I've always wanted the best for you, always."

"Mom," Abel said gruffly blinking back away the tears he had managed to keep at bay since all this had happened, "This is getting a little Hallmark."

"I get to be a little Hallmark, I was held at gunpoint yesterday."

Abel laughed despite the fact that the statement wasn't funny at all, "Alright Ma, I really need to go."

"You bring our girl home Abel in one piece, both of you."

"I will," He promised hanging up and throwing his phone across the length of his car.

He pulled at his hair with his hands and slammed his hands against the steering wheel repeatedly, yelling the word 'fuck' repeatedly as he did so.

He couldn't deal with this anymore, he couldn't take it, it had been twenty-four hours and he was already bent so far that he was about to snap in half. Everything he knew about his life was wrong, and nothing made sense.

Why was the Priest targeting him?

Who was the Priest working for?

What did the IRA want?

Where was Cassie?

How was he going to make it another day?

How was he going to survive this?

Everything was just wrong.

And Jesus Christ Tara, for as long as Abel could remember he had dreams about a beautiful woman with a kind face and gentle eyes, for as long as he could remember Tara had been making her way through his head, weaving her place into his life. She was supposed to be the good, she was supposed to make everything better, she was supposed to be able to fix anything, do anything, but above all Tara was supposed to be able to bring him peace.

But this was her fault, her and Jax had done this to him, she was his mother, and she had given him up, she had caused all this.

God he was a freak show with three mothers, two of which who didn't even want him.

While Wendy was something – or rather someone – he hadn't been expecting, it also went over his head, as far as he was concerned Tara had been there literally from the second he was born, she had all but saved his life, and that was as biological as he needed, Wendy was irrelevant.

That thought drove him insane more than anything, Tara had effectively saved his life and then ruined it.

And that was the problem, he didn't know how or when, but at some point, Tara had made an impression on him, an impression he had clung to so firmly, that the idea of her not being who she was in his dreams, was like turning his world upside down.

It was like screwing up everything that he believed in.

And if he was being complete honest, Abel didn't know what or who to believe, not anymore, and especially not himself.


	6. Chapter 6

So I wasn't going to post this till tomorrow, but this is my favorite chapter in the story so far, and it's makes me too happy, not to post.

Abel sighed as he cut his car engine, and got out. Quietly, he made his way across the lot and into the clubhouse. He froze in his tracks at the sight of Jax sitting at a table, his body slightly slumped, but otherwise still awake.

He wasn't sure what to say or do, he hadn't intended to see anyone here, that's why he had come so early, he had come back for the prepaid phone, and that was it. He had thought the clubhouse was empty.

"Jax." He said slowly when he realized he wasn't going to say anything first. Jax stood up and tossed the phone at him. Abel caught it on instinct, and stared at it wearily.

"If you really think you can do this by yourself, then you can take that, and you can go," Jax said seriously, "But if you don't, then put the phone on the table, and take a seat."

Abel didn't think about it, he dropped the phone on the table, and he sat down quietly. He was tired, and hungry, and he had spent the night sleeping in his car wearing the same clothes he had been wearing for over two days.

Abel didn't have any fight left in him, he was plain and simply resigned. Jax stared at him for a second before nodding and sitting back down in the same seat as he had been in before.

"Why are you here?"

Abel waited for a snappy retort, he waited for Jax to say something like this was his clubhouse, except he didn't. "I was waiting for you."

"Would you do it for Thomas?" Abel asked before he could stop himself, "If he snuck out would you stay up all night waiting for him?"

"In Charming, in this family, in this life, there's no such thing as sneaking out, somehow someone is always going to know where you are," Jax explained, "But yes, in theory, if Thomas were to sneak out then I would stay up all night waiting for him, and then I would I kick his ass."

Abel almost smiled at that. Almost.

"My dad's never around," He blurted out for some reason that he couldn't explain, that was a fact he usually kept to himself, "Don't get me wrong, when he's around he's a decent dad, but mostly he just isn't around."

"And your mom?"

Abel struggled for a moment trying to find a decent explanation that encompassed the complexity of his relationship with his mom.

"I love my mom," He said finally, "But I take care of her more than she takes care of me."

"I'm sorry."

"They're my parents," He shrugged.

Jax nodded like he understood all the underlying meanings of such a simple statement.

"We settled the gun deal between the IRA and the Niners."

"And Cassie?"

"The run isn't happening till we get proof Cassidy is okay."

Abel nodded slowly, "I'm not used to people telling me what to do."

"Yeah no shit," Jax laughed softly.

"And I'm not used to you."

"I know."

"It wasn't fair of you to put me in a position where my life has turned out like this," Abel said quietly, "But it also wasn't fair of me to barge in here all guns blazing. You guys aren't used to me either."

It was the closest thing Abel could offer in terms of an apology, and by the look on Jax's face, it was enough, maybe even more than that.

"What I said to you yesterday, about leaving, it still holds true, you are welcome to leave whenever you want, as long as you know, you are always welcome back."

Abel nodded but didn't let himself think too much into that statement because then that would lead to a whole new set of questions that he didn't think he could handle the answers to just then.

"Come on."

Abel stood up confused, "Where are we going?"

Jax looked at him, "Home."

"Home" turned out be a simple one story house resting in a perfectly normal looking neighborhood, and so, it was only natural that is was the most terrifying place Abel had ever seen in his entire life.

"Mom, I'm going-" A guy who could have only have been Thomas trailed of in the middle of his statement as he caught sight of Abel, and Abel caught sight of him.

His hair was blonde – a little darker blonde than his and Jax – but his eyes were Tara's green. He was probably about the same height as Abel, but whereas he was leaner from years of soccer, Thomas was more muscled.

"Tommy, wait, oh-" Tara froze.

It was like some kind of bad TV drama. Abel was staring at Thomas, Thomas was staring Abel, and Jax and Tara were looking between themselves and the brothers like they didn't know what to do.

"You look like shit," Thomas said finally, "You should borrow some of my clothes."

Abel nodded slowly as Thomas turned to Tara, "What is it, Mom?"

"Where are you going?" She asked in a slightly dazed tone.

Thomas smirked, a mischievous glint lighting up his eyes, "I'm going to crash Alena Rincon's party."

Jax laughed breaking the slight tension that was left, "When are you going to get it through your head, Thomas? Alena Rincon will never like you."

"Just wait and see old man," Thomas laughed snatching Jax's keys out his hand, "Persistence is key."

"Hey I never said you could take my bike," Jax called as Thomas mounted it.

"Then get me a car," He called over the roar of the engine.

"Little shit," Jax muttered as Thomas disappeared down the street.

"Baby, we really do need to get him a car," Tara pointed out thoughtfully.

"I'll get to it eventually," Jax brushed it off.

Abel was suddenly hit with a sense of discomfort, he didn't belong here. He didn't grow up in this house, or know how to drive a motorcycle, or know who Alena Rincon was, he didn't know these people, he didn't know anything.

He didn't know this town, he didn't know this life, he just didn't know.

That seemed to be his life now, everything was based on uncertainty, everything revolved around what he didn't know, rather than what he did know.

"Abel," Tara said softly as her hands raised into the air and then moved them towards her face like she wasn't sure was to do with them.

Abel sighed to himself, he was going to fucking regret this. He stalked forward and grabbed her hands, it wasn't a gentle movement nor was it a rough movement, and pulled her into his chest. He held her tightly for a moment, letting her wrap her arms around his neck, her small frame molding against his own.

This was the best he could do for Tara as far an apology went, for now, this was all he could give her. He couldn't listen to any of her explanations, and he wasn't too sure he could tell her about himself, even this was a lot for him, but this was all he had to offer her for now.

"What was that for?" She asked as he pulled away wiping at her tears.

"I guess I was just tired of being angry," He shrugged offering her half a smile.

"Well if you need to be angry, feel free to be inside," She nodded, "You will come inside won't you?"

"Sure." He nodded back.

Abel stared at the hand Tara grabbed as she pulled him inside the house, for a brief moment he considered pulling away, maybe he would, later.

The house was simple yet had the feeling of warmth surrounding it, she led him into the kitchen, and pushed him towards a wooden table sitting in the middle but still pushed out of the way.

"Alright what do you want? A sandwich, a salad, pasta, I think we have some leftover chicken, or I can even make some chicken, anything you want." She called over her shoulder as she pulled open the refrigerator.

Abel open his mouth to reply when a pair of clothes and a towel were tossed in front of him.

"Here, those are Thomas' but they should fit you, there's a bathroom right at the end of the hall, so you can take a shower after you eat."

He stared between Jax and Tara with a dumbfounded expression before shaking his head, "Why are you guys being so nice to me? I wasn't exactly all that nice to you."

"You aren't a parent, Abel," Tara said slowly, "And as much as we aren't your parents, Abel we're your parents, and that's not something that we can ever turn off. And if Jax told me right, then you haven't had much taking care of, so just let me get you something to eat, okay? And take a god damn shower."

Abel scoffed in disbelief and turned to Jax, "You're a gossipy old lady."

"What did you just call me?"

"I told you that all of a half an hour ago, how did you even manage telling her that already?"

"You better watch yourself kid."

"Watch myself?" Abel half-laughed, "I'm not the one whose pussy whipped."

"First of all you are too white boy to use the word pussy, and second of all, I am not pussy whipped." Jax laughed.

"Bro," Abel shook his head holding up a hand in front of his face, "Don't say the word pussy, you're my-"

Abel trailed off the smile leaving his face at the same time as it left Jax's, he wasn't sure where he was going with that statement, but he sure as hell wasn't about to say the word 'dad.'

Even if he was thinking it.

"How about a chicken salad with a sandwich on the side?" Tara asked breaking the tension filled moment.

"Babe that's chick food, make him a burger or something."

Tara rolled her eyes and spoke in a bored tone, "Abel, Jackson here would like to have a burger, are you going to agree with him or are you going to crush all his hopes and dream?"

"Hey," Jax grabbed a carrot that she had been cutting up and chucked it at her, "I didn't ask for your sass, woman."

"I am an old lady," Tara grinned ducking despite the fact that the carrot still hit her shoulder, "It comes in the job description."

"Being your husband should come with a job description," He grumbled.

"Watch it," Tara pointed the carrot she had picked up off the floor at Jax, "Or maybe you just might find yourself with your own Alena Rincon."

Abel didn't get the reference, but it still made him smile.

"I shouldn't stand for this," Jax glanced at Abel whose small smile was slowly starting to grow, "Do you let Cassidy treat you like this?"

He shook his head playing along, "I got the reins on my girl. Where did you go wrong?"

"Abel Teller!" Tara shrieked tossing the carrot at his head, "You treat women with respect, and oh my god."

Tara's hand came to her mouth as she shook her head an apologetic look taking over her features, "Abel I am so sorry, I didn't mean to say that."

"It's okay." He said gently, but really, it had thrown him off. First he had nearly referred to Jax as his dad – which he wasn't – and now Tara had called him Abel Teller – Teller.

"It's Petrie, right?" Jax asked carefully, "Abel Petrie."

Abel nodded slowly, but for the first time in his life, his own name sounded awkward, Abel Petrie didn't quite have the same kind of sound as Abel Teller.

"How about a burger?"

Abel figured it was his turn to break the tension, and who was he to deny a perfectly good burger? Or to deny his father of one?

Tara nodded as she shot him one more apologetic look before pulling things out of the fridge.

"So who's Alena Rincon?" Abel asked when he realized that both Jax and Tara had no idea what to say to him. He figured they had a good reason, twelve hours ago he probably would have gone bat shit crazy if someone had called him Abel Teller, he was still debating it, but he was really trying to make an effort here.

An effort for Cassidy, and if someone got him drunk enough, maybe he'd be able to admit that maybe he was making an effort for himself as well.

Jax laughed as Tara started to scold him despite the fact that she was laughing too.

"Alena Rincon is the girl your brother has been in love with since like the fucking third grade."

"And?" Abel raised his eyebrows.

"I don't even think she knows Thomas' name," Tara laughed.

"And we find joy in his misery?" Abel clarified.

"He's not miserable," Tara waved him off, "I'm pretty sure he's more in love with the thrill of chasing her, more than he is actually interested in her."

"That girl is too damn smart for him." Jax added.

Abel looked between Jax and Tara before adding quietly, "Sounds like a couple I know."

"Oh yeah, Cassidy beat your SAT score?" Jax shot at Abel's not so subtle reference at Tara's brains, and Jax's lack of it, at least in the book smart department.

"Hell yeah she did," Abel owned up to it. His girl had gotten a nearly perfect score on her SAT, and he wasn't even ashamed of the fact that he was fucking proud of her.

"Hey Abel," Jax said softly and for the first time since Abel had met him, Jax sounded hesitant, "About yesterday? Anyone who is important to you, is important to me, is important to this family, anyone."

"What Jackson has so eloquently put is that, you are important to us," Tara said firmly, "I know it doesn't make sense to you right now, but you are important to us, that means Cassidy is important to us, that means we'll do whatever it takes to get her back, no matter what."

"I know I'm asking a lot," Abel said quietly as he looked down at his hands.

"You know kid, if you had come here asking me for twenty million dollars I would have found a way to get you it," Jax said dropping a hand on his shoulder and crouching down in front of him, "If you had come here for a cup of coffee, I would have found a way to get you that too. Nothing you ever ask of me, will be a lot, if you can man up and ask for help, then I will always give it to you."

"Hey Jax?" Abel asked suddenly feeling like a little kid again, "Will you help me find Cassie? I know I didn't ask before, I just demanded, but I'm asking you now, please, help me find Cassie."

"You got it buddy," Jax smiled before standing up and moving towards Tara who was unsuccessfully trying to hide her eavesdropping by flipping burgers, and sliding his arms around her waist, his chin resting on her shoulder, as he playfully kissed her neck, making her laugh.

And for just a brief moment, Abel could picture what his life would have been like with these people, all three of them, Jax, Tara, and even Thomas. Just for a brief moment, he could imagine that he would have been happy here, with them.


	7. Chapter 7

"Do you understand?"

"Yes," Cassidy said softly as she stared into the mirror, her hand running a brush through her blonde hair despite the fact that she had been brushing it for the past twenty minutes, as she avoided looking at Father Kellan through the mirror.

"Tell me what you understand."

"I'm not to leave this house," She said gesturing towards her crutches that were leaned up against the wall, "Not that I really could even if I tried, but if I did try, this anklet I'm wearing will automatically send an electrical shock into my body, knocking me out."

"Well then," Father Kellan stood up, "I think we are done here, I trust you will be happy here Ms. Somers, at least till I can get you back to your family."

"Don't do me any favors," She said quietly as he exited the room.

Cassidy sighed as she took in the master bedroom, just one part of her own personal prison. She wasn't sure when they had gotten here, wherever here was, all she knew was that after the man – who she had named Scrugs for no reason whatsoever – had shot her through the knee, she had passed out, and when she had woken up, she was here in this bedroom, on this bed, with Father Kellan waiting for her to wake up, so he could tell her something about a gun run happening, and how they had patched her knee up.

She looked down at her left leg, the same leg that she had been shot in, and stared at the hunk of metal that was wrapped around her ankle. It was a tracking anklet that was currently blinking green – which allowed Cassidy to assume that no one was going to try to electrocute her just then – that Scrugs had taken way too much delight in putting on her.

If she hadn't been a prisoner before, she definitely was one now.

Cassidy grabbed the crutches that were leaning against the wall and tucked them underneath her arms wincing as she did so. If she hadn't just had her entire knee shattered, she probably would have thought using the crutches were one of the most painful things ever.

She was no stranger to pain, in fact she was very used to it, resulting in a high threshold of being able to withstand it, however, she also had absolutely no upper body strength, and the crutches were really showing her that.

The house was big, she realized, it was only one story, but it was big, with a wide, open layout, and judging the by floor to ceiling windows, the house was in the middle of nowhere, as far as she could see there was only grass, dead grass at that.

"Where exactly are we?" She asked Scrugs as she crutched her way into the kitchen where he was currently sitting at the table a laptop in front of him, and a stack of folders pushed off to the side, she doubted she wanted to know what was in either of those.

"We're home love."

"Let me rephrase that, are we even in the United States anymore?" She asked moving towards the fridge and yanking it open.

"Aye."

Cassidy nodded to herself before pulling out eggs, mushrooms, peppers, and some cheese, "Are you hungry?"

Scrugs looked at her for a second too long before nodding slowly as if he wasn't quite sure what to make of her question. Hey, she wasn't the one who was handing out drugs like they were party favors, that was all this guy.

She had just figured that he didn't look like the kind of guy who cooked, and as sweet as the idea of freedom was, she also wasn't going to starve this guy. It wasn't like he could just go out and grab some takeout, or order in. She figured he was stuck here just as much as she was.

"So, did you always picture your life would turn out like this?" She asked digging through drawers and pulling out a pan, and a cutting board, and scoffed to herself when she realized that the only knives in the kitchen, were plastic ones. She would have to make do with that.

"Like what?"

"Well the whole tracking anklet and the house, really just makes this a glorified version of grounding for me, but you aren't really doing anything, you're just my baby-sitter."

"This is an honor."

"What being able to spend time with me?" She laughed as she cut the pepper with took a bit too much effort on her part.

"No, being part of the downfall of Jax Teller."

Cassidy's hand froze in the action of roughly stabbing into a red pepper for a brief second before she resumed the action pretending like the statement didn't bother her. "Oh?"

"Jax Teller is your old man's da." Scrugs said informatively.

"I know," Cassidy said as she dropped the peppers into the bowl where she had cracked the eggs in. That was one of the very few things she did know, she remembered everything about the night she had been taken, she remembered the names Jax and Tara, it wasn't a detail she was ever likely to forget.

"I bet your wondering what you have to do with all of this."

"Isn't it obvious?" She asked as she began cutting at the mushrooms, it wasn't hard to figure out why she was taken, "You need Jax to do things for you, but he would never just help you, however if Abel were to ask him, I'm guessing he would be more inclined to comply, and the only way to get Abel to go to Charming was to have something that would make Abel run there. I'm Abel's incentive, so in turn he could be Jax's incentive."

"That's very perceptive Ms. Somers, and while that holds true, you're role to play in this is bigger than that."

"Is that so?" She asked trying to downplay her curiosity as she added the mushrooms to her concoction.

"Of course, you are the incentive here, that is your entire role, but you aren't just Abel's incentive."

Cassidy paused in the act of pouring the eggs into a pan that was currently being heated on the stove, "What do you mean? Jax doesn't care about me, taking me isn't any incentive for him."

"First of all, you, Cassidy, seem to have an ability to make anybody want to help you-"

"That's not true," She interrupted him.

"If it isn't then why am I having this conversation with you right now? Why am I answering your questions?" Scrugs raised his eyebrows.

"Maybe you just like hearing the sound of your own voice," She said in a playful tone as she poured the eggs into a pan, and taking a spatula, and holding it between her teeth as she reached up into the cupboards unsure of what she was looking for, but doing it anyway.

"Maybe I do, and maybe someone has damaged you so badly that you can't tell the kind of effect you have on people."

Cassidy dropped the bowl that was in her hand, and spun around faster than it should have been possible for a girl who only had one working leg. She grabbed the spatula out of her mouth with her hand as she stared at him with wide eyes. "Why would you think that?"

"Besides your reaction right now, well that has to do with the other person you are going to be an incentive for."

Cassidy closed her eyes holding warm tears, this was not happening right now, this was not happening to her. They couldn't know, nobody knew, god even Abel didn't know, he was lying to her that had to be the only reasonable explanation. No one who took you captive was so willing to give you information unless it wasn't real.

"You're lying," She accused in a hoarse tone.

"Am I?" Scrugs raised his eyebrows and pointed at her leg, "You're entire knee is shattered, we didn't fix that knee, just made sure the bleeding stopped, unless you get a knee replacement, you are never going to walk again Cassidy."

"I know that."

"Exactly, yet you didn't even bat an eyelash, you haven't been given any medicine, you have to be in copious amounts of pain, yet you haven't so much as flinched. You've barely paid any mind to the injury. You're used to it Cassidy, you are used to the pain."

"You have no idea what you're talking about," She shook her head as her tears finally made her way down her face.

"Don't I?" Scrugs stepped forward, "I know exactly who you are, I'm from Ireland, I was recruited in the IRA at the age of twelve, they picked me up off the streets, taught me how to shoot gun, how to set a bomb, how to detonate one, how to kill, I was born in a warzone."

"What does that have to do with me?"

"It has everything to do with you, because that's how I know who you are. When I look at you, I see myself."

"I am nothing like you," Cassidy cried.

"Aren't you? You want to know why we are one in the same, Cassidy? It's simple really, I was born in a warzone, and so were you."

"I was _not _born in a warzone," She said heatedly.

"Yes you were," He said taking a step closer to her, "You were born in a warzone, and ever since you've been running from one."

"I have not."

"Really? So the name Mick Holland means nothing to you?"

"You know what?" Cassidy said turning off the gas, "I'm not hungry anymore. I think I'm just going to go walk by the front door so somebody electrocutes me, because that sounds like something much more productive to do instead of having this conversation with you."

She grabbed the crutch she had laid against the island before tucking it under her arm and moving away, but she didn't get far before Scrugs grabbed her arm, causing her crutches to fall, and swung his fist directly into her face.

She cried out, and tucked her chin into her chest as she fell, her arms moving forward to catch her fall.

Survival Rule Number One: When you go down, tuck your chin into your chest, it helps prevent concussions.

"You didn't even flinch," Scrugs scoffed shaking his head, "You were provoking me, you knew I would hit you. Like I said Cassidy, there are many layers that are going to go into ruining Jax Teller's life, but I never said there wouldn't be collateral damage along the way. I think you'll find that your life is going to go up in flames as well by the end of this."

"If you're so sure I was born in a warzone," Cassidy said quietly as she pushed herself up, "Then that means I survived one. That means I know how to survive, you can't ruin my life Scrugs, not when there is so little of it to ruin."

"I think you'll find that the little that is left will be easy to destroy, after all you're going to help me do it. You're going to do it to yourself."

(Abel)

Abel sighed as he rested his head against the wall of the hospital waiting room, it was four in the morning, and they had been there since two.

He didn't know the details but there had been some kind of problem at the gun run, the issue had been resolved but not before a man he now knew as Tig had been shot in the chest, and had to be brought into the hospital.

"Can I help you?"

Abel turned to look at who Tara – who had otherwise been sitting quietly next to him – was talking to, and stood up as well when the man flashed a badge at Tara.

"I'm looking for the family of Alex Trager?"

"That's us," Jax said firmly cutting in and placing his body between Tara and the man in a move that wasn't territorial at all.

Abel frowned as he stared at the man, he had absolutely no idea who this man was but something about him seemed vaguely familiar, like he recognized something in him, or had seen him before.

"Well the hospital is legally required to let the police know when someone comes in with a bullet wound or anything similar, so when he wakes up, I need to have a word with him."

"And who exactly are you?" Jax raised his eyebrows.

"FBI," The man flashed his badge again, "Agent Holland."


	8. Chapter 8

"_Hey Petrie!"_

_Abel turned around and ducked as an empty water bottle sailed neatly over the top of his head, and scowled at his best friend as he stood up smoothly. "What asshat?"_

"_Call Cassidy."_

"_Right now? Why?" Abel raised his eyebrows as he grabbed his backpack off the floor and dug through the front pocket to get his phone that he had turned off last period since he had been out on the field playing a scrimmage._

"_No clue she just called me when you wouldn't pick up and said you need to call her."_

_Abel glanced at the clock, and then sighed, and threw his backpack over his shoulder, and pointed as Nick as he walked by, "Tell Mixon I died or something."_

_Nick laughed, "Sure, I'll just be like 'hey Mr. Mixon, Abel isn't here because he's dead and not because he's pussy whipped for a girl who he isn't even dating."_

"_Shut up," He rolled his eyes as he walked out of the classroom, and minutes later, he was walking into the parking lot towards his car, dialing Cassidy's number as he went._

_He mentally groaned to himself when she didn't pick up, stupid girl, she went and got him all worked up, and then didn't even answer her damn phone._

_Abel wasn't sure when it happened, maybe it was somewhere between the shy smiles that passed between the two and the midnight conversations, but Cassidy had made her way under his skin, and ever since then he had been doing his best to get her out of his head._

_But then Cassidy would go and do something adorable, or she'd need something, and Abel would find himself lost in her all over again._

_He turned into her driveway and got out, grabbing his phone that was still ringing endlessly and ended the phone call at the same time as ringing the doorbell._

_He rang it again when she didn't answer the door, and then knocked on it when that didn't work either. Finally after a few moments the door knob turned, and then the door opened just the slightest bit._

"_Abel," She said quietly._

"_Cassie?" He frowned taking in the worry that was stretched across her features, "What's wrong? Nick said you want me to call you?"_

"_Yes Abel," She frowned back, "Call me, not come to my house."_

_Abel raised his eyebrows, "So I can't come in then?"_

"_No," She shook her head, "You can't, just, I'll call you later."_

"_Cassie wait," He said as she went to close the door._

"_What?" She sighed._

"_Why did you call me then?"_

_Cassidy gave him a sad smile, "Call it a moment of weakness."_

_Abel cursed as she closed the door. Cassidy Somers was the most infuriating girl he had ever met in his entire life, she had this ability to be the sweetest human being in the entire world at the same time as being the most insufferable._

_He was about half way down the walkway of her front door when a loud bang echoed from the house causing him to turn around, and walk right through the front door, to hell with what she wanted._

"_Cassie!" He called and realized he didn't need to because she was right to the left of him, on her knees, her hands scrubbing the wooden floor, there was vomit everywhere, he realized, that's what she was cleaning up._

"_I told you to leave," She said quietly._

"_I heard a noise." He defended his actions._

"_That was my mother."_

"_Is she okay?"_

"_She's fine." _

"_Cassie," Abel said slowly as he took in the house, it was a complete mess, there were bottles, and napkins, and plates, and vomit everywhere, it was littering the floor in splotches, and by the looks of it she had been cleaning for a while considering the trash bags that were lined up against the wall of the hallway._

"_You can run now," She laughed bitterly, "I knew I shouldn't have called you."_

_Abel watched her for a moment, he could give her a whole speech about how she could always call him, he could tell her all about how she had gotten under his skin, and even though he had been trying to run ever since he had realized that, it didn't seem to be working, so it didn't look like he was going anywhere._

_He was stuck with her, so by that same notion, she was stuck with him._

_But he didn't, instead he rolled up the sleeves of the plaid shirt he was wearing, grabbed an empty trash bag, and began picking up empty bottles, throwing them in the bag._

_They worked quietly neither of them sure what to say to each other, and to scared to be the one who said anything first. Abel wasn't even sure what to say, he didn't even know where the mess had come from, he didn't have a clue what was going on, he was just taking Cassidy's lead, and following it._

_He froze in his tracks at the sight of woman lying on the floor a bottle held loosely in her hand, she was out cold, but her chest moving up and down told him that she was still alive and she was just passed out._

"_She's fine," Cassidy sat quietly as she walked in behind him, "Just really, really drunk."_

"_That's why you called me?" He turned to look back at her._

_She hesitated for a second before nodding slowly, "She wouldn't stop throwing up, and well, she's drunk all the time, but she's never been sick like that before. I didn't know what to do."_

"_And I'm guessing this," He gestured to the dark-haired woman sprawled across the floor, "Is something you do know what to do with."_

"_You can't tell anybody, Abel," Cassidy said looking up at him wide eyes, "You have to promise me that you won't tell anyone."_

"_Cassie," He hesitated as she gently took the bottle out of her mom's hand, "You can't live like this."_

"_She's my mom Abel, and contrary to popular belief, not all drunks are mean drunks. In fact, my mom's a happy drunk. She laughs, and she dances in her underwear, and sure she's really needy, and I have to cook her meals, and clean up after her, and be her mother, but she's happy, and what so wrong about that? Why is it so bad if it makes her happy?" _

_Abel stared at her. She was stunning, even now, in a pair of tiny jeans shorts, and a shirt that fell off her shoulder, with her hair tied back in a messy ponytail that was already coming apart, and suddenly he was hit with an overwhelming urge to kiss her._

_And so because he was a classy guy who kissed girls for the first time over their drunk mother's passed out body, he grabbed Cassidy by her hips, and pressed his lips against hers._

_Her body melted into his, one hand cupping his face, the other lightly grabbing his short hair, as her lips began moving with his own._

"_Why did you do that?" She breathed when they finally pulled apart._

"_Call it a moment of weakness."_

"You did this!" Bobby yelled pointing a figure in Abel's face snapping him out of his memory, "You did this! It isn't a coincidence that as soon as you show up demanding we work with the IRA again that the FBI showed up!"

Abel blinked but kept his mouth shut, he was perfectly aware of how it looked, and he wasn't stupid, Bobby wasn't wrong, this wasn't a coincidence, it wasn't a coincidence that someone had gotten shot on that gun run, it wasn't a coincidence that the IRA had demanded a gun run, it wasn't a coincidence that the FBI had shown up, and it wasn't a coincidence that all this had happened after Abel had shown up.

The only thing that Bobby had gotten wrong was that this was Abel's fault, he hadn't done any of this, the only thing he was guilty of was being the messenger.

"Enough," Jax yelled loudly, "That's my kid Bobby, you would do well to remember that."

"A kid you know absolutely nothing about! A kid who barged in here throwing punches, making demands, and acting like we owe him something! We don't owe him anything, we aren't anybody's bitches. Not even Jax Teller's son."

"Would you be acting like this if it was Thomas?"

Chibs had effectively put an end to Bobby's tirade by asking that question, and stopped Jax from pounding Bobby's face in, which Abel was pretty sure he had been just about to do. He tried really hard not to appreciate that.

"That's different, we _know _Thomas."

"I'm a soccer player," Abel said quietly before they could argue again, "I play forward, I'm from Connecticut, my parent's names are Mark and Katy, I buried my dog in a place right outside my bedroom window so I can always see him, I'm terrible at English, and I'm really good at math. I hate any kind of liquid food, I'm still not sure if I want to go to UCLA or Penn State, and thanks to all the irony in the world, I have plans to major in Criminal Justice."

"Great so you're going to college to be a Fed, now I really want to help you."

"I'm not asking you to help me, the only person I asked to help me was Jax, I never asked the rest of you for anything. I don't know how your club works, I don't know how you make decisions, so you can say I came in here acting like you owed me something, but I didn't. I came in here acting like Jax owed me something." Abel corrected.

He had done a lot of things in the few days he had been here, and he hadn't gone about making things happen in the most productive of ways, but the one thing he knew he had never done was ask the club for anything. He had asked Jax, he had yelled at Jax, and he wasn't going to let anyone tell him any differently.

"I'm going to let you guys work out whatever it is you need to work out," He said exiting the conference room, even now that he knew that it was called the 'Chapel' he couldn't bring himself to actually call it that, it was too weird.

"Tough crowd?" Thomas asked raising his eyebrows from the picnic table at the front of the clubhouse.

"You have no idea," Abel shook his head.

"Actually I do."

"Right," He nodded, "You grew up with them."

"They don't like strangers," Thomas shrugged.

"They don't seem to like a lot of things."

"They don't," He said standing up and nodding his head in the direction of Abel's car, "Come on."

"Where are we going?" He asked cautiously as he made his way towards his car.

"Who cares? You drive a BMW bro, a nice ass one at that, you should drive your car just for the sole purpose of driving it."

Abel stared at Thomas, and suddenly he was hit with this overwhelming sense of protectiveness, maybe it was the mischievous glint that made its way into his green eyes when he smiled, or maybe it was because Thomas was the only person who hadn't acted like Abel being here was this incredible or terrible thing.

It was almost like Thomas was acting like Abel had always been there. And suddenly Abel felt like his brother.

"Here," Abel tossed him the keys, "Why don't you drive?"

"Seriously?"

"Go it for it, bro," He laughed getting into the passenger seat.

They had been on the road for about twenty minutes, driving in circles for absolutely no reason whatsoever, when Thomas finally broke the silence.

"What does she look like?"

"Who?"

"Cassidy."

"Oh," Abel said quietly as he thought about it, "Like you actually."

"Me?"

"Well not like you," He amended the statement, "She has blonde hair and green eyes like you, she has the same features as you, but they just look completely different on her."

"She hot?"

"I mean I have to think so don't I?"

"Point taken."

"What about Alena Rincon?" Abel raised his eyebrows as he studied the scuff marks on his dashboard – the scuff marks from Cassidy's feet, "She hot?"

Thomas whistled as Abel forced his gaze away from the scuff marks, "As hell."

"What does she look like?"

"Do you want to find out?"

"What do you mean?" Abel asked.

"Let's go crash another party, bro," Thomas smirked pressing down on the gas just the slightest bit.

Abel was just about to give him the okay when his cell phone vibrated in the cup holder, "Its Jax."

"Pick it up," Thomas shrugged, "Just don't tell him you're with me. He'll tell Mom, and Mom will freak out because I'm taking her precious baby to a party, and then you'll have ruined my night, bro."

Abel laughed and for a brief second wondered if this was what his life would have been like if he had grown up a Teller. Maybe he would have spent nights covering up for his little brother so he could sneak out and do things like get drunk.

"Hey," He said as he picked up the phone.

"Abel? The Priest just called, he gave us his next demand."


	9. Chapter 9

"It just doesn't make sense," Jax said for what felt like the millionth time, "What could the IRA hope to gain by making Abel go buy a block of coke from the Mayans?"

"Gang member unity?" Abel asked sarcastically.

"Don't be a smartass," He snapped, "And no, because we are cool with the Mayans."

Abel figured he should shut up, Jax didn't want an answer to his question, something about this next request from the IRA was seriously bothering him, and it seemed like the best choice for him was to be quiet and let him work through whatever he needed to.

The way he saw it, compared to selling a shit load of illegal weapons to a different motorcycle club, having Abel buy a block of coke from the Mayans was like a walk in the park, hell to him that was like a walk in the park with Cassidy.

How hard could it be? All he had to do was hand some guy money and he would hand him drugs back.

But apparently Jax wasn't seeing it like that. Either Jax had become extremely paranoid overnight, had something against the Mayans, or really hated something about drugs. And Abel was leaning towards the last option, drugs seemed to piss Jax off to a whole new degree.

So that probably meant telling him the Matthew Kasen story was out of the question.

"Does it matter, Jackie Boy?" Chibs spoke up, "This is something simple, this is something we can easily do."

"Oh yeah let's just send my kid to buy some drugs, there is nothing shady about that. There has to be some other angle here, this can't just be about him buying drugs."

Abel mentally sighed as Chibs quieted down, him and the club didn't agree on much – they didn't know each other, and they had both turned the others' worlds upside down – but what they could all plainly see was that Jax wasn't looking at this with a clear head.

There was something about this task that was really getting to him, there had to be, because he hadn't put this much of a fight up for the gun-running. He wasn't sure what it was, but Abel had a really good feeling that it was about him.

"Jax," Abel tried to reason, "We don't really have a choice, and Chibs is right, how dangerous can buying drugs be? I know you all think I'm incompetent, but I'm still a teenager, and teenagers like to buy things like drugs."

"You don't understand," Jax yelled loudly making him flinch as he hadn't been expecting it, "All of this, it's bigger than you, Abel. Why do you think I let you go? It was to keep you safe, from all of this. I know that it doesn't sound dangerous to you right now, but everything, _everything, _in Charming is dangerous, including doing teenager things like buy drugs."

Abel blinked slowly as he made his hands into fists, not out of anger, but simply because he didn't know what else to do. They had been dancing around the subject for what felt like forever, they didn't stray away from the fact that he was adopted, but they avoided any and all conversations about how he had gotten there.

He wasn't even sure he was ready to have that conversation, and if he was being completely honest, he wasn't too sure Jax was ready to have that conversation with him either, not with so much going on, not with Abel being a bomb ready to explode at any moment, and Jax worrying about every possible thing that could go wrong in all of this.

This was the first time his adoption had actually been mentioned, and it wasn't what he had thought he was going to hear. Abel had spent his whole life thinking his birth parents hadn't wanted him, to him, there was no other logical reason to give him up, and he was okay with that, he had parents, incredible ones at that.

And then he had come to Charming, and his suspicions had all but been confirmed, they couldn't have wanted him, it wasn't like they didn't want kids, they had Thomas, he figured he had just been too damn broken for them to want, too damaged at birth.

And now here Jax was saying that he had 'let him go to keep him safe', whatever that meant. But that along with Tara saying that she had 'chosen him' was putting thoughts in his head that were dangerous for an adopted kid to have.

Those kinds of words gave a kid hope that they hadn't just blatantly thrown him away like he was piece of trash that they couldn't love, they had an actual reason for giving him up, for not keeping him.

But then he remembered that they had kept Thomas, and if they had truly wanted to 'keep him safe' wouldn't they have wanted the same for their other son?

It all just made no sense to him, and confusion was settling around in his mind, making itself a permanent fixture in his life.

"It's not a big deal, I'll go buy the drugs, drop them off here, or in the river, or the trash, whatever you want to do with them, and we'll call it day," Abel said brushing it off.

"Don't talk about this like it's already decided, we haven't even voted yet." Jax said pointing a finger at him.

"There is nothing to vote," He said in a firm tone – even if there was, the club would have only turned it down for Jax, not for any good reason, "This isn't a task for the club, it's something I have to do, it's my decision."

"Yeah?" Jax raised his eyebrows and crossed his arms over his chest – maybe in another world Abel would have found that intimidating, "And who's going to pay for your drugs?"

"I'll pay for it myself," He said simply.

"You don't have any money."

"I have a debit card."

"You can't pay for a block of coke with a debit card, Abel."

"I'll go to an ATM."

Abel realized how he sounded, he sounded like a spoiled asshole who thought he was better than everybody, and could do as he pleased, when he felt like doing so. He was acting like he was the biggest man in the room, and he was untouchable.

And even though he knew he wasn't, Jax's words about letting him go had confused Abel so fiercely that it had caused him to slam the walls he had put up back up but even stronger, he couldn't think about things like being happy in this world, he couldn't think about things like what could have been. They were dangerous thoughts, and he needed to stop thinking about them.

He needed to go back to his mindset of doing whatever it took to get Cassidy back, and then getting the hell out of dodge, it was the only way he was going to survive this emotionally.

Before all this, the idea of his birth parents not wanting him didn't matter, he didn't know them, they didn't know him, and he didn't give a fuck, he liked it that way. But now that he knew them, now that he knew the kind of people that they were, Abel knew he wouldn't be able to handle being rejected from them. Not twice.

"And your parents won't notice you just going ahead and withdrawing that kind of money?"

Another first.

While they had talked about his parents, Jax had never openly pointed out that they were his parents, and he could face repercussions, and questions from them. It was surprisingly a relief that Jax knew so little about his life, and about his family.

"They won't care," Abel said dryly despite the fact that the real answer was no. His parents wouldn't notice, they didn't pay any attention to the money he spent, or what he spent it on, but he figured that would add to the spoiled asshole theory, and he didn't feel like adding any more fuel to that particular fire.

And more than that, that answer would lead to the question 'why' and he really didn't feel like explaining just why his parents didn't care how much money he spent, he was having a hard enough time trying to separate his real life from whatever this was.

"Your parent's don't seem to care about a lot." Jax said stiffly.

"That's not really any of your business is it?" Abel asked.

God he hated this, it was all so hot and cold, so bipolar, one minute he thought Jax could do anything, and the next he was resisting the urge to slam his fist into his face – not unlike the time he had actually done it.

They were taking one step forward and two steps back.

And the problem was Abel never knew what Jax would say – or even what he would say – that would get to him, that would remind him that he wasn't playing happy family here, that shit had happened, and that nothing about this was normal or happy.

He was constantly waiting for the floor to fall beneath his feet, and there wasn't a worse feeling than that.

Other than maybe what he felt the day they took Cassidy.

"No, I guess it isn't. Go buy your coke, Abel, do whatever you want, you seem to be doing that anyway," Jax said finally after staring at him for a long moment.

Just as Abel had slammed his walls back up, Jax had done the same. It was almost scary how alike they were sometimes, and Abel hated that he had to admit that, maybe that's why Jax pissed him off so much, he hated the way Jax acted sometimes, but what he hated more than that, was that if put in the situation he would probably make the same decisions that Jax did.

It was like looking at who he could have become if he had grown up in this town – grown up in this world – and Abel wasn't sure if that terrified him or amazed him.

Whatever smart remark Abel was going to say was lost to him as the phone rang against the wooden table. They all stared at it like idiots for a moment, before Jax finally picked it up with an angry, "What?"

Seconds later, Jax was walking out of the room – still on the phone – to general confusion, and leaving Abel feeling incredibly awkward. Despite the fact that Jax and he tolerated each other on the best of days, Jax was still the only buffer he had between him and the club.

"The kid's right you know," Chibs said, "Jackie Boy isn't thinking about this clearly, we have to get that girl back, the IRA is nasty business, you boys know this, she's already been there for two weeks, we can't let her suffer even more."

"We don't know if they are doing anything to her," Tig said putting a hand on the table, "Maybe we should take a step back and just think about this, try and figure out what they're trying to accomplish. There's FBI in Charming and that's never a good thing – we've had ATF and CIA and DA's – this is the only government agency that hasn't come after us, so why are they doing it now?"

"Chibs is right," Happy said nodding his head slightly, "We saw what those IRA pussies do to people, we need to get that girl out of there."

"You guys realize that girl doesn't mean anything to us, right?" Bobby asked.

This time Abel's fists clenched in anger, but he bit his tongue, literally, he bit it so hard he could taste the bitter, coppery taste of his blood. He couldn't make any more waves with the club, they already didn't like him, he needed to learn to choose his battles.

"Anyone that the IRA harms," Chibs said quietly yet firmly, "Is it important to me. I will not let anyone suffer at their hands if I can do something about it."

Chibs was quickly becoming the only person in the club that Abel even remotely liked – and maybe Happy – it wasn't the fact that he was defending Cassidy, and talking about helping her, it was more about the fact that he protected his own, and he protected what he believed in.

He wasn't scared to be scared of something and yet still do something about it. He was the kind of man that Abel could actually see himself admiring.

"Ethan Zobelle, and the IRA had Gemma gang-raped," Happy pointed out, "Just to get the club's attention, do you really think they are keeping that poor girl safe and unharmed? They already shot her in the knee, so really this conversation is pointless, we _know _that they aren't above hurting her."

Who was Gemma?

And Ethan Zobelle?

Abel figured he didn't care that much, but it would be nice to know what they were talking about, though he could get the gist of the conversation.

"Point is, we need to be smart about this," Quinn said, "We need to get that girl out, but we need to make sure nothing falls back on the club."

"It will," Jax said as he entered the room again.

"What do you mean?" Tig asked sharply, "What do you know?"

"Not much," Jax admitted as Abel studied him.

He looked calmer now, more relaxed, almost reassured, and that worried Abel, because the only person he could have been talking to on that phone was someone from the IRA, and nobody from the IRA could have anything good to say.

"I talked to Cassidy."

"You did _what?_" Abel cried making sure he had heard him right, there were a lot of unspoken boundaries in this – whatever kind of relationship it was, but there was a certain boundary that was as clear as day, and that was the boundary between Cassidy and the club.

Jax didn't get to talk to Cassidy, especially not when Abel hadn't talk to her in weeks, not since that first day she had been taken. He couldn't believe that Jax had simply left the room, he hadn't even bothered to tell Abel that Cassidy was on the phone, and then he had simply blurted out that he had talked to Cassidy like it was nothing.

Abel bit his tongue again, blood flowing into his mouth once more, he was getting really tired of picking his battles, and he knew it, he wasn't going to be able to take another bomb being dropped on him, he was surprised he hadn't gone totally crazy at the words that had just escaped Jax's mouth, because truthfully, the urge to drive his fist into Jax's jaw was greater than ever.

Jax shot him a mix between an apologetic look and some other expression he couldn't decipher before continuing on like Abel hadn't said anything, "Apparently this is about me, about ruining my life, or some shit like that."

"What does that mean?"

"I don't know."

"How do you not know?" Bobby demanded, "She's our inside man, if she wants to be saved, she needs to do her fucking part."

Abel was done, he was done with all of this bullshit, and he was done with Bobby acting like he was above helping other people, like he was above all of this, like he was above Cassidy, and he was about to prove it, he had been itching to punch somebody – anybody – since this stupid meeting had begun, and he wouldn't mind settling for Bobby.

Even if he was an old man.

But Jax beat him to it, he fixed Bobby with such a cold glare that the gaze itself was more intimidating and impactful than Abel punching him ever would have been.

"If I ever hear you say something about her like that again, I swear it Bobby, I will put you through a wall." Jax said coldly, "I don't ever want to hear any kind of shit about not helping Cassidy again, she is family, and we save our family."

Abel took a step back at Jax's bold declaration, he wasn't sure what Cassidy had said to Jax, or what Jax had said to Cassidy, or how Cassidy had even managed to get on the phone with him, but what he did know was that Cassidy Somers had woven her way into Jax's life, just as easily as she had made her way into his.

He didn't know how Cassidy had managed to win Jax over so completely through a simple phone call, but what he did know was that if there was anyone who could have done it, it was Cassidy.

And he almost smiled at that, even from a thousand miles away, she was still managing to save herself, and in turn him.

"Buy the coke," Jax said turning to look at him seriously, "We're going to do whatever it takes Abel, we're getting her back, I swear it to you."

Able had half an urge to promise the same to Jax, because somehow, she had seemed to become just as important to Jax as she was to him over the space of five minutes.

"I know."

"I may not have been able to save you, but I'm going to save her."


	10. Chapter 10

Cassidy sighed as she leaned up against the wall, and wiped away a few stray tears. She needed to get up and brush her teeth, maybe even change her shirt, but she didn't have the energy, her stomach hurt from throwing up – when she had nothing to throw up, and the rest of her hurt from all the abuse her body was suffering.

"Cassidy."

"I'm coming," She replied to Scrugs with a roll of her eyes, and forced her body up, by putting one hand on the sink, and the other on the towel rack, and hoisting herself up, grabbing her crutches as she so. It was a task, brushing her teeth, and changing her shirt, all while only being able to use one leg but she managed to do so.

"What?" She asked when she finally exited the bathroom to find Scrugs standing there staring at her.

"Nothing," He shook his head moving aside so she could pass, "Abel's going to buy the drugs."

Cassidy rolled her eyes again, she didn't want to know, they didn't exactly have a good track record with drugs, and anything that involved them and Abel was something she didn't want to know about, not even for a second, "Good for him, maybe he'll bring me some."

"I don't get you," Scrugs admitted as she dropped herself onto her bed – because she had one of those, apparently this was a high-class kidnapping – and pulled the covers over her body, "One minute you're getting along with me, and the next you're snapping at me."

Cassidy and Scrugs had come to a mutual understanding of sorts after spending the past two weeks in each other's company, she didn't bother him, and in turn he didn't bother her. If she played perfect little captive, then he would play perfect captor.

Obviously the arrangement didn't always work, and Scrugs wasn't above hitting her, but she was doing the best she could with what she had to work with.

"Sorry," She sighed knowing she was being hot and cold, "Just ignore me."

"Is this about Mick?" Scrugs asked.

Cassidy resisted the urge to grab her crutches and beat Scrugs with them, if she had to hear the name 'Mick Holland' one more time she was going to go off on somebody, anybody. She had worked long and hard to get to a place in her life where she didn't think about him every day, and she would be damned if someone as stupid as Scrugs would take that away from her.

"No," She said shortly. She knew exactly what this was about, but she didn't want to talk about it. That phone call with Jax had been the only exception, she had done what she had to do, to convince him to let Abel buy the drugs.

She had done what she had to do to get out of this hell hole. She didn't want to talk about it anymore. Maybe if she ignored it, then it wouldn't be happening to her, it was a farfetched belief to hold onto, but Cassidy didn't know what she was going to do if she was sure about this.

It was easier to pretend like it wasn't happening.

"Are you sure?"

"Don't pretend like it matters to you, Scrugs," Cassidy sighed, "What is it that you want? You wouldn't be hanging around unless something is happening."

"We're going to see the Boss."

"Fine," She said getting up and grabbing her crutches, "Then let's go."

"Just like that?" He asked as she started down the hall.

"Am I going to get electrocuted if I move any closer?" Cassidy asked ignoring his question, causing him to sigh and drop to his knees to remove her anklet and toss it onto the couch. It was weird, she almost wanted him to put it back on, after two weeks she was already used to the familiar ring of metal, and felt uncomfortable without it.

"Not anymore," Scrugs said leading her out the door where two armed men fell into step with them and a black SUV pulled up. With help from Scrugs, Cassidy forced herself back into the increasingly familiar middle seat, the whole scenario was becoming all too familiar.

"Here."

Of course, there was nothing like a trip in the SUV without a cup full of drugs, she didn't even bother hesitating, she downed the contents like it was water, and felts the drowsy effects of it overtaking her body as she did so.

When she came to, Cassidy found herself sitting into what looked like an interrogation room, she was the only person there, and her crutches were nowhere to be seen, but she figured whoever had placed her there, could see her.

"Hello?" She called uncertainly. In movies the idiot who calls out is always the one who gets killed first, but she figured she was the only leverage they had at this point, so her life expectancy hadn't been severely shortened by this little field trip.

"Well hello."

The woman was old, yet she was dressed in a pair of tight jeans, a shirt that was low cut enough to make Cassidy want to gouge her eyes out, and her hair had a terrible black and blonde dye job. Overall, she looked like the definition of trash.

"You aren't Father Ashby."

"Pretty and observant, I can see why Abel picked you."

"Don't talk about Abel," Cassidy said as the woman sat down in front of her.

"Don't start that bullshit with me sweetheart, I think we both know you aren't a fighter," The woman smirked.

"So you're the Boss?" She asked raising her eyebrows, and crossing her arms over her chest uncomfortably.

"I am," She said with a smile that seriously bothered her, "But we aren't here to talk about me, or even Abel for that matter, we are here to talk about you."

"Me?"

"You."

"What do you want from me?"

This whole time the only thing that had made sense was that this whole thing had to be about Jax, and Abel, and their family, so Cassidy couldn't even fathom why this woman wanted to talk about her, she had absolutely nothing to do with anything, she was simply the leverage.

"I don't want anything from you, Cassidy, not yet anyway, we can talk about what I want when it becomes an issue."

"Then what is the point of this little meeting?"

"I want to talk about Mick Holland."

Cassidy threw her head back in frustration, and accumulating anger, _she didn't want to talk about Mick Holland. _

"No."

"We can get back to that then, I'm not in any rush, sweetheart, I've been planning this for years. Instead, we can talk about Cora, let me see, she goes by Somers these days, doesn't she?" The woman smirked again.

"She does," Cassidy said cautiously, she wasn't quite sure where this was going, and she had a feeling it was nowhere good.

"Is she still drinking?"

"Yes."

"Your mother was quite an enchanting woman in her youth."

"You know my mother?"

"Oh no," The woman shook her head, "But it wasn't hard to figure out."

"How do you figure that?"

"Enchanting women have a way of falling the hardest, they don't know what to do with themselves, or how to survive, once the enchantment wears off."

"I'd say you're speaking from experience but," Cassidy looked over the woman in an incredibly annoying way, "You don't look like you were ever an enchanting woman, probably not even a decent one."

"See that attitude might work on Eric, but it isn't going to work on me sweetheart, you aren't a fighter, you don't have a damn bone in your body that allows you to be anything but a good person, and that is going to be your downfall."

Survival Rule Number Two: Sometimes, it's better to let people underestimate you. It gives one the upper-hand.

"Who's Eric?" Cassidy asked disregarding everything else the woman had said for the time being.

"I think you call him Scrugs," The woman said absentmindedly as she drummed her fingers against the metal table that separated them, "Now why don't we talk about Mick?"

"So tell me, what is it with you and Scrugs?" Cassidy continued on like she hadn't heard what the woman asked, "Why are you both so obsessed with my downfall? Because you guys keep saying this whole thing is about Jax, yet you guys seem pretty certain that you are going to ruin my life."

"You're just collateral damage," The woman waved her hand, "Your life just holds too many pieces in this puzzle for it not to fall apart."

"Perfect," Cassidy smiled sarcastically like that actually made any sense to her, which for the record, it didn't. She still had no freaking clue what she had to do with any of this, of what her mother had to do, what Mick had to do.

None of this was adding up, not the tasks set out for the people in Charming, and not the questions she was facing here. None of it added up, it was like a million little pieces that didn't connect with each other, because there was just one missing piece.

"So let's talk about Mick," The woman's voice had turned venomous, there would be no more beating around the bush, she was going to get her answers one way or the other.

"What's there to talk about?"

"We can talk about what you did to him."

Cassidy's hands that had been resting lazily on the table in front of her dropped to her lap, where her fingernails dug into her palms, she didn't want to talk about what she had done to Mick, she had just been a kid, she had done what she thought was the only thing she could.

It was a crazy, unbelievable part of her life that sounded like it came right out of a Lifetime movie, so no they couldn't talk about what she had done to Mick.

"Or we can talk about what he did to you."

"If you know what I did to him, then you know very well what he did to me, it isn't a secret," Cassidy said coldly, "We have nothing to talk about."

"If it's not a secret, then why are you acting like it is?"

"Its public knowledge," Cassidy said in that same cold tone, "I don't go airing it around."

"Touchy," The woman smiled in an incredibly unkind way, "My patience is running real thin darlin, so now you are going to start telling me what I want to know, or you are going to take another bullet."

"Go for it." Cassidy challenged.

"Oh sweetheart, let me elaborate on that," The woman pointed her finger at Cassidy's abdomen, "That baby is going to take a bullet."

Instinctively, Cassidy's hands flashed to her stomach as she glanced up at the woman with wild eyes, "How do _you _know that?"

"Call it a gift I have, I can tell when someone's pregnant," The woman waved her hand, "And I heard your little conversation with Jax – that's how you convinced him to let Abel do that drug buy, the second he realized you were carrying his grandchild, you became family to him."

Cassidy hesitated replying to that, she knew she was taking a chance that her conversation was being tapped when she had called Jax, but somehow she had managed to convince herself that she had gotten away in the clear.

"Oh I'm not mad sweetheart, you didn't tell him anything important, in fact you helped me out, so thank you for that."

"I may not be pregnant," She said in a low tone, she didn't know for sure, she had just started showing signs of pregnancy, it could just be her body reacting to the stress of the situation, sure it was a farfetched theory but it was what she was holding on to.

"Don't worry you are, but if it makes you feel better, I'll have Eric buy you a pregnancy test on your way back."

Oh yeah, that would make her feel loads better.

"So," The woman asked dangerously, "Just how cooperative are you feeling now?"

Cassidy didn't say anything, she just nodded cautiously indicating that the woman should ask her what she wanted.

"After you did what you did to Mick, your mother took you, and she ran, did she not?"

"She did."

"And where did you go?"

"Connecticut."

"And she changed your last name to what?"

"Somers," Cassidy said in an agitated tone, "It was her maiden name."

"And your birth name is?"

Cassidy hesitated, before she allowed the name she had promised herself she would never speak again roll off her tongue, "Cassidy Holland."

"And is your father Mick Holland?"

"Yes." Cassidy said blinking quickly, "What is the point of this? All of this is public knowledge, you already know all this. So why are you making me say it?"

"Tell me what he did to you."

"You know what he did to me," She said fiercely.

"No," The woman shook her head, "I don't, it's been debated, it's been suspected, nobody knows what Mick Holland did to you, because there was never trial, there was never even an indictment, because you and your mother disappeared, and your father signed away all his rights to you. Your father was for all intents and purposes declared innocent and wrongfully accused, so no, I don't, why don't you enlighten me?"

Cassidy sighed as she ran a hand through her hair her voice growing louder, "My father was a bastard who abused my mom and I."

"How?"

"Is this seriously necessary?"

"_How_?"

"Physically," Cassidy raised her voice as the woman did, except her voice kept getting louder and louder, till she was all but screaming, "Physically, emotionally, sexually, every kind of abuse there is, my mother and I are victims of it at the hands of Mick Holland. Is there anything else you would like to know?"

"No," The woman smirked as she held up a silver recorder and clicked it off, "I think I've got it all."

Cassidy stared at the recorder with wide eyes as she sat back down in her seat, "Tell me you didn't."

Except when the woman pressed the playback and her own voice filled the air screaming about what her father had done to her, to her and mother.

She had.

"Why?" She shook her head tears brimming her eyes, "Why would you do that?"

"Your dad is doing me a favor down in Charming, and I think this recording should keep him in line, don't you?"

"No," Cassidy yelled loudly shaking her head, "You can't let him hear that, he will go after her, he will go after my mom, and he will kill her."

"Of course he won't sweetheart, unless of course I ask him too, that's the point of this recording," She said waving it in the air, "If he so much as steps a toe out of line, I'm going to turn this into his bosses, even if nobody presses charges, he will have lost his job, and he won't be able to do anything to hurt me, or my plans."

"You're a terrible person," Cassidy said quietly.

"And you're a damaged one," The woman shot back, "That's why you haven't told Abel any of that, even though he deserves to know, because you know that he won't want you anymore. Once he finds out about this, because trust me darlin, the truth always comes out, once he finds out how used, and dirty, and damaged you are, he is going leave you behind in the dust."

"And when he does that," Cassidy said her voice hoarse, "You will have lost your leverage."

"Then we'll just have to make sure he doesn't find out, won't we? At least till all this is over," The woman raised her eyebrows, "Even if it's public record, he won't be able to find out unless he knows your Mick's daughter."

"Who are you?" Cassidy called after her as the woman moved to exit the room, "Why are you doing this to me?"

"Oh sweetheart," She turned back to her, "I'm family."


	11. Chapter 11

"Ever shoot a gun, before?"

"No."

"Bullets go here, safety on, safety off, aim, trigger, shoot."

"Okay," Abel said slowly taking the gun from Jax staring at it like it was a foreign object. Which for the record it was.

"No Abel, it isn't okay, this isn't a game anymore, do you understand that? I just gave you a gun, and your about to walk into Mayan territory to buy a shit-load of coke. This isn't a game, this is serious, people are going to get hurt, and I swear I'm not going to let that be you." Jax said loudly.

"You think I don't know that?" Abel cried dropping the gun on the table, "Jax, I am so far out of my league here. Half the time I'm so angry that I turn into a fifteen year old who has absolutely no sense of reason, and the other half of the time I'm driving myself insane with all the things I don't know."

"Then do something about it," Jax said firmly, "Talk to me, Abel-"

"I can't," He cried cutting him off, "I can't because most of the time you're the one pissing me off and driving me insane!"

"Then tell me that Abel, for fucks sake I can't fix anything unless you talk to me!"

"I don't want you to fucking fix anything!"

Abel and Jax fell silent as they stared at each other, breathing heavily.

"My life," Abel said quietly, "Up till now has been pretty simple, I'm not going to say easy, because there isn't anything easy about having a mom who is terrified of the entire world, and a dad who comes home all of three times a year, but it was simple. I'm not used to being told what to do, I'm not used to anyone worrying about me, and I'm not used to anyone trying to take care of me."

"Abel," Jax said just as quietly, "I'm not trying to take care of you, I'm just trying to keep you safe."

"Is there really a difference between the two?"

"I guess not," He paused, "So then what do you need from me? What do I need to do to keep you from being angry at me?"

"Do you want an honest answer to that?"

"It would be appreciated."

"I don't know." Abel admitted, "When I look at you all I see is how much you didn't want me, and then you go on about keeping me safe, and it's just so confusing and frustrating, and the only way I can deal with it is by getting mad. And I know how I come off, but I'm not an angry person by nature, Jax, I just don't know what to do with this, with you."

Abel seriously needed a bastard-no-longer-pledge, he didn't want to be mad at Jax, and he didn't want his father to think he was a spoiled asshole who thought he was better than anybody else, and could do whatever he pleased, and act however he pleased, and maybe if he could be honest with Jax, the idea of a bastard-no-longer-pledge could actually work.

Jax was silent for a little while before he nodded to himself, "I guess you think I'm going to abandon you in the middle of all of this like I did when you were a baby."

"I'm used to being alone," Abel blinked back tears, "But I can't do this alone, Jax. I need you."

Abel nearly breathed a sigh of relief, there had been so much weight sitting on his shoulders that finally admitting that he needed Jax and was scared of that felt so good that it outweighed the embarrassment of feeling like a kid who ran to his dad for every little problem.

"Abel, kid, if you think you are ever going to get rid of me again, then you are stupider than I thought you were."

"That's so easy for you to say, Jax, but it's a lot harder for me to believe when you gave me up in the first place."

"I didn't give you up, son. At least not in the way you think I did."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean-"

"Jackie Boy," Chibs entered the room with an apologetic look on his face, "We need to go."

"Right, okay," Jax shook his head as they both broke out of their little bubble they had been in, "You know how to use that now?"

Abel nodded, grabbing the gun, and tucking it into the waistband of the back of his jeans.

"Here."

"I've got it," Abel shook his head refusing the brown envelope filled with bills, he didn't know how to do any of this, but the one thing he could do was pay for things, he didn't want the club's money, not when he could actually be useful for once.

"Here," Jax said handing Abel a set of keys, "Take my truck, your car will draw attention."

Abel nodded and seconds later he was already on the main road headed towards Mayan territory, and a few minutes after that the sound of about eight motorcycles could be heard, revving up and falling into step with him.

He smiled to himself at the both familiar and unfamiliar sound of it, it was a comforting sound, not in the sense where it let him know that Jax was right behind him should he need anything, but in the sense where it reminded him of Cassidy, and that one perfect moment that was the beginning of everything.

_Abel groaned as his phone vibrated loudly against his nightstand, if that was Nick, he was going to throw his phone out the window. Through squinted eyes he barely made out the letter 'c' before he pulled the phone up to his ear._

"_Cassie?"_

"_Come outside."_

"_What?" He asked sitting up, "It's 3:30 in the morning."_

"_Just come outside Abel, I'm waiting."_

_With that she hung up the phone causing him to stare at the phone stupidly for a second before getting up with a groan as he forced himself to get dressed. He quickly pulled on a pair of grey sweatpants and a long-sleeved white shirt, and grabbed his keys, phone, and wallet while slipping into his black high tops._

_He poked his head in his mom's room to make sure she was still sleeping, even though he knew she would be, she had taken her sleeping pills – probably more than she should have – and she wouldn't be up for hours._

_He quietly slipped out of his house and took a moment just to stare at Cassidy._

_She was dressed as lazily as him in a pair of short black sleep shorts that drove him insane – he would never understand how her legs could look like they went on forever despite the fact that she was short – and a long sleeved navy blue shirt with a pair of sneakers._

_Her hair was tied up in that messy ponytail that never seemed to stay, and she was wearing her glasses that she hated but made him want to kiss her senseless._

"_Is something wrong?" He asked making his way down the driveway._

"_No," She smiled holding out her hand, "Come on, I want to show you something."_

_Abel stared at her hand for just a second too long causing her to pull it back and blush. God, he was such a fucking idiot, he was acting like he was the girl. Why was he being such a pussy? Oh yeah because this was Cassidy Somers and two weeks ago he had kissed her over her drunk mother's body, and they hadn't talked about it ever since._

"_Where are we going?" He wondered aloud as she headed towards his car._

"_Do you want directions, or do you want me to drive?"_

"_Are you going to crash my car?"_

"_It's definitely a hazard."_

_Abel laughed and handed her the car keys without much thought, he was the one who had taught her how to drive in the first place, she had asked him to teach her a while ago, and it had never occurred to him that her mom was just too drunk to teach her._

_He hadn't thought too much into it, he never did when Cassidy asked him for something, all he thought when Cassidy asked him for something was, "How high should I jump?"_

_He got into the passenger seat of the car, as she got into the driver's seat of it. It was a weird experience, he was used to sitting on the other side with Cassidy next to him, and he was now wishing that he was the one driving because he could've sworn that there was nothing sexier than Cassidy behind the wheel of the car, and the sight was making him stare._

_She had to pull the seat forward because she was so much shorter than Abel, but there was something about the way she drove that drove him absolutely insane – though it seemed like everything this girl did drove him insane._

_She drove with one hand on top of the wheel, and the other hand had two fingers lazily strewn against the bottom of the wheel. She bit her lip when she drove like she was concentrating so completely on the task at hand, and it put dangerous thoughts in Abel's head, like reaching over and putting his hand on her thigh. There wasn't anything he wanted to do more than distract her._

_God, he was so going to hell for wanting to corrupt a girl like Cassidy Somers._

"_My dad was a jerk," Cassidy said quietly making Abel's slightly creepy staring completely justifiable now, "Think of the worst person you know, and multiply that by the biggest number you know, and you still won't understand how big of a jerk he was."_

_Abel was silent, he didn't think she was looking for an answer to that, and something told him his own daddy issues weren't even considered issues in comparison to Cassidy's._

_She pulled the car over off the side of some random dirt road just off the highway, and got out, causing Abel to do the same. And he didn't question her as they began walking down the road, instead this time – he held out his hand to her._

_And she didn't hesitate, her fingers laced through his own, and she walked one step in front of him, gently guiding him to where she wanted to go._

"_When I was a little girl, and things with my dad got really bad," She started as they started some sort of an uphill climb, "My mom used to wake me up in the middle of the night and say, 'Cricket, we're going on an adventure.'"_

"_Cricket?"_

"_I don't know where it came from," She blushed, "She's always called me that. Anyway, when things got really bad we used to come up here."_

_Abel looked around at where they had stopped, it was like a hill, but mostly it was just an extremely elevated patch of land that was completely barren and covered in dirt, and some dead grass._

_She sat down, bending her knees, and resting her elbows on them, letting her hands hang off, as she pointed to the empty highway in front of them._

"_There's this group of guys who ride their motorcycles down here, almost every night, at four in the morning," She explained as he sat down next to her, in the same position as her, making sure to keep some distance between them, "We used to come here and watch them ride, and she'd ask me what I thought of those guys. I used to tell her that I thought they were scary."_

_Cassidy laughed quietly as if the idea of being scared of them now was completely ridiculous._

"_And my mom looked at me said, 'Cricket when you get bigger, you're going to learn that sometimes, the bad guys are the ones who look like the nice guys, and the ones who look like bad guys, are the best kind of people you can find.' So we used to come here almost every other night and just watch the guys on the motorcycles and pretend like they were rushing off to my house to save us."_

"_Why did you bring me here?" He asked after she fell silent. He didn't mean it in a way where he didn't want to be here with her, he meant it in a way where he couldn't believe she would so willingly share something so personal about her life with him._

_As long as Abel could remember, Cassidy had been incredibly closed off about her family, and now in the space of two short weeks, he seemed to know the darkest secrets of her family, her completely broken and torn family, that he knew nothing yet everything about._

"_You scare me, Abel," Cassidy turning to look at him, "It terrifies me how much I want to talk to you, how much I need you, and I have never needed anyone before, never, and everything about you just terrifies me in the most beautiful, incredible, perfect way. And I want to be brave, I want to be brave with you, and I thought if I brought you to my safe place, I could be brave."_

_Abel stared at her as the sound of motorcycles filled the air, neither of them paid any mind to them, they were just background noise, right now, it was just them, two incredibly different people, who were somehow just the same._

"_Then show me," He whispered, "Show me you're brave, Cassie."_

_Her breath faltered for a second before she lifted one hand to his face, and she was getting on her knees, as her eyes flickered back and forth between his eyes and his lips. God, if he didn't want her to kiss him first, he would've kissed her by now._

_Cassidy's lips found his after a moment, slowly, tentatively, but as the motorcycle engines got louder, the kiss got deeper, it got less careful, and instead it got messy. And then Abel was on his back, with one leg propped up, with Cassidy in between his legs, her body on top of his, and her lips kissing his own feverishly._

_The kiss was brave, and it was scary, it was tentative, and it was bold, it was innocent, and it was corrupt, it was everything that Cassidy and Abel were._

_It was everything they had the chance to be._

Abel shook his head as he tried to get rid of the memory, he couldn't think about that, not right now, he needed to be focused on saving Cassidy, not on moments with her, not if he wanted to make sure they had more of them.

He pulled off into a parking lot, the club had pulled off just at the Lodi border, they wanted to be close enough to help if there was any trouble, but far enough away to not be associated with Abel, even though they were cool with the Mayans, there was no need to start anything, especially anything over drugs.

"What you want so much coke for, ese?"

Oh great, the dealer had good grammar, and a firm grip on the Spanish language. Only one of which Abel had himself.

"Throwing a party," Abel said his rehearsed answer smoothly.

"Oh yeah, am I invited? Or you won't let no wetbacks into your white boy party?"

"Nah bro," Abel shook his head, "You can come, as long as you bring some coke with you. If you come to a white boy party, you party like one."

The dealer looked him up and nodded, "Alright, ese. You got the money?"

Abel pulled out the white envelope he had stashed the money in from the back of his jeans, careful not to let the gun show, there was no need to let the guy know that he was packing, that was his business, at least for now.

He held out the money as the dealer handed out the brick. Abel played it cool acting like he saw that much coke all the time, but he had seriously underestimated how big a brick of coke was. Why would anyone even sell that much at once?

"Hey ese," The dealer said as he pulled the coke back causing Abel to keep a firm grip on the money as he tried to pull that to him as well, "You best not be planning on dealing this shit. I catch you dealing in Charming, or Lodi, or anywhere near California, and I put a bullet in you."

"Like I said," Abel said maintaining his light tone, "I'm just throwing a party, one you're invited to, feel free to show up and making sure all your coke is being used there."

"Alright," The dealer nodded looking him up and down, before pushing the coke, and taking the money from him, and thumbing through it for a few seconds, "Imma tell you again, you deal that shit, and I'm going to put a bullet in you, that's if the Sons don't get to you first."

"I got it," Abel said and then because he was a complete idiot and hadn't put his bastard-no-longer-pledge into effect yet, he winked at him, and then said, "Ese."

Whatever the dealer had to say about that got lost as the sound of sirens going off filled the air and before Abel could really register what was happening they were surrounded by cop cars, and guns.

"This is a drug bust," A man's voice called, "Put your hands where I can see them."

The dealer turned to look at him with feral eyes, and then he lunged.

He thought Abel had set him up.

Abel quickly sidestepped him as the cops rushed forward. He raised his arm and blocked off the first fist that came towards his face, and in one smooth motion, bent the dealer's arm behind his back.

It was seconds later that the cops finally pulled them apart, and pushed them each against a squad car.

"Hello Abel."

Abel's eyes widened as Agent Holland exited a squad car in a clean suit, he was so surprised by the man's appearance that he barely paid any attention to the man patting him down, he only noticed him when the cop held up the gun.

"I'm guessing you don't have a permit for this kid."

Shit.

"Illegal weapon possession, and an amount of coke in your hands to look like you were dealing," Agent Holland shook his head a light smirk playing on his face, "This isn't looking good for you."

"How do you know my name?" He asked hoarsely unconcerned at the moment with everything else, which he really should have been, because shit was about to hit the fan.

"I'm going to kill you white boy!" The dealer yelled as he was shoved into the back of a squad car, "I'm going to slit your throat!"

"I know everything about you, Abel Petrie," Agent Holland said moving behind him and handcuffing him, "You're under arrest for possession of illegal drugs with intent to sell and possession of illegal firearms. You have the right to remain silent, anything you say can and will be held against you in a court of law. You have the right to an attorney, if you can't afford one, one will be appointed for you…"

_**So I wasn't going to post this till tomorrow, but you beautiful, beautiful people left me so many incredible reviews on the last chapter, and I was so excited about this one that I had to post it. I had a couple people say they were confused, feel free to PM me, I'll answer any questions. If you guys are as incredible about reviewing, I think I can promise another new chapter tomorrow. (:**_


	12. Chapter 12

"_Do you think they let you pick your cell mate in prison?" _

_Abel rolled his eyes "We aren't going to prison, Nick."_

"_Shame," He shrugged, "We could have had fun."_

"_Oh yeah, we could have gotten gang raped together."_

"_Dude," Nick raised his eyebrows, "Don't fight the bromance."_

"_Wouldn't dare."_

"_Shouldn't we get like a phone call or something?" Nick asked._

"_Is it wrong that if we do, I want to call Matthew and tell him we totaled his car?" Abel asked._

"_About as wrong as me wanting to order a pizza with my phone call."_

_The pair laughed, they were sitting alone in a single holding cell, Abel on the floor with his back against the wall, and Nick sprawled out along the bed. He had come down from his high ages ago, yet he still couldn't find it in himself to be remorseful._

_Maybe he'd try again tomorrow._

"_I feel like we should be more worried about this."_

"_My dad's in town," Abel shrugged like that solved everything, which it kind of did._

"_Well how's your dad going to know we're in here?"_

_Abel opened his mouth to answer when a cop came in and unlocked the cell, "Petrie, Muroe, your charges have been dropped, you're free to go."_

"_Dude," Nick groaned as they exited the holding cell and entered the sheriff's station to find two people waiting for them, "She came to bail you out even after what you said? Why am I not dating Cassidy Somers?"_

_Abel resisted the urge to tell him that by morning, most likely, neither of them were going to be dating Cassidy Somers, she was more likely here to put him out on his ass._

"_Thanks Mr. P, you're an incredible man," Nick grinned as Abel's dad tossed him his car keys. If Abel wasn't so freaked out by Cassidy's presence, he would have laughed at how easily his dad had given Nick his car even after what they had done._

"_You are clean and sober right?"_

_Nick nodded, he hadn't needed any kind of courage boost to run Matthew's car into a tree, he had just done it for the hell of it, if Abel thought he didn't like the kid, he had nothing on Nick's opinion of him._

"_Alright kid, talk to your girl, then come meet me outside," His dad said before following Nick out of the station._

_Abel resisted the urge to run after his dad, his own girlfriend had never even remotely been fear-inducing, but now she was the most terrifying person on the entire planet, and she wasn't even doing anything._

_She was just standing there, his father's suit jacket draped over her shoulders covering the strapless blue dress she had been wearing for the party. Well, he had successfully ruined that. He sighed and then walked right past her and out the station, he didn't stop walking, his dad simply fell into step with him._

"_So Cassidy Somers, huh?" He smirked_

_Abel groaned good-naturedly, "Why must everyone refer to her as that?"_

"_Because it's a definition in itself, come on kid, that's the kind of girl you marry even though you don't know a damn thing about her, just because she's Cassidy Somers."_

"_Is this seriously what you want to talk about? My girlfriend? Because last time I checked, Dad, you just bailed me out of jail." Abel said pointedly._

"_I mean I got the charges dropped, and we can't talk about something that never happened." He shrugged._

"_And mom?"_

"_Is scared of her own shadow, we don't tell her anything at all." He said firmly._

_Abel nodded in understanding, "So Cassie?"_

"_I approve." His dad laughed clapping him on the shoulder, "I approve of any girl who comes to our house at two in the morning without managing to wake your mother up, and tells me you're in jail, all while laughing."_

"_She laughed?" Abel raised his eyebrows._

_His dad laughed again, "Yeah, she tried to hide how amused she was, but it wasn't working, I don't think either of you have a good sense of judgment between what is socially acceptable and what isn't."_

"_God, she's going to kill me," Abel groaned, he was feeling a little bit better knowing that he hadn't managed to ruin their night, but that didn't mean he hadn't managed to ruin their relationship, their relationship that was all of seventy-two hours old._

"_Why don't we find out?" His dad raised his eyebrows as Cassidy exited the sheriff's station, her hair tied up in its ever-present messy ponytail. In her hands, were his things, his jacket, his wallet, cell phone, and what he was assuming was Nick's things. Shit, they probably should have waited for that stuff._

"_Thanks," He said quietly taking them from her hands, and shoving his car keys back at her, he was definitely not in a position to drive._

"_You're welcome," She said just as quietly avoiding looking at him and instead turned to his dad, "Are you coming with us Mr. Petrie, or?"_

"_I'm going to go meet a friend for a drink actually, you get my boy home safe alright?"_

_Abel rolled his eyes._

"_Sure," Cassidy leaned up and sweetly kissed his dad's cheek, and handed him his suit jacket back, before getting into the front seat of Abel's car._

_He shot his dad one last 'help me' look before getting into the passenger seat of his car. Even weeks later, Abel hadn't found anything sexier than Cassidy behind the wheel of a car, and damn it, if he hadn't fucked up tonight, it would have been totally acceptable for him to put his hand on her thigh, and do a whole hell of a lot of distracting._

"_Cassie, about tonight-"_

"_I don't want to talk about it, Abel." Cassidy said firmly._

"_Cassie, we need to talk about it, the things I said to you-"_

"_Abel," She said loudly taking her eyes off the road to shoot him a totally ineffective glare, but he got the hint and quieted down as she made a left turn._

"_My house is the other way."_

"_You're staying at my house."_

_Abel looked at Cassidy like she had turned into a girl he had never seen before, Cassidy had stayed at his house before, multiple times in fact, hell she had been there last night, but Abel barely went inside of Cassidy's house, let alone spent the night there._

"_You're going to need an alibi for your mother," She said as an explanation._

"_I can stay at Nick's."_

_Cassidy pulled the car over into some random parking lot with a screech, and turned to look at him, her hand still firmly gripping the top of the wheel, "Do you want to Abel? You're acting like I'm the one who messed up tonight. So tell me what you want, and we'll do that."_

"_Cassie," He shook his head, "I have no idea what you're thinking right now, I don't want to be everywhere you look if you don't want to see me, I don't want you to think I don't understand the enormity of what I said to you tonight."_

"_Do you know how I survived my dad, Abel?" _

_Abel fell silent as she stunned him into silence, where they seriously talking about her dad right now, even after all he had said?_

"_I blocked it out Abel, I blocked out every word my father said to me." Cassidy said in an unwavering tone, "Because that's what I do, I lie to myself, and I pretend like things aren't happening to me, I run away from them. So right now, this is me running, so you can either run with me, and pretend like tonight never happened, or you can drop me off at home, and pretend like we never happened."_

"_You know," Abel said quietly as she pulled out of the parking lot, "I would follow you anywhere."_

"_No," Cassidy sniffed, "You can't say perfect things like that, not right now. You can run with me, but you have to be quiet while doing so."_

_And so Abel settled on not using words, he had never been very good at them anyway, and instead he moved his hand, and placed it gently on her thigh._

"Petrie."

Abel looked up to find Agent Holland standing outside of his holding cell a manila folder in his hand, and a key in the other.

"Let's go," He said opening the door, "You're coming with me."

"You know what?" Abel said making a show of looking around his tiny cell, "I think I'm cool here, thanks."

"Trust me Petrie, you're going to want to talk to me."

"I'm not talking to you without a lawyer." He shrugged, he wasn't a stranger to the legal system, or at least he hoped he wasn't, Cassidy was a crime show junkie, and he had sat through hours on end of Law and Order. But then again, Law and Order probably wasn't the best thing to be putting your hopes on when you were actually in prison.

"Fine, then I'll talk and you can listen," Agent Holland said and to Abel's surprise he sat down on the floor of the station so he was eye level with Abel, "Did you know you were adopted?"

"Obviously," Abel said dryly.

"Do you know what an adoption consists of?"

"Obviously," He repeated.

"Humor me."

Abel studied him for a second, and despite the fact that he wanted to flip him off, he remembered his bastard-no-longer pledge that he figured he was putting into effect now, and answered, "It's when biological parents sign away the rights to their child, and give them to somebody else."

"Exactly." Agent Holland nodded, "Now tell me this, do you know how much jail time you're looking at if you do in fact get convicted?"

Abel didn't answer that. That sounded like a question he should probably have a lawyer answer for him.

"You're eighteen Abel, you'll be tried as an adult, and if convicted – which you will be – you're looking at a life sentence in Stockton."

"I'm noticing the use of the word if," Abel said then mentally hit himself, he needed a freaking lawyer. And shouldn't he get a phone call? He could call his dad, and he'd know what to do.

"I'm not here for the Sons, I'm not here for you, I'm not even here for your old man."

"Then what are you here for?"

"The Mayans, they've been in bed with the Galindo Cartel for way too long, you shut down the Mayans, you get rid of one of the Cartel's major distributors, effectively crippling them."

Abel blinked, "Am I supposed to know what any of the means?"

"You know Abel, you've got everybody here fooled thinking you're just some dumbass kid from wherever, Connecticut, you're old man and the club may not have dug into you, but I have. I know exactly how smart you are. You know what I'm telling you."

"Yeah?" Abel raised his eyebrows, "Please enlighten me, tell me what you know about me, because obviously I don't know shit."

"I know you haven't gotten anything lower than an A in your entire life-"

"Yeah but that doesn't make me some kind of genius. That's just-"

"I know you tore your ACL and three other ligaments in your left leg and you still managed to win yourself a national championship. I know that up till four years ago your mom was one of the best lawyers in the entire country, except now she's suffering from panphobia, I know your Dad is-"

"Are you going somewhere with this?"

"I know your dad is the CEO and sole owner of the fortune 500, or multi-billion dollar company, Drew Enterprises, I know that Drew Enterprises was named after you – Drew's your middle name – I know your set to attend Yale in the fall to get an Executive MBA – you were going to go to Stanford on a full scholarship but you wanted to stay close to home with your mom – and I know that by the time you're 23, you are going to become the CEO and sole owner of Drew Enterprises."

Abel set his jaw as the man basically read him his future like he was telling him all these great things were going to happen for him, except all he could think about was why this man was so interested in him, and why he knew so much about Abel if he was here for the Mayans.

The only thing Abel had that associated him with the Mayans was what happened today, but he figured everything the man had recited to him was common knowledge, you could google his dad and know all these things.

This town was too small town for anyone to know who he was, it wasn't like he was famous or anything, he didn't appear in magazines and shit, nobody was going to care about him till he took over the company, but Drew Enterprises, was a household name, and if this town wasn't as small as it was, somebody would have put it together sooner.

Abel, was surprised it had taken them this long.

"I also know all about your girlfriend, Cassidy Somers."

"We aren't talking about her, get to the point Mick," Abel said his name mockingly, he wasn't going to talk about Cassidy with this man, especially because he did not like the tone his voice took when he said her name.

"Do you still want your lawyer?"

"Sure," Abel said sarcastically, "I'll call my mom. Just tell me what you want."

"I want to make a deal with you, Abel." Agent Holland said smoothly, "You have an incredible future ahead of you, you could be a great FBI asset in the future, and every teenager makes mistakes, right?"

"What do you want from me?" Abel asked cautiously, he had nothing to offer this guy besides money, his trust fund itself was large enough to feed a small country for at least a couple hundred years.

"I want you to tell me everything you can about the Sons, find out who they make deals with, who they talk to, what they talk about."

"The Sons are legit."

"For now," Agent Holland said like he knew something Abel didn't, "But I want to know anyways, the smallest thing can help me link the Mayans to the Galindo Cartel."

"I still don't get what the Sons have to do with anything."

"The first people to know about the illegal activities of an MC, is always the rival MC." Agent Holland smirked.

"So you want me to spy on the Sons for you?"

"Think of it more as spying on the Mayans, however more inadvertently."

"And what would I get in return?"

"Isn't it obvious? I wipe the slate clean, it'll be like today never happened, there will never be a single record of this arrest, no one will ever know, no prison, no jail, no life behind bars, oh and," Agent Holland held up the manila folder, "I'll give you this."

"What is that?"

"Haven't you ever wondered how you found yourself in the Petrie's household?"

Abel was silent for a moment as he registered those words.

"If you help me with the Mayans, I'll wipe your slate clean, and give you the truth behind your adoption. So what do you say, Abel? Do we have a deal?"

_**I know I'm a terrible person for not posting this yesterday, I fully intended to, I just couldn't get it perfect, I didn't like how it was worded, and then I just deleted it and started from scratch. I'm still not sure if I'm entirely happy with it but I wanted to put it up for you guys. So we learn a lot more about Abel in this chapter, especially about his dad! For those of you who were wondering what the point was behind Abel's arrest, this was it. Keep in mind that while Agent Holland is in cahoots with the IRA and that woman (I know we all know who she is, but just let me pretend like it's still a mystery), and obviously, Abel doesn't know that.**_


	13. Chapter 13

"_Nikolina, really?"_

"_Yes," Cassidy laughed as they walked down the emptying sidewalk, "Why is that so hard for you to believe?"_

"_Because you're Cassie, you're little Cassidy Somers."_

"_I'm all of six months younger than you, Abel Petrie, I'm not little."_

"_You're seven months younger than me, kid, and I didn't mean little in that way."_

"_I know," She smiled._

"_Seriously though, Nikolina?"_

"_Oh my god, Abel," Cassidy laughed throwing her head back slightly, "Why is that such a hard thing for you to understand?"_

"_I don't know, you've just always been Cassidy Somers, you know?"_

"_No I don't," She shook her head, "I don't get why people say my name like it's a definition."_

"_Well obviously they don't because you're name isn't even Cassidy." Abel shook his head laughing like she had cheated him out of something, "I can't believe you never told me that."_

"_I'm sorry, I didn't know it was such a big deal," She said before stopping in her tracks pretending to be worried, "Wait is this a deal breaker?"_

"_Oh yeah," Abel nodded seriously turning around to look at her, "I don't know if this whole relationship thing is going to work out Nikolina, I'm not quite sure you're my type after all."_

_Cassidy scoffed crossing her arms over her chest, "Oh yeah, and what's your type?"_

"_Smart, funny, shy, blonde," Abel moved forward grabbing her hips and folding her into him, "Green eyes, killer body, Cassie."_

"_So that means my name being Nikolina is a deal breaker," Cassidy said quietly as Abel looked at her through hooded eyes, as she crossed her wrists behind his neck, arching her back slightly._

_Abel leaned down and kissed her lips slowly, making her eyelids close slowly as she allowed herself to fall under the spell that was Abel Petrie._

"_Total deal-breaker," He whispered pulling away just to kiss her again, "But I think you can change my mind."_

"_Yeah?" Cassidy raised her eyebrows as he tightened his arms around her waist, "Right here on this sidewalk?"_

"_Shit," Abel muttered pulling away as they both remembered they weren't exactly in the most private of places, "Come on."_

"_Where are we going?" Cassidy asked as he took her hand and they set off down the sidewalk again._

"_There's something I want to do."_

'_Something I want to do' had turned out to be breaking into the soccer fields – though she wasn't too sure if it really was a break in considering Abel's family owned the place._

"_Come on," He said pulling her towards the locker rooms._

_She grasped his hand between both of her hands as she looked around wide-eyed. She had been on these fields a thousand times, one of her favorite places in the world was the metal stands that made you numb after sitting on them too long._

_There was something really perfect about watching Abel on the soccer field. He loved it, maybe more than anything else in the world, and though she knew her opinion was biased, she had no doubt that once day he was going to go pro. _

_She loved the look on his face, the look of upmost concentration filled with raw passion, as he did the one thing that truly made him happy. Abel had a lot of things, and he was blessed in a lot of ways, but Cassidy knew just how restless he was._

_Maybe that's why he was so drawn to soccer, despite his laidback personality. It was something that made sense, it was something for him to do, something that didn't feel like there was something missing._

_Except then the accident had happened, and everything Abel had worked for had gone up into flames. They hadn't so much as talked about what he was going to do in the future, let alone step on the soccer fields._

_And now he was leading her into the locker rooms, into the player's area, with the laidback confidence that defined Abel, as if this wasn't something out of the ordinary, as if this was something they did every day, and maybe it was once, but it hadn't been, not for a year._

"_So this is where you come after you get all dirty and sweaty," Cassidy teased trying not to let her tension bleed out, as she sat down on the metal bench not unlike the stands at the fields._

_Abel grinned as he pulled off the leather jacket he was wearing and then the black shirt he had been wearing under it, and tossed it on Cassidy's head._

"_Wouldn't you like to know?" _

_If she wasn't so distracted by the perfectly sculpted muscles that were currently flexing in front of her face as Abel pulled on his soccer jersey that he hadn't worn in a year, she might have gone ahead and admitted, that yes, she really, really would like to know._

_Cassidy blinked in surprise as Abel suddenly leaned down to envelope her lips into his own, but then relaxed into the kiss._

"_Come on," Abel said grabbing her hand once more, and a soccer ball and leading the way down the hallway._

"_What are we doing?"_

"_Do you remember that I promise I made you when we first met?"_

_Cassidy grasped at straws for a second before understanding enveloped her, "You're going to teach me how to play soccer?"_

"_Come on," He repeated leading her to the middle of the field and dropping the soccer ball before backing up about twelve feet away from her, "Alright now kick it, with the side of your foot, lightly."_

_Cassidy glanced up at Abel with a hesitant expression, he was acting like nothing strange was happening, like this was totally normal, and she wasn't too sure if she should say something or go along with his behavior._

_She shot him a small smile when he nodded encouragingly at her, before leaning down and pulling her heels off – something she should have done a while ago – and tossing them to the side. She hiked up her dress – because she had been brilliant enough to wear a tight one – and kicked it with her left foot, and watched as it rolled a good distance to Abel's left._

"_That was good," He laughed as he ran towards the ball, "Maybe next time a little less toe, and a little more straight."_

"_Oh like you could have done it any better."_

_Abel raised his eyebrows at her, and then in almost a lazy motion, he pulled back his right foot, and neatly sailed the ball right over to her feet._

"_You're supposed to put your foot on the top of it, love. That's called trapping." He teased as she dropped to her knees and stopped the ball with her hands._

"_Well I'm a goalie," She defended herself poorly._

"_Come on goalie, try again."_

_It took a while but soon the pair were kicking the ball back and forth smoothly. There were a few times when the ball moved of course thanks to Cassidy, but for the most part they had fallen into a perfect little rhythm._

_Kick. Trap. Pass. Kick. Trap. Pass._

"_So why do you hate your name?"_

"_I don't hate my name," Cassidy said slowly._

"_Yeah you do," He laughed, "I could see it on your face every single time I said Nikolina."_

"_I just don't like you saying it," She replied kicking the ball emphasizing on the word 'you,' "I never said I didn't like my first name."_

"_And why's that?"_

"_Because I'm your Cassie, and that's it." Cassidy said louder than she had intended to._

_Abel trapped the ball as a goofy grin crossed his features, "My Cassie, huh?"_

"_Yes," She said in a grumpy tone, "Yours. Now kick me the ball."_

"_Where did Cassidy come from anyway?"_

"_It's my middle name," She explained._

"_Hmm," Abel smiled thoughtfully finally kicking her the ball, "Nikolina Cassidy Somers."_

_Cassidy didn't correct him out loud as she neatly trapped the ball, maybe she would be goalie, but in her head her real name was dancing through her mind, as she desperately tried to shake it off by kicking the ball harder than she had meant to._

_Nikolina Cassidy Holland._

_Kick. Trap. Pass. Kick. Trap. Pass._

_Nikolina Cassidy Holland._

_Kick. Trap. Pass. Kick. Trap. Pass._

_Nikolina Cassidy Holland._

"_I don't get it."_

"_Get what?"_

"_Why do parents name their kid one thing, just to go and call them by something else? Like I get making Nikolina into something like Nikki, that's one thing but why would you name your kid William, and then call him Bob?"_

_Cassidy considered the question for a second as she kicked the ball over to Abel, honestly she wasn't too sure, because her answer probably wasn't the same as the other kids, she hadn't changed her name by choice. Though looking back now, she couldn't imagine herself going by anything other than Cassidy._

_She couldn't imagine being anyone but Cassidy Somers. There was this thing about names that Cassidy had learned to appreciate a long time ago, while people spoke her name like it was a definition, the thing was, it was a definition._

_To her, everybody's name was a definition, they defined who they are, they identified the person they were, at their core, the person that they were, couldn't be defined with any logical word, there were no words in the dictionary that could ever encompass the complexity of the human soul, so she believed that the only true words to define people, were by their names._

"_Once," Cassidy said quietly as she trapped the ball, not looking at Abel, "A long time ago, I was Nikki, but I'm not that girl anymore. I'm not Nikki, Nikki was scared and she was alone, and for her the world was a terrible place. And now I'm Cassidy and I'm still scared, and a lot of the time I'm still alone, but I'm happy, and the world seems to open up for me, and it's nice to be somebody different then who I was."_

_She didn't expect Abel to understand what she was saying, but maybe he did, because when she kicked the ball back to him, he spoke just as silently as she had._

"_I keep waiting for something to happen you know? Something that makes me feel, I don't know, alive. I have things I want to do Cassie, after seventeen years, I have plans, places I want to see, fields I want to play on, and I don't know if I can do that if I'm being CEO of Drew Enterprises, and attending stockholder briefings and board meetings."_

_Cassidy sighed as she sat down on the grass, and Abel moved to sit in front of her._

"_I guess we have some decisions to make, don't we?"_

_Abel nodded slowly, "I think there's a lot of things we need to think about."_

"_But it's a 'we', right?" Cassidy asked cautiously._

_Abel leaned forward to kiss her briefly, "Yes, stupid. It's a 'we', it's been 'we' for two years now."_

"_I know that," Cassidy nodded picking at a blade of grass, "But this is different Abel, we're going to start our senior year, you already have scholarships lined up, and I don't even know what I want to do. I don't have dreams Abel, I know that sounds insane but I don't. I don't like thinking about the future, I live in the now. I never really thought about graduating, because the idea that it was going to happen was so foreign to me."_

"_So why are you thinking about it now?"_

_This time it was Cassidy giving Abel the 'you're stupid' look._

"_Because of me," He said answering his own question._

"_I love you, Abel, and I want to spend the rest of my life loving you," She said quietly as she ripped at the blade of glass, "But past that I have no idea what I want. For me, everything starts and ends with you."_

"_And that scares you." He didn't ask her, he simply stated it, because he already knew, he had probably known before she did._

"_I don't think I know how to live without you anymore," Cassidy admitted, "And I'm seventeen, and we can make all the plans and decisions as 'we' all we want, but at the end of the day, we have more of a chance of making it with someone else years from now than we ever will with each other."_

"_Oh Cassie, always the optimist," He mused quietly tucking a lock of her hair behind her ear causing her to lean into his touch, "Do you honestly think I know how to live without you?"_

"_I think you definitely have a better shot at it than me."_

"_Close your eyes, Cass."_

"_What?"_

"_Just do it."_

_Cassidy sighed but closed her eyes, and waited for him to say whatever it was that he wanted to._

"_Think about dying-"_

"_What?"_

"_Would you shut your eyes and shut up?"_

_Cassidy sighed again but once more shut her eyes._

"_Think about dying, just for a second, Cassie, think about everything you could have possible done with your life, think about everything that you could possibly leave behind. Is there not a single thing you want to leave behind, not a single thing you want to be remembered by? You want to know what your future is, whatever you're thinking about is your future, and that's what you do with your life Cassie, you make that future happen."_

_And just for a brief second Cassidy let the images flash through her mind. Flashes of a family, of a house, of Abel, of happiness. That was all she wanted, there was nothing she wanted more than to marry this boy, and make a home with him, to make a family with him, to raise his kids, to have his kids._

_And the image was so incredibly perfect that it terrified her. They were seventeen, she was seventeen, and all she wanted was a family. That wasn't normal, that couldn't be normal. _

_So instead of telling Abel about her terrifying fairytale, she forced her eyes open, and she kissed him so fiercely that he forgot what they had been talking about in the first place._

Cassidy closed her eyes as her body fell to the ground from the impact of the punch sent to her jaw, sometimes Cassidy forgot the survival rules, but it was impossible to forget basic human instinct, and she was sure that her hands darting forward to catch her was the only thing that kept her from hitting her head against the granite counter.

"Stop it!" Abel's voice filled the air as the faceless man landed a blow to Cassidy's back with his foot. Seconds sooner and he would have gotten her stomach, but she hadn't been thinking about a thing other than that baby since she had taken that positive pregnancy test, and she had the foresight to turn over.

"Take your own advice Abel," Father Ashby said as the man landed yet another blow to Cassidy's back making her cry out in pain, "Stop it, stop her pain, all you have to do is make the deal."

"Why do you want me to make the deal with the FBI agent?" He cried over the phone as the man hauled Cassidy's body in the air as her eyes widened.

What FBI agent?

"Isn't it obvious son? You need to keep that agent away from all of this, if any government official finds out about this, I put another bullet in her. Keep your friends close, and your enemies closer."

"So you want me to feed Agent Holland false intel?"

Agent _who?_

"Obviously."

"And what exactly do you want me to tell the Sons?"

"You don't tell them anything, your Da doesn't know about this, nor does your Ma. This is your task, for your knowledge only. And for your old lady's sake, I'd heed that."

"Nikolina," Cassidy screamed loudly as she realized that Father Ashby was about to hang up, "Nikolina Holland!"

"What? Cassie, I don't know who that is? Why are-"

Abel's voice was cut off as Father Ashby turned off the phone quickly and turned to glare at her with a deadly expression.

"_What have you done?"_

"Abel, will never make a deal with Agent Holland," Cassidy said in just of a deadly tone, "Not once he knows the truth. Not once he knows what he's done to me."

"What on earth do you have to do with Agent Holland?"

Cassidy blinked confused before she realized something, whatever that woman had going on with her father, Father Ashby didn't know, which meant that the IRA really thought that the FBI was looking into this case – and not looking into her and Abel.

Which had the potential to be both a terrible and a beautiful mistake.

"Nothing," She shook her head, "Absolutely nothing."

"Take her downstairs."

"Father Ashby," Scrugs stepped forward from where he had been standing at the doorway, his eyes averted to the floor – Cassidy had a growing suspicion, that she was starting to grow on the guy for some unexplainable reason, "We were told to take care of her, to keep her safe and happy."

"That was while she was cooperating, Ms. Somers doesn't seem to be so happy on doing that anymore, so take her downstairs, Eric. I won't ask again."

Cassidy ignored Scrug's apologetic look as he tossed her over his shoulder, and let herself hang there like deadweight.

She couldn't think of anything they could do to her that was any worse than Abel finding out the truth about what she had done all those years ago.

She couldn't think of anything they could do to her that was any worse than Abel finding out the truth about her father.

_**I'm sorry that this chapter is such a filler chapter, and not much happens, but I had to write it, to set up the next chapter, which I promise is the chapter that you are all waiting for (yes I'm talking about Jax, and Abel, and a certain conversation about a certain adoption)! It's when shit really starts to hit the fan, or at least the way I have it written in my head now is. Please review, they motivate me, and help me write the chapters faster, and put them out for you. (:**_


	14. Chapter 14

_**Eight year-old shoots father fifteen times**_

_By: Derek Monroe_

_Los Angeles Times_

_**Earlier this afternoon, eight-year old Nikolina Holland picked up a gun that was sitting on a table in the backyard of her family home, pointed the gun at her father, Mick Holland, and shot him a total of fifteen times.**_

_**The eight-year-old who had been home alone with her father at the time, attracted the attention of the neighbors who immediately called the authorities before rushing over to the house, and taking the gun from Nikolina.**_

_**The mother, Cora Holland, arrived on the scene just before the police did, and arrived at San Luis Obispo General in the ambulance with both her daughter and her husband. Cora did arrive with a busted lip and a broken arm – though both injuries were caused by a fall down the stairs a few weeks earlier.**_

_**Nikolina, herself, seemed unharmed despite a plethora of bruises, and a cut on her cheek that is reported to be from the kickback of the gun. **_

_**Holland has been taken out of surgery and has been transferred to the ICU, where he is reported to be stable but not out of the woods.**_

_**While the police are still investigating, the general consensus so far seems to be leaning towards both domestic and child abuse. Both Nikolina and Cora have been treated at numerous walk in clinics, and hospitals for numerous injuries, for various unexplainable accidents and falls.**_

_**After all, I'm not sure what kind of handgun has a kickback, but the kickback from any kind of gun definitely doesn't cut into a little girl's cheek that deeply.**_

_**While there is no clear evidence pointing to Holland as being abusive – Cora has claimed that they are not living in a violent household, her daughter's actions seem to be telling a different story.**_

_**Holland is a federal officer and if indicted, will lose his job, though at that point, that may not be the largest of his worries.**_

_**While no clear action has been taking, eye witnesses have been saying that social services, police, and lawyers are at the hospital, and an anonymous source has come forward stating that they had heard little Nikolina say, "Why don't Daddy die? I shoot him lots of times."**_

_**From this side of the story, this case seems pretty cut and dry, Holland is an abusive man, and Cora is a battered woman – who couldn't protect her daughter – leaving Nikolina to take a stand and protect both herself and her mom.**_

_**However, there are many more factors we must consider, especially Holland's status as a federal officer, and Nikolina's age. Despite the little girl's bravery, she is still a minor, and her mother – who seems to have no intention of filling charges for domestic violence – will have sway over her story, and what she says.**_

_**Also, Holland is a federal officer who is highly revered, known for closing cases quickly and quietly, he has numerous key players on his side if social services tries to push the case including the full support of the police, the FBI, judges, and every person he has ever helped.**_

_**So while the guilty party is obvious, it is more likely than not, that Holland is going to walk.**_

_**So from me personally, and everyone here at the Los Angeles Times, here's to the little girl whose parents failed her, whose justice system is about to fail her, and whose whole life was over before it started. Here's to the little warrior who tried to save the world.**_

Abel closed his eyes as he slowly crumpled the newspaper print-out he had in his hand, the tears were hot, and heavy, they burned his eyelids as he shut them both trying to keep them in his eyes, and trying to get them out.

"_Eight year old Nikolina Holland shoots her father fifteen times."_

God, how could he have been so goddamn stupid? There was a reason her mother was drunk all the time, there was a reason that Cassidy had a bad habit of running from every single problem she encountered, there was a reason that she was so closed off to him at first, there was a reason she avoided the topic of her father so much, there was a reason she never made plans. There was a goddamn reason.

"_Why don't Daddy die? I shoot him lots of times."_

There was a reason she had forgiven him so easily that night when he had been so high out of his mind that he had told her that he could so clearly see why her father had never wanted her. There was a reason she had forgiven him so easily when he had shoved her up against that wall so roughly that he could hear her head bang against the wall. There was a reason she had forgiven him so easily when he had simply walked away from her with Nick like nothing had even happened. There was a goddamn reason.

"_Both Nikolina and Cora have been treated at numerous walk in clinics, and hospitals for numerous injuries, for various unexplainable accidents and falls."_

It's because she had been trained too. She had been trained to like she was a dog, you do something bad, you get kicked, you do something someone else doesn't like, you get punched. You keep your mouth shut, and maybe someone will show you some kind of kindness. She had been trained to forgive the unforgivable.

"_Here's to the little girl whose parents failed her."_

Abel pushed open his car door, his movements jerky, and hurried, as he raced past the picnic tables, and through the doors of the clubhouse, down the hall and into the room that he knew was Jax's. If he hadn't known it would have been confirmed by the fact that Jax and Tara were lying on the bed. Or rather they had been, now they were standing up at his appearance. But he didn't pay any mind to them. He rushed towards the bathroom, and pushed open the door, crouched down, and threw up everything he had in his stomach.

"_Here's to the little girl whose justice system failed her."_

Abel ignored the sounds of his name that escaped both Tara and Jax's lips, he barely heard them, he barely heard anything over the overpowering words that screamed into his mind in that asshole's voice. It was overpowered by the image of a tiny little blonde girl, who picked up a gun, who was determined not to hurt anymore, who didn't want to be sad anymore, and tried to end the pain.

"_Here's to the little warrior who tried to save the world."_

"I can't," He sobbed, "Oh god, I can't, I don't."

He couldn't find the words, and he couldn't stop the sobs that he had been holding in since the night she had been taken. He just couldn't do anything anymore, so he let himself fall into Tara – or maybe it was Jax's embrace – they both felt the same – just as strong, just as warm, just as comforting, just as safe.

And the thought only caused Abel to lunge forward and throw up again. Who had kept Cassidy safe? Who had kept her warm? Who had comforted her? Who had stood up for that little blonde haired girl named Nikki, who took beating after beating, who cried tears after tears? Who had protected her?

"_Holland is an abusive man, and Cora is a battered woman – who couldn't protect her daughter – leaving Nikolina to take a stand and protect both herself and her mom."_

"I don't-" He tried again but lost himself to his own sobs that were so heart-wrenching that he couldn't even identify them as his own.

His hands blindly searched for another – Jax's. He knew it instantly from the bulky rings that encased tough hands, and he managed to shove the newspaper article into his hand.

God he wanted to claw at his skin. He wanted to claw at his skin, and his DNA, and every part of him and just give it to Cassidy as an offering, to give it to her so he could beg for forgiveness, so that he could try and erase every bad thing he had ever done to her, he had ever said to her, so he could take back every tear he had ever made her cry. But he couldn't, he wouldn't, because he didn't want her forgiveness.

Because he didn't know any more if she was forgiving him because she really did, or if she was forgiving him because she was too scared to do anything else. But more than that, he didn't think he'd ever know if he truly deserved to be forgiven ever again, not when she could forgive anything.

"_Nikolina, herself, seemed unharmed despite a plethora of bruises, and a cut on her cheek that is reported to be from the kickback of the gun."_

Somewhere from somewhere far away Jax was yelling his name, and Tara was telling him to calm down, but he couldn't, he wouldn't, they didn't understand, and he was trying so hard to make them understand, but he couldn't get the words out of his mouth.

"Cassie," He sobbed, "Nikki."

"_Here's to the little girl whose life was over before it started."_

Strong arms yanked him away from the toilet bowl, he wasn't throwing up anymore, he was just clutching it like it was all he had to hold onto, like it was the only thing that was keeping him sane, though he wasn't even sure he was sane anymore, and pulled him into a strong chest.

And as if he was a little boy, Abel buried his head in Jax's shoulder, and fisted his shirt between his hands, and he continued to sob. He cried to his father like he had never gotten to do with his dad, he cried for the little girl who had been taken, and he cried for the little girl that had become a strong woman and still had been taken, he cried for everything that Nikki would never be, and he cried for everything that Cassidy had become.

"_Despite the little girl's bravery, she is still a minor, and her mother – who seems to have no intention of filling charges for domestic violence – will have sway over her story, and what she says."_

"I don't want Cassie to die alone," Abel finally managed to get out as he continued the break down that had never stopped. Nikki had died alone, she had died all by herself in a cruel world where no one had stood up for her, in a world where nobody had ever fought for her, in a world where all she had to protect herself was herself.

"_Here's to the little warrior who tried to save the world."_

And that was the crux of the matter, Abel didn't want Cassidy to die alone, Nikki had died alone without a person in the world who gave a damn about her, and he would be damned if Cassidy died the same way. They had to get her out of there, they had to get her out of there so Abel could tell her he loved her, so he could tell her that she was beautiful, so that he could tell her that she was the most incredible person he had ever met, so he could tell her that she was important to someone – that she was the most important thing to him, but most of all, he wanted to tell her that she had someone fighting for her, that she would always, always have someone in her corner.

"_Here's to the little warrior who tried to save the world."_

"Dad," Abel sobbed pulling away so he could try and look at Jax despite the fact that his tears blurred his vision, "Dad, I'm so scared."

"I know," He said placing a hand on the back of his head as his forehead placed itself back against his shoulder blade, "I know buddy."

He didn't know why but at that moment he realized something, his dad would have told him to man up, to save the day, and call it day, there was no room for being scared in his family, his mom had enough fear in her tiny body for an entire country, Abel didn't get to be scared, he didn't get to be anything less than a man.

"_Here's to the little warrior who tried to save the world."_

"We're going to figure it out, okay?" He said fiercely, "We're going to figure it out, Abel, one day at a time. She isn't going to hurt again, not like this."

"You don't know that, Dad."

"No I don't, but what I do know is you're going to fix her. You're going to find her and you're going to fix her, you're going to fix every bit of damage anyone has ever done to her, you're going to kiss her, and you're going to hug her, and you're going to love her."

"But what if we don't find her?"

"We will, damn it Abel, I promise we will find her."

"How can you know that?"

"Because I found you, Abel."

"What?"

"Look at me," Jax said pulling away again and holding his face tightly so they identical blue eyes met each other, "I didn't want to tell you like this, I spent a long time trying to decide if I should tell you at all, but I'm going to okay, because you need to hear me, you need to hear this. So you need to promise me you're listening to me right now, I need you to promise you're hearing me."

Abel nodded as he desperately tried to find the deep breaths that would calm his down, his eyes searched the tiny bathroom frantically till he found the gentle green eyes that had danced in and out of his dreams for as long as he could remembered. Till he had found the peace that had comforted him for as long as he could remember.

Who had comforted Cassidy?

"_Here's to the little warrior who tried to save the world."_

When Tara's soft hands were encased in his own, her wedding rings digging into the palm of his hand, he forced his eyes back to Jax's and he waited.

"Abel, you were kidnapped, and I found you."

"_Here's to the little warrior who tried to save the world."_

_**So just in case anyone was wondering this is my favorite chapter in this story, and I am so unbelievably proud of it, and if you never review on another chapter of this story again, it will be okay, as long as you review on this one.**_


	15. Chapter 15

"You know you're going to have to face them at some point?"

Abel grabbed a pillow from the bed he was moping on and tossed it at the door, and pumped his fist in the air triumphantly when he heard the sound of the weapon making contact with his little brother.

"You are literally the most bipolar person I know."

"Good," Abel muttered giving him the finger.

"Why won't you just go talk to them?"

"Have you ever been kidnapped?" Abel asked sitting up to glare at his brother, "Because if you haven't been kidnapped then you don't get an opinion."

Thomas sighed as he leaned against the doorway his face more serious than Abel had ever seen it – not that Abel spent that much time with Thomas in the first place. Come to think of it, Abel had been staying with the Teller's for weeks now and he barely ever saw Thomas – not that he was around all that much either.

"What do you do all day?" He asked furrowing his eyebrows.

Thomas stared at him like he was insane and then shrugged, "I got to school, I hang out with my friends."

"Where do you sleep?"

"Here, a friend's house, Alena's house, whatever I'm feeling that day."

"Wait a second, I thought Alena Rincon doesn't know you exist?"

"Trust me," Thomas smirked, "Alena Rincon knows I exist."

Abel laughed and resisted the urge to give his brother a pat on the back, he had seen Alena Rincon, and while he loved his girlfriend, and there wasn't a single person he was attracted to more than her, he was going to give it to Thomas – Alena Rincon was sex on legs.

"And you haven't told Jax and Tara?"

"Let me tell you something about Tara Knowles-Teller, young grasshopper, there isn't a single person on this planet that is more protective than her. You do not tell Tara Knowles-Teller about the girl you're sleeping with. You don't even tell her about the girl you're dating. You tell her once you're engaged."

"So I'm guessing she's not relationship material?"

Thomas shook his head with a laugh as he sat down, "Now that I've educated you on our mother, I'll educate you on Alena. Alena Rincon dances on tables. Alena Rincon always drinks straight out of the bottle. Alena Rincon doesn't take anything seriously. Alena Rincon has too much damn life in her to settle down in a town like Charming."

"Haven't you ever thought about it?" Abel asked leaning forward resting his elbows against his knees, "Getting out of Charming, I mean?"

He was quiet for a moment as if trying to figure out the answer for himself.

"There are times when I see Alena, and she's dancing on a table barefoot – she hates shoes – and she's holding this bottle of tequila – drinking straight out of it – and she has her head thrown back, and she's laughing, and drinking, and she's living, even in a small ass town like this one she's living," Thomas said with a small smile on his face, "So yeah, sometimes when I look at Alena and I see her dancing on that table, I think about going somewhere where nobody knows who I am, going somewhere where I can dance on tables and drink straight out of a bottle."

Abel smiled, he understand the underlying meaning behind those words, and just like with every single conversation he had with the guy, he felt like they were brothers more and more, "She dances on tables."

Thomas nodded with a small laugh, "She's dances on tables, bro."

"Do you love her?"

"I don't know," He admitted, "But I know that my favorite thing in the world is to watch her dance on tables, I know that I don't have plans to sleep with anyone else, I know that my favorite mornings are the mornings she heats us up Hot Pockets and thinks she's the shit because of it."

"That sounds dangerously close to love."

"Maybe," Thomas nodded, "But she isn't ready for love."

"Cassie shot her father fifteen times," Abel offered like it was something you just threw out at the dinner table – Thomas seemed to have that effect on people, he was too easygoing, too laidback, for anyone to really feel anything different around him.

"What a badass."

"Here's to the little warrior that tried to save the world," Abel muttered. He wasn't sure what it was about that line – maybe it was the fact that it described Cassidy so perfectly, or maybe it was because right now it described their entire situation perfectly, but it had stuck with him, and it was probably never going to leave him alone.

"You know," Thomas said looking around, "This room used to be your damn shrine."

"My shrine?"

"I grew up knowing about you," Thomas nodded slowly to himself, "My big brother who was kidnapped and then given up, it was hard not to know about you. Even when she didn't know you, you were always Mom's favorite-"

"Thomas," Abel interrupted ready to tell him that wasn't true, and even if it was, there was no way he was her favorite now.

"You are," He said firmly, "And that's okay, honestly, it's never really bothered me. You're her favorite, you're her Abel, the survivor."

"I'm not a survivor. Thomas."

"Aren't you?" He raised his eyebrows, "You're birth mom was a junkie whore, you were born with your insides fucked up, a hole in your heart, and then you went and got yourself kidnapped, and somehow you still have what seems like the most incredible girlfriend, parents waiting for you at home, and colleges busting their asses trying to get you to go there, you are the epitome of a survivor, Abel. You're the story people tell other people when they need hope."

"I was a kid, a baby," Abel said uncomfortably, "None of that was me, I don't remember it. I didn't do anything all that exceptional."

"It doesn't matter," Thomas shrugged, "Abel, you gave Mom something to believe in, you were the one thing she did right, even after all the shit that happened, giving you up, getting you out of Charming, to her, you're her biggest accomplishment."

"Look how well that turned out," Abel muttered.

"That's not on her."

"I never said it was."

"But you do blame her."

Abel sighed as he ran a hand through his hair, "I don't blame her, I don't blame anybody."

"Nobody goes through the shit that you have and doesn't blame anybody."

"That's the thing isn't it? I don't know shit, Thomas. You know more about the truth of my life then I do. How do I blame anyone, if I don't feel like I went through anything, before this?"

"Why is it so hard for you to admit that you blame Mom and Dad for everything happening now?"

Abel tucked his lips into his mouth for a brief second as he tried to find an answer to that, "I blamed Jax – not Tara. I blamed Jax, and I was cruel, and I was harsh, and I blamed him at the beginning of all this, but now? Now I'm just tired, man, I don't have it in me to blame anybody, not while I'm missing her. I only have energy for one or the other, and honestly, I'd rather use my energy on her, than Jax."

"You love her." Thomas said pointing out the obvious.

"More than anything," He said easily.

"How did you know? That she was worth all this?" Thomas asked waving his hand in a general circle.

"First of all, I got her into all of this, however inadvertently, not the other way around," Abel pointed out, "And to answer that question, let me ask you one. Let's say Alena came here right now, and she asked you to get in a car, and drive her somewhere. Somewhere far away, away from Charming, away from all of this, just you and her, would you get in the car?"

"I don't know."

"Because you don't know if she'll be enough," Abel said, "And when you can finally tell yourself that she isn't enough, that's when you know."

"That makes absolutely no sense, you just said you need to know if she's enough, but you only love her when she isn't."

Abel tried to find the right words to explain his thought process, he wasn't sure when he became the kind of person to hand out advice, let alone to the little brother he had never known he had, but he was trying to do his best.

"Here's the thing, when somebody is enough, Thomas, that's great. They're enough to get you through a really bad night, and to be the mother of your kid, and to make you dinner at night, and share a bed with."

"That sound's good enough to me."

"Exactly," Abel said in an 'aha' moment, "It's good enough. But when you're really in love, when you found your girl, Thomas, she won't just be good enough anymore, she'll be everything. She'll be the only thing you can't live without, she's your sanity, she's your peace, and she's the one person who makes you want to shoot yourself. Suddenly, you're the one who wants kids because you can't think of anything more beautiful than that girl barefoot and pregnant, and you're the one who wants to settle down, because damn it, she's your girl, and what's the point of waiting after that. And she makes you talk about her to your little brother like a goddamn pussy."

Thomas laughed as Abel did, god this was getting way too fucking Hallmark for him.

"You said you wanted kids?"

"Sure," Abel nodded, "Eventually, not anytime soon though."

"So if you were Jax, and this was your kid, how would you feel if you told him that he was kidnapped, only to have him walk out of the room and proceed to ignore you and his mom for the rest of the day?" Thomas asked pointedly.

The little shit was sneaky.

Abel sighed as he glanced at the door that was already shut, "You better keep your goddamn mouth shut about this."

"Hey," Thomas said holding up his hands in surrender.

"I called Jax, Dad," Abel admitted.

"And that's why you walked out?" Thomas raised his eyebrows, "Because you called your dad, Dad?"

"He's not my Dad, Thomas," He sighed, Abel was getting seriously tired of trying to explain the difference between his parents ad Jax and Tara to people, especially when the difference was getting harder and harder for him to see, "He didn't raise me."

"From what I can tell, your dad or whatever, didn't do much raising either."

"Maybe not," Abel agreed, "Doesn't make him any less my father."

"Same as the fact that Jax giving you up doesn't make him any less your father."

"My father, yes, my dad, no."

"Alright I'm still failing to see how the fact that you called Jax, Dad, is more important than him telling you that you were being kidnapped."

"Maybe I'm just getting accustomed to kidnappings," Abel shrugged, "Maybe I don't feel kidnapped. Maybe I'm just confused. Half the time Jax is the worst thing that's ever happened to me, and the other half he's the only thing that's holding me together."

Thomas laughed, a loud laugh that carried through the house, as he threw his head back, his whole body shaking with laughter, as he wiped at his tears – because apparently the little shit thought whatever he had said was funny as fuck.

"You're such an asshole, Abel. What the fuck do you think a parent is? They're the worst thing that's ever happened to you, and they're the only thing that holds you together."

Abel threw another pillow at his brother.

"Next time I see you, we are going drinking. I'm not cut out for this deep conversation thing, especially not with a little shit like you."

"Done," Thomas said once he had calmed down, "After I say one last thing."

Abel waited.

"Up until last year, this room was a nursery, it was your nursery, Abel. I meant it when I said it was your shrine. Your name was on that wall in stupid cutouts, and the walls were blue with this ugly ass lining, and there was a sofa, and a rocking chair, and it was your goddamn shrine."

"Why are you telling me this?"

"Because I meant it when I said you were Tara's biggest accomplishment, but you were also the worst thing that's ever happened to her. She chose to love you, she chose to be your mom, and then she chose to let you have a better life than what you could have had in Charming, she chose to give you the fucking world. So I get that the idea of you somehow having the ability to love Jax like a dad terrifies you, and I get that I will never be able to get what you are feeling. But what I do know is that I listened to my mom cry for you, for years, I watched my dad walk in this room and just sit in the middle of the floor like he had no idea what to do with himself – he'd just stare at your name. I know that if you had stayed here, you would have burned Abel, SAMCRO nearly killed us all, they burned trying to get the club legit, so you owe them this much. They got you out of here before you burned, Abel, so you owe them this much, you owe them the chance to explain themselves."

Abel closed his eyes as he took his brother's words in, and then finally stood up, and made his way towards the door, before he turned back to Thomas.

"You don't resent them do you? Or even me? I got out, they kept me from burning, but they kept you."

"No, Abel, I don't," Thomas shook his head, "They've been legit since I was six years old, I barely remember a time when they weren't. Besides a car accident when I was baby, I've never hurt Abel, not because of the club."

"In that case I won't feel bad about saying this to you," Abel said grabbing the doorknob, "I agree that I owe them this conversation if they really did save me from all the shit that I think you're implying here. But, they aren't my saviors, Thomas, if there is one thing I've learned from all of this, your past always catches up to you. Maybe I wasn't burning them, but I'm burning now, Thomas, and trust me, it's even worse than anything you can imagine."

"I believe that," He nodded as Abel moved to walk away, "But if you make my mom cry again, I swear Abel, I will kick your fucking ass."

Abel laughed softly, because closing the door behind him, and walking towards the kitchen where Jax and Tara somehow always seemed to be gathered.

They were seated at the kitchen table, a cup of what looked like coffee in front of them both, but they turned to look at him when he walked in.

"I want to hear what you have to say," He said quietly, "And I know it was an asshole move to just walk out like that but I had some shit I needed to think through."

"We get that," Tara said softly.

"Today I found out my girlfriend spent her childhood years being someone's punching bag and worse, I had the most meaningful and horrifying conversation I have ever had in my entire life with Thomas, and I called you Dad after crying into your arms and throwing up like a little bitch," Abel said looking at Jax, "I'm confused, and I'm tired, and I'm pissed off, and I seem to be freakishly in tune with my emotions. But like I said I want to hear what you have to say, at least I think I do, but I need you to answer one question for me first."

"Alright."

"If today hadn't happened, if I hadn't stormed in there like a little bitch, if I hadn't called you dad, if I hadn't told you how scared I was, if I hadn't told you about Cassie, would you have ever told me about my kidnapping?"

"No."

Abel closed his eyes, and nodded to himself before walking around the room and planting himself in the seat between Jax and Tara, "Have at it."

"Do you know what gun-running is?"

Abel gave Jax the 'are you kidding me' look.

"No, I mean do you really understand what it is?"

"It's when you sell guns."

"It's not just selling guns, Abel," Jax sighed running a hand through his hair, "Its messy and dangerous shit. You were eight months old when you got taken, and we were in so deep that sometimes I still wonder how we got out. We bought our guns from the IRA-"

"Wait a second you were in bed with the IRA?" Abel said backtracking, "I know that they have something against you, but I didn't think you had ties to them."

"I don't, not anymore, or at least I didn't."

"Didn't," Abel asked slowly before he realized the answer on his own, "The guns you sold to the Niners, you bought them from the IRA."

"More like they were delivered to us, but yes."

"But that was a onetime thing wasn't it?" Abel nearly cringed his voice sounded desperate even to himself.

Jax glanced at Tara for a second before shaking his head, "The deal was we keep running guns for them, and they make sure Cassidy's knee heals – or at least it's healed enough that someday she'll be able to walk again. Pain meds, anti-infection pills, crutches, the works."

"Why would you do that?" Abel said the tears burning hot in his eyes for the second time that day – though this time he didn't let them fall, "They're terrorists."

"And she's your old lady."

"I don't know what an old lady is." He muttered as he closed his eyes hoping the action would make his tears go away. God what the hell was he thinking? He knew when he had first gotten here that he was so angry that he couldn't see straight, so overwhelmed, but to force the club to make ties with a terrorist organization after they had worked so hard to get out of it all?

He was torn between wanting to throw up again, or beg Jax for forgiveness.

"It's a club's girl – I guess it just sounds like a less loose term for girlfriend." Tara tried to explain despite the fact that Abel decided he didn't care, that wasn't what was important right now.

"I'm sorry," He said awkwardly, "For putting you in this position."

"Son," Jax said firmly, "If we both started apologizing to each other for the positions we put one another in, we'd be here all night, so just don't worry about it."

"I wish you would've told me," Abel admitted, "You know after I stopped being an asshole."

"You're my kid Abel, I'm not going to tell you things that I know will worry you."

"Since we're going with full disclosure right now, I'm just going to go ahead and say that yeah I'm your kid, but at the same time I'm not, and I'm sorry but right now, when my girlfriend is probably reliving her childhood, that can't be your excuse for things, not anymore," Abel said firmly, "I get that you want to protect me, but you haven't been protecting me my entire life, you gave me a life where I didn't need protection, so from this moment on if it has anything to do with Cassie, even remotely, you at least have to let me know, before you do it."

"Look at you hotshot," Jax smirked but then nodded seriously, "Alright, you got it."

"So is this why the IRA took Cassie? Because they're still mad about you not selling their guns?"

"No," Jax shook his head, "We made a clean break with the IRA, no hard feelings, no love lost. I don't know why they're targeting us."

"Perfect," Abel said dryly.

"That about sums it up," Jax said the same tone, "Eventually the fact that we were buying guns from the Irish got caught up on this ATF bitch's radar, she was hunting for Jimmy O' Phelan."

"Should that name mean something to me?"

"I'm really glad it doesn't." Tara muttered.

"He was an IRA shot caller back then."

"Back in the good old days?"

"Shut up," Jax laughed as some of the tension lessened, "You have to get more than anything Stahl was a bitch, she didn't care who she hurt in the process, she got what she wanted. The bitch killed her own girlfriend to cover up her own tracks."

"Nothing says I love you like a bullet to the chest." Tara rolled her eyes.

"Would you like to find out, sweetheart?"

"I will shoot you with your own gun, Jackson Teller."

"It's good to know that you guys are so happy together."

"We are happy!" Tara snapped.

Abel didn't doubt it, their threats were empty and playful, Jax couldn't get rid of the look of adoration that he whenever he looked at Tara, and Tara didn't look away from Jax period – at least never for more than a few seconds – he had noticed that if Jax was in the room, Tara was watching him with a content smile playing at her lips.

He was almost positive a conversation about his kidnapping shouldn't be so casual – though he probably shouldn't have felt casual about it – except it was, and he did. It felt right, and after feeling so lost without Cassie, well who was he to refuse something that felt right.

"Speak for yourself."

"Really?" Tara smirked, "Because I remember you being particularly happy this morning when I-"

"Okay whoa," Abel said holding up hands, "I think I'd rather be kidnapped again then listen to you finish that sentence."

"Right," Jax said getting serious again, "We got our guns from the IRA, and the two members we dealt with were Cameron and Edmund Hayes. Chibs gave up Edmund's location to keep his wife and his daughter safe from Jimmy-"

"So he was a rat?"

Jax considered the question, "Technically yes, but when it comes to Stahl nobody was held to their actions – hell I made a deal with her."

"You did?" Abel asked almost hopefully, maybe if his deal had worked out with this Stahl bitch, then his deal with Holland could actually work, he needed those charges dropped.

The only problem was Abel knew if he was even within a mile of the guy he would shoot him fifteen more times.

"Eventually I told the club about it, but yes, I made a deal with her when I was looking for you."

"I guess kids do have a way of making the unforgivable, forgivable." Abel mused and then frowned at the odd look Jax was giving him, "What?"

"Nothing," He shook his head, "You ever think about kids?"

"Thomas asked me that," Abel said slowly finding the coincidence odd, "Sure, one day, a long time from now. When I'm ready, I'd want a rugrat or two."

Jax gave him another odd look before shaking it off, "When Chibs made the deal with Stahl, he told her where Edmund Hayes safe house was. I'm not sure what went down between the two but it ended up with Edmund dead."

"Shit."

"Yeah," He nodded, "Thing is Stahl basically killed him in cold blood, she wouldn't have had much of a defense."

"And that wasn't something that she was going down for." Abel figured.

"No, so a couple hours later Edmund's girlfriend Polly showed up and found Edmund dead."

"Where was Stahl?"

"Hiding. The thing was a woman named Gemma was following Polly. Polly thought Gemma killed Edmund – which is what I'm guessing gave Stahl the idea – but basically Gemma killed Polly, and then Stahl framed Gemma for both their murders."

"This is too many women with serious issues," Abel groaned, "Is there a shorter version of this, because the more people you throw in, the more confused I get."

"Long story short, Gemma is your crazy grandmother, Cameron thought she killed his kid, so he kidnapped you as retaliation."

"See," Abel said pointing at Tara, "That's how you tell a story."

"It's seriously fucking weird that you aren't messed up over this."

Abel sighed, "I guess it's just what I told Thomas. I don't feel kidnapped."

"What does being kidnapped feel like?"

"I don't know I was pretty shitty at it." Abel shrugged.

"It could have been a more pleasurable experience." Tara mused.

"You've been kidnapped?" Abel raised his eyebrows as Tara.

"I prefer the term taken or hostage – much more badass – but yes," She rolled her eyes, "I was pregnant with Thomas, too."

"Wait," Abel said realizing something as he got serious again, "You said a man named Cameron kidnapped me, so then how did I end up with my parents?"

Jax looked uncomfortable for a moment before sighing, "Cameron was Real IRA, so he took you back to Ireland, to a woman named Maureen Ashby – she was the woman your grandfather loved. She had strong ties to the IRA and the Sons. Her brother took you-"

"Father Kellan Ashby," He sighed running a hand through his hair, "Shit."

"He took you to a, shit," Jax muttered cutting himself off.

"He took you," Tara said in a controlled tone that somehow made it sound all the more pissed off, "To a god damn baby factory."

"They bought me," Abel said in a dull tone, "My parents bought me like I was a pair of shoes."

"They're good people, Abel." Jax said quietly.

"You think I don't know that?" He asked harshly.

"So I let you go."

"Just like that," He laughed without any humor, "You let me go like I was a pair of shoes, and my parents bought me like I was."

"That wasn't how it happened," Tara said quietly.

"Then tell me."

He wasn't even sure what could surprise him anymore, everything was a lie, his entire life was a lie. Everything he believed in, everything that made him who he was, it was all just a lie, he was the product of a lie that had started eighteen years ago, and was coming back to kill him now.

"I love you, Abel, and back then, before Thomas was born, you were the most important person in the world, you were the one thing I did right, Abel, back then, I was selfish and I screwed up everything I touched, but I had to do right by you," Jax explained, "You were something I did right. I did whatever it took to get you back, and then I saw you that day with your parents, and they were good people, Abel. They were the best kind of people there were-"

"And you got that from what?" Abel said sarcastically, "The way they paid for a baby like it was a goddamn brothel?"

"You know your parents are good people-"

"I don't know what I know anymore."

"Wait," Tara called as he stood up grabbing his car keys that were resting on the kitchen counter, "Abel, just listen to us."

He didn't reply, he was tired of listening, he was tired of everybody knowing more about him than he did, he was tired of ruining people's lives, he was tired of being someone that people fought so damn hard for just to turn out to be well him.

He was tired, and he was pissed off, and he didn't want to listen.

"Abel," She yelled loudly grabbing his arm.

"_What?_" He yelled back and then softened his expression, "I told Thomas I wouldn't make you cry."

"I just, Abel, your dad thought he was making the right decision, and it took me awhile to agree with him, but then so much shit went down, and I just, I was so glad that you were somewhere safe. I know you're angry with us-"

"I'm not angry with you," He interrupted her, god what was it with these people?

"You're not?" She asked confused.

"Tara, I'm not angry with you, or with Jax, I don't blame anybody or anything, I'm just pissed off in general. This is a lot to take in for one day."

"Then just come inside, Abel," Tara said hopefully, "We'll talk it through, figure it out together."

"We can't," He said giving her a sad smile, "I have to go."

"Where?" She asked as he gently pulled his hand out of her grip.

Abel hesitated, he knew how badly his next words would hurt Tara, he know how she would see it, she would see it as him choosing someone else over her, but he needed to go, it was something he had to do.

"I'm going home Tara, I'm going home to see my mom."


	16. Chapter 16

Abel stared at the house. It was a widespread two story house with its own private security on top of the security that was in the actual neighborhood. This was his house, the house he had grown up in, he threw parties in, broke things in.

He had learned to play soccer on the extensive front yard, he had snuck Cassidy into there through the windows, he had sat on the roof with her, this was his home.

Even now, even after Jax and Tara, after Thomas, after Charming, this was still the only place that he could think of when he thought of home, when he thought of safety, and comfort, and love, this was what he thought of.

He could remember chasing after his mom – while he was still little and she was still healthy – and clutching at her hand with his two little ones asking question upon question. He could remember climbing up on the counters despite the amount of times his mom told him not to, he could remember being happy here, even now, after everything, he felt a kind of happiness he hadn't felt in weeks as he stared at his house.

This was home. The woman inside biting her nails – steps away from a heart attack – was home. And that was what made this hurt all the more.

How did something that was such a huge lie, turn into something so beautiful? His life, his life that had been so incredibly happy, had been happy because of a lie. It was all a lie, a lie with the most gratifying of outcomes.

It was the age old question, did the end justify the means?

Maybe it did, he decided, but it didn't mean it sucked any less.

With that he put his car in reverse, and turned right back around. He would come back, he would come back and see his mother, but right now, he couldn't face her, he didn't know if he could even be angry if he saw her again, or if he would be so furious that he would be the thing terrifying her for once.

And even after all that she had lied to him about, Abel would never be able to scare his mom, that was the one thing he would never be able to do, the woman spent her entire existence living in fear, and he wasn't ever going to add to that – not more than he already had.

Instead, he went to another house. One just as familiar if not more.

He got out of the car, and didn't even bother knocking, grabbing the set of keys that had been sitting in his glove compartment, he unlocked the door, and wasn't the least surprised by the sight. He sighed as he carefully stepped through the mess, and walked into the kitchen, and grabbed the trash bags over the sink.

He smirked despite himself as he looked at the kitchen table – him and Cassidy had had a _very in depth _conversation on that table before – again not one of their classier moments.

Abel started in the kitchen, he was already there, and didn't even bother glancing at what he was touching, if it was on the floor it went in the trash, he was careful to avoid the few places where Cora hadn't made it to a sink or bathroom before she had thrown up.

Shit, the house was mess, he figured that's what happened when Cassidy wasn't home to clean up after her mother. He made a mental note to make sure Cora was still breathing before he left.

It was a rhythmic experience, it left little room for him to think when his actions were so robotic. Pick it up. Put it in the trash bag. Repeat. He worked his way through the one story house, and confirmed that Cassidy's mother was in fact alive when he picked up her room.

He grabbed the many trash bags he had filled and began filling the bin so he could put it out. And people said rich kids never did anything.

"Cricket?"

Abel turned to find Cora standing at the bottom of the stairs wearing a robe that looked way too much like Cassidy's for the experience to be comfortable, "It's just me."

"Oh Abel," Cora said not surprised by his presence but rather Cassidy's lack of it, "Where's Cassidy?"

Abel hesitated before nodding towards the kitchen, "How about I make you some coffee?"

"Okay," She agreed easily, "I've got a hangover anyway."

Abel nodded to himself, as they walked into the kitchen and he busied himself with making her drink. Everything about Cassidy's family made so much sense to him now, Mick had fucked up his entire family, but he had fucked up Cora to the extent where the only time the woman could find any semblance of happiness was in the bottom of a bottle.

There was time when Abel used to resent the woman, he couldn't understand why Cassidy spent her time mothering the woman who should have been mothering her, he couldn't understand how she had put up with it without a single complaint, until now. Who were they, who was anyone, to begrudge a woman like Cora any kind of happiness, if she wasn't hurting anybody?

"Cassie told me about her father," Abel said carefully.

Perhaps it wasn't a good idea to bring it up to her, but he wasn't sure if she could handle the news about Cassidy, not when she was so far gone already, he was trying to test the waters, he knew that while the right thing to do was tell Cora, logically he also knew that that may not be the best idea.

He knew that Cora loved her daughter, but she also wasn't capable of taking care of anyone, including herself, and right now, she had to find a way to keep herself alive till he could find Cassidy. But more than that Cora was unstable and unpredictable, he couldn't have her messing anything up on a whim.

Cora stiffened, "She told you everything?"

"A few days ago," He said letting the white lie easily escape his lips, "It was a confession long time coming."

Cora sighed as she stood up and walked towards the wine cooler and pulled out a bottle of whiskey. She pulled off the top in a practiced movement and Abel watched with fascination as she downed nearly half the bottle in one go.

That had to be some kind of record.

He glanced at the coffee in his hand, he was assuming that was his now.

"My husband was a selfish, egotistical, bastard of a human being," Cora said pointing a finger at him as she took another swig of her drink, "And he was scary, and angry, and he was charming, and you can't blame me from being too scared of him to get my kid out."

Abel didn't reply, he wasn't sure he was meant to, this was completely unchartered territory, and he figured the best way to get out of this minimally scathed was to keep his mouth shut. He didn't blame her, how do you blame a battered woman? He blamed Mick, he had seen first-hand the kind of man he was – he bullied you into getting the things he wanted.

"I knew you know," She said as she opened another bottle – okay, that was a record, she had literally just opened the first one – and took a drink, "I watched him sneak into Cricket's room once he finished with me, I knew, but what was I supposed to do."

Abel clenched his fist, and bit his tongue, you were supposed to fight for your kid. It was one thing not to blame her for the situation, she hadn't intended to marry an abusive man – at least that's what he was telling himself – but it was also a choice to sit back and do absolutely nothing when he targeted your kid.

"And then she went and she shot her dad," Cora laughed – ever the happy drunk, "She was such a perfect little girl, you know? Beautiful, funny, all smiles, she was quick-to-laugh, quick-to-protect. Kids are like that, all resilient."

She drew out the word 'all' and said it in a perky tone as she waved the bottle around, and despite the obvious differences between Cora and Cassidy, there was something about the action that reminded him of Cassidy, and it took all he had not to get up and walk out.

There were moments when the anger took over so much of his mind, or he could let his thoughts be taken over by Jax or Tara, or every single problem in his life, when he could just try and forgot for just one damn moment that she was gone, but it was always there, in the back of his mind.

Cassidy was gone. His Cassie was gone.

"I need to go," He said standing up abruptly, he had sympathy for this woman, but he couldn't look at anymore, her dark features contrasted Cassidy's so fiercely yet all he could see was her, her smile, her laugh, her.

"Wait," She chased after him, "Where's Cricket?"

Abel clenched the doorknob tightly, forced a smile onto his face and turned to look at Cora, "She's been feeling a little off about not knowing what she wants to do with herself, she still isn't sure what college she wants to go to, or what she wants to major in, and so I took her to the lake house. We've been staying there."

"Oh," Cora frowned to herself as if it surprised her that Cassidy hadn't asked her permission – if she was actually at the lake house – but then thinking again, she was probably surprised that Cassidy just hadn't told her, Abel was sure that Cassidy hadn't asked for permission to do anything in her life, well, ever, "When are you guys coming back? What are you doing here?"

"I'm checking in on my mom, Cassie was a little worn out, so I said I'd check in on you too," Abel lied easily as he pulled open the door, "Bye Ms. Somers."

He left the house feeling a slight sense of relief partly from being away from someone who reminded him both nothing off Cassidy and too much of her, and second, from the visit itself.

He had been so caught up with everything that was happening with Charming that it almost felt like the rest of the world had ceased to exist, yet it was always still there in the back of his mind, he had responsibilities here, Cassidy had responsibilities here, and those things didn't just stop existing because Cassidy was gone.

It was an unconceivable notion to him that things still happened when Cassidy was gone, but it did. People still went to work, cars still drove down the street, the world didn't stop spinning on its axis just because she was gone – nobody cared.

It was a terrible thought, but it was also the terrible truth, there was nobody in the world who cared that Cassidy was gone besides him.

"Oh god," Katy breathed as he dropped his car keys in the familiar bowl on the familiar carved table that was pushed up against the hall that was too big to be considered to be a hallway, "Oh god."

"Hey Ma," He whispered wrapping his arms tightly around her waist, picking her up slightly, and burying his head in her neck like he used to do when he was kid, breathing in her familiar smell – he was never sure what the exact smell was – he just knew that whatever it was it felt like home.

He wasn't sure how long they stood in the hallway like that but by the time they finally pulled away his mom had dried tears caked over her face, and he had managed to blink back his own tears that had been threatening to fall.

"Look at you." She whispered cupping her face in her hands, "You look different."

"How so?" He frowned.

"You look tired."

Abel laughed despite everything, "Go figure."

"How's our girl?" She asked frowning.

Abel sighed, "She's hanging in there."

"And you?" She asked leading him into the kitchen by his hand, "How are you?"

"I'm okay," He lied sinking into his seat at the kitchen table – it felt nice knowing that that was his. In Charming, he felt like a stranger in Jax and Tara's home, logically, he knew that they were family, and that he had even lived there once, but this was home.

This was his seat he had dinner in every night, that was his counter that he used to sit on eating some sort of snack while talking to his mom after coming from his school, that was his room upstairs that he slept in every night, that was his couch that he watched soccer games from, this was his home.

There was nothing to be shy about, there was never any need to be cautious, or scared. It was just home.

"What are you parents like?" She asked carefully as she pulled out some sort of spaghetti dish from the fridge and began heating it up, even if he wasn't hungry, he wouldn't have dared refuse, his mom was the kind of woman that believed a happy person was a full person.

"My _birth _parents," Abel emphasized, "Are well my birth parents."

"Do you like them? You're staying with them aren't you?"

It was easy, first walking into the home, and seeing his mom for the first time in a month, to forget that he was in fact here for a reason, that he had driven here out of anger, that he had something he wanted to say, that there was a whole hell of a lot of things to stay.

"So how much?" Abel asked as she sat the plate of food in front of him, and then slid into the seat in front of him.

"What?" She asked confused as she drew her legs up on the seat, tearing at a napkin in a habit that she had picked up when she first start showing signs of panphobia.

Abel stabbed at a piece of chicken and chewed it before he answered, "How much did I cost, Mom?"

She froze as he twirled a piece of spaghetti, "What are you talking about, Abel?"

"I mean my car was like what, 80,000 dollars? Was I worth more than that or less?" He asked waving his fork in the air sarcastically, "What about that painting? You bought that an auction didn't you? You paid a million for that. Tell me Ma, am I a million dollar baby?"

"Abel, you have no idea what you're talking about," She said in a shaky tone as she grabbed at another paper napkin.

"I mean we're not really talking about much," Abel shrugged before his voice hardened, "It's just a simple question, I just want to know how much I was worth? How much was my life worth to you?"

"5 million dollars."

Abel turned around to find his dad standing there a briefcase in his hand, his suit pressed to perfection, his sunglasses tucked into his shirt, that for once had the tie loosened letting Abel know that he actually had plans to stick around for once.

"Congratulations son, you're a five million dollar baby."

Abel nodded considering the statistics, "You'd have to get someone to make papers for me – ones that would pass any kind of scrutiny – that has to take money. I'm still trying to figure out how you managed to get me social security. You'd have to make it look like the adoption was legal, you'd have to get some kind of papers that show Jax and Tara gave up their legal rights to me. You'd have to pay people off that know that truth, not to mention how much a perfect baby would cost."

"Abel, sweetheart, it wasn't like that-"

"Wasn't it, Mom?" Abel asked standing up, "I was the picture perfect baby. Caucasian, blonde hair, blue eyes, perfectly healthy, with past problems in health. I was the miracle, picture perfect baby. You got to show that you didn't run away from a baby that could have heart or organ problems, yet you still got the perfect baby."

"Yes, the perfect baby!" She said standing up clawing at her arms with her nails, "My baby! You were my baby the moment I looked at you!"

"No!" Abel scoffed, "I was Tara's baby the moment she looked at me, I was hers!"

"How can you even say that?"

"How can I say that? _How can I say that?_" Abel yelled slamming the fork onto the table making his mom scream, "She chose me! She chose me when I was dying! She chose me when she thought I would never be hers! But you, I am only yours because you bought me! You made your _possession, _not your choice!"

"That's enough, Abel," His dad said over him, "You're scaring her."

Abel gritted his teeth and clenched his fists but nevertheless he shut his mouth, and crossed his arms over his chest, and waited.

"I'm always scared, Mark." She whispered running a hand through her hair, "I'm always scared."

"Do you know why you're so scared, Mom?" Abel said quietly shaking his head, "Do you know why you went from the most powerful lawyer, the most successful lawyer in the entire damn country to this woman who's scared of her own damn shadow? It's because you bought a baby, you bought a baby that was stolen out of his crib, you bought a baby that wasn't yours to buy, you bought a baby that was loved, and you turned that baby into me."

"And this doesn't change who you are, Abel," Mark stepped forward, "This does not change anything."

"Is that what you've been telling yourself, to justify what you did? That I am still who I am."

"That doesn't make any sense Abel!" Katy shook her head quickly – like a child – clutching at her hair.

"If I had never been kidnapped, no even if that had happened, if you had never bought me, my life would be so different. Maybe I'd be riding a bike wearing a leather vest that says prospect on it right now, or maybe I'd still be a soccer player who's just graduated from high school who has a bedroom the size of a shoe closet, maybe I'd be a loser kid in serious need of a haircut, but I wouldn't be everything that I am," He said fiercely, "I wouldn't be this person if you hadn't bought me."

"You act like we did something terrible!" Mark yelled, "You act like we damned you, we saved you, you are our son and we protected you Abel Petrie, you are my son, and you are who you were meant to be, and that is all there is to this."

"No," Abel shook his head moving closer towards his dad, "This isn't all there is to it. Do you want to know why? Because of Cassie, because of Nick, because of Maisie, because of Seth, because of Sean, because of every person that has ever been part of my life. Do you realize that none of this would have happened if you hadn't bought a baby?"

"None of what?"

Abel laughed angrily, "Don't worry about it, Dad. Just in case you were wondering, since nobody seems to have taught you this, you can't buy everything."

"You have no idea what you are getting yourself into."

"I was his son," Abel cried hoarsely, "I was somebody's son, and you just, you just took me away."

"Don't talk to me like I broke into your birth parent's house that day, don't talk to me like I'm the one who kidnapped you!"

"No, you just involved yourself with baby trafficking. You just became an accessory to kidnap."

"I didn't know you were kidnapped!" Mark yelled as Katy screamed again.

"Maybe not at first, but you knew eventually, I've been racking my brains trying to figure out why you were so cool with the fact that I was arrested, how quickly you bailed me out, how you made it all go away," Abel said shaking his head, "It's because if you had gotten there just a second later they would have taken my fingerprints, and my fingerprints would flag a missing child, my fingerprints are Abel Teller's. No one ever legally gave up their rights to me, I was flagged a missing child, I'm in the system as a missing child, but really I don't exist – Abel Petrie doesn't exist."

"I just wanted a baby, okay?" Katy screamed loudly, "I just wanted a baby, and the adoption process wasn't moving along, we'd been waiting for a baby for three years, Abel, three years. And I wasn't getting pregnant, and surrogacy wasn't an option, and I wanted a baby!"

"Well you got one," He said bitterly, "All this that is happening right now, this is what you set into motion eighteen years ago, this is what you've done."

"And you're fixing it!"

"I'm a kid, Mom! I'm an eighteen year old kid who can kick a ball across a soccer field, and run ridiculously fast. If you wanted I could run Drew Enterprises right now, I could run a multi-billion dollar company, what I can't do, is save the world. I'm a kid, I'm a sheltered kid who has never done anything, and right now I'm trying to fix the damage that you two created."

"Would either of you tell me what's going on?" Mark cried banging his suitcase on the kitchen table.

Katy looked at Abel with wide eyes, of course, he was the one who had to figure out what to tell him, he had to fix this.

"I was arrested last week, for possession of an illegal firearm and possession with the intent to sell of cocaine."

"_You were what?"_

"Don't worry, Dad," Abel smiled bitterly, "I fixed it, I'm making it go away."

"How?"

"I made a deal with the devil."

"Did they take your prints?"

"What?" Abel turned to look at his mom.

"Did they take your prints?"

"Yes."

"Shit," Mark cursed.

Abel's mom nodded looking more like herself for the first time in four years, "They have no case, Abel."

"What are you talking about?" Abel frowned.

They had a case, they had a case so solid, that Abel had agreed to spy on the Sons for Agent Holland, they had a deal so solid that Agent Holland had let him out jail as soon as he agreed to the terms of their deal, and they had a case so solid against him, that Abel had betrayed the girl he loved by working with the man she hated.

"The charges, they're against Abel Petrie."

"That's my name." He said dryly.

"But it's not, you said it yourself, Abel, you don't exist," Katy said crossing her arms over her chest, and Abel was reminded of watching his mom in court, she was a rock star in the courtroom, she never lost, "You're Abel Teller, you're parents are legally Jax Teller and Tara Knowles-Teller, you are not Abel Petrie, they have no case if you are not the person the charges against. You can't charge a person who doesn't exist. They have no case, whatsoever."

"Except there's a problem," Mark said recognizing something in her voice.

"They have no case against you, Abel. However, Abel Teller was fingerprinted, Abel Teller is no longer missing. Abel Teller was found-"

"Which means they don't have a case against me," Abel realized, "However they do have a case against you guys, they have a kidnapping case, they have a whole baby trafficking ring if this blows up."

"But that's the thing isn't it?" Katy pointed at him, "Why hasn't it blown up? Why aren't there people busting down our doors? Your prints were taken a week ago, why hasn't anything happened? Why isn't anyone looking for Abel Teller and his kidnappers?"

"Because either they never put my prints in the system, or somebody covered up this entire thing."


	17. Chapter 17

Abel slouched low into the wooden seat at the kitchen table in the Teller house, this was easily the most awkward, most uncomfortable moment of his entire life, this is what he imagined kids whose parents gave them the sex talk felt like, except he wasn't receiving a sex talk instead he was sitting at table in the Teller house with Jax, Tara, and Thomas – who was shooting him a death glare, which was surprisingly terrifying – and him and his mom on the other side.

He had told her, had told his mom that she wouldn't be welcome in Charming, that he didn't want her in Charming, but either the crazy woman was going even crazier, or it was like she was under some curse for the past four years that Abel had broken a week ago when he found out that his parents had bought him, and she suddenly wanted to be a mom again, or maybe she just wanted to be a rock star lawyer again.

"You can't be here." Jax said finally.

"Look Jackson, I know that this is hard for you-"

"No I mean you can't be here, you being here, changes everything, makes this a whole new shit show. You can not stay in Charming, not while Cassidy's life is on the line. We do whatever the Irish say without deviating from their script, and your presence in Charming is a deviation if I have ever seen one."

"Don't act like you care about Cassidy," Katy said sharply, "Don't act like you know enough about her to find her."

"She didn't run away smartass, it doesn't matter whether we know Cassidy or not," Tara rolled her eyes, "She was kidnapped, I believe you have some expertise in the area."

Well, if he was wondering where he got his attitude from.

"I don't, I am however Abel's mom-"

"Oh I'm sorry," Tara interrupted pointing between him and his mom, "Here we were thinking you were Cassidy's mom."

"Are you insinuating I don't care about her?" Katy crossed her arms over her chest.

"First of all, I don't insinuate anything, if I had something to say, I'd say it, and second, I'm telling you that there is no correlation to the fact that you are Abel's mom and the fact that Cassidy was kidnapped, unless of course there is."

"Are you accusing me of being part of this whole hostage situation?"

"I'm accusing you of being annoying, and a waste of my time. So unless you have anything important to say, I'd really appreciate it if you got the hell out of my house." Tara said firmly.

"Alright, enough," Jax interrupted as Abel's mom went to open her mouth, "What do you want lady?"

"You filed a police report when Abel was taken, didn't you?"

"Of course we did."

"That means he was flagged as a missing child, and since he was never found – not legally anyway – he is still flagged as a missing child."

"Okay, so what does that mean?"

"It means first of all, the charges against Abel can't be pursued there is no case, that means his deal with the FBI agent isn't something that he needs to keep."

"That's good," Tara said then look at Jax, "That's good right?"

"In theory," He said slowly, he had been in the life from the moment he was born, nothing good ever came without something bad, it was just the way the world worked.

"He was fingerprinted at the station that means the police should have known immediately that he was Abel Teller."

"Was being the key word."

"Would you let me finish?" Katy snapped.

"I don't like you," Tara said bluntly and childishly, and in a manner so unlike her that Abel smiled into his lap.

"Great, I don't like you either. The point is-"

"There's a mole in the police station." Jax interrupted, "Shit, that's why Abel was arrested, they knew he was going to be there, that's why they said they would know if we tried to contact the police, they have a goddamn mole."

"Okay, but can we be realistic here, Jax? I haven't met a single person who has walked into that sheriff's station and hasn't been even slightly in someone's pocket. That's just the way Charming works, it could be anyone."

"It's Agent Holland."

Tara turned her gaze onto him, "And how do you know that?"

"Because its obvious," He shrugged, "He's the one who arrested me, he was the one who just so happened to know everything about me, he was the one who took my fingerprints, and he's Cassie's father."

"Which," Katy said drawing out the word, "Means that this may not just be about Abel, this could be just as much about Cassidy as it is about Abel."

"It's not about Abel," Jax argued, "It's about me, Agent Holland is just a complication."

"So let's get rid of him."

Jax slowly turned to Tara with an uncertain look, "Babe?"

"Not like that, Jackson," Tara said, "Why does everything have to involve murder with you?"

"Can you stay focused?" Katy snapped.

"Sure, Agent Holland is a mole that is covering up Abel's kidnapping and we are trying to figure out why."

"Oh great so you're caught up."

"I'm very quick on my feet," Tara smiled widely in a manner that was completely sarcastic.

"Yeah? Is that how you managed to lose a baby?"

"Mom!" Abel cried over Jax and Thomas, "Outside now."

"No, I'm-"

Abel didn't bother listening to the rest of her protests, he simply grabbed her by her upper arm and dragged her out of the house, and onto the front steps.

"Abel Petrie, I'm your mother, you don't ever grab me like that."

"Abel Teller," He nearly spat, "You want to play dirty, you want to be a rock star again, then I can play dirty to. If you aren't going to act like my mom, then you don't get to be my mom."

"Sorry son, it doesn't work that way."

"Actually, for me it does," He laughed bitterly, "Because you see I seem to just have a whole bucket full of mother's just waiting to take your place."

"That's enough."

"That's what I'm saying."

Katy sighed running a hand through her hair, "That woman thinks she's your mother."

"That woman's name is Tara, and she is my mother." Abel said firmly, "I need you to leave."

"You're picking her?" She asked incredulously crossing her arms over her chest, "You're picking her over me?"

"I'm not choosing anyone," Abel cried loudly making her jump, "I am so in over my head, this is not our world Mom, so get in your car, and get the hell out of Charming. I didn't want you here in the first place. I told you not to come, I begged you not to come."

"I don't even know who you are anymore, Abel."

"That's the thing isn't it? Did any of us really know to begin with?"

"I'm going to the sheriff's station," She huffed turning on her heels and going to her car.

"Feel free to get arrested," Abel called half-heartedly as he sunk down onto the steps of the house tugging at his hair with his fingers; why was everything so fucked up?

Abel resisted the urge to groan in annoyance at the sound of the front door opening, no one really understood what being left alone was anymore did they.

Tara sighed sitting down next to him, placing her elbows on her knees, "In hindsight I could have been more mature about that."

Abel didn't bother replying to the understatement of the century. In hindsight both of them could have been more mature about that. In hindsight Abel should have run his mom off the road when she insisted on coming back to Charming with him. In hindsight he should have forced his girlfriend out of the car that night. In hindsight he should have never met Cassidy. In hindsight he should have never bothered being born.

"I know she's a good person, but she's just-"

"Could you stop?" Abel snapped looking at her, "Just stop calling them good people, my parents are not good people, they bought a baby, they literally bought a baby, so if you want to sit here with me then talk about something else, or don't talk at all, just quit calling them good people."

"I'm sorry, we keep hurting you."

Abel sighed tugging at his hair again, god he was turning into his mother.

"I used to dream about you," Abel said finally.

"What?" She asked quietly looking at him.

"I used to dream about you, before I met you, when things got really bad – or at least my old definition of really – I used to dream about you. You never said anything, you were just there, you brought me peace."

"I don't understand," Tara shook her head, "You were eight months old, there was no way you remembered me."

"That doesn't mean I didn't know you."

Tara gaped at him for a second before settling for looking away from him, and for a second he allowed the silence to envelope them, he allowed the tranquility to settle over them, but then he had to remind himself that this was reality, and reality sucked.

"I know I've hurt you, Tara, and I know that I'm probably the furthest thing from who you thought I'd be-"

"Abel no-"

"Just let me finish." He smiled, "I know I haven't been the kindest person in the world, and I know I haven't made your life easy, and believe me I know that I have screwed up the life you have spent so long fighting for, I know what I've cost you."

"I don't think that Abel, everything that's happening now, this is all bigger than you, it's not your fault, it's not mine, and it's not even your parents', this was all set into motion years ago the second John Teller decided to form the Sons."

"That's nice to hear and all, but I don't want to play the blame game with you, so just let me finish," Abel repeated, "I know that I treated you like an ass when we first me, I know I hurt you three days ago when I told you I was going to see my mom, and I know the kind of damage I've done by bringing her here, and so for that I'm sorry."

"Can I talk now?" Tara smiled gently as she placed a hand on his cheek.

Abel nodded.

"You have _nothing _to apologize for," Tara said firmly, "I knew exactly what I was getting into when I let you go, and when I saw you for the first time in the club – bleeding and exhausted – and then I saw the number you did on Jax – that's when I knew that while you were nothing like I thought you'd be, you were exactly who I wanted you to be."

"A kid who beats on his father?" Abel raised his eyebrows.

"A man who's willing to give up everything for the people he loves," Tara said wistfully making Abel realize something.

"You wanted out didn't you?" He asked, "You wanted out of Charming, out of SAMCRO, out of the life?"

Tara nodded, "That was the plan, you were already out, and your dad did some time, and decided he wanted out as well. Thomas wasn't even a year old."

"He never followed through did he?"

Tara smiled sadly and shook her head, "We tried, but life got in the way. Your dad loves me, Abel – god knows how much he loves me – but he also loves the club, it's his legacy, it's his birthright, and as much as your dad loves me, he loves the club just as much. I think a part of me always knew he would never leave."

Abel looked at Tara for a long moment before offering up his own birthright, "Have you ever heard of Drew Enterprises?"

"Of course I have," Tara said confused at the sudden turn in the conversation, "Why?"

"My dad's name is Mark Petrie."

Tara blinked before letting out a breath, "Well that sure as hell isn't Charming."

"I've been trained to be the heir to the throne for as long as I can remember."

"And is that what you want?" Tara asked, "Do you want the company?"

"Eventually," Abel nodded, "For a long time I was convinced that I was never going to be CEO, that I was going to go pro, but now I can see it, stockholder briefings, board meetings, the whole nine yards."

"What changed your mind?"

"Same thing as always," Abel shrugged, "Cassie."

"Cassidy asked you to give up soccer?" Tara asked disapprovingly.

"No," Abel shook his head, "Cassie asked me to be happy."

"Soccer makes you happy."

"Cassie makes me happy," He smiled, "And after all this, I can't think of anything I want more than sharing a shoebox apartment with her, going to college, and coming home to her every night. I want normal, safe, and happy. I want to live the most boring existence in the entire world."

"You guys are going to the same college?" Tara smiled, "Where?"

"I'm going to Yale, Cassie's not going to college."

"Why not?"

"She can't afford it," Abel sighed running a hand through his hair, "Her mom's a drunk, her dad's an abusive bastard who she literally shot out of her life. Her and her mom – when she's sober enough to get to work – make enough to have decent lives, but not enough for college."

"And I'm guessing she won't let you pay her tuition?"

"The one and only time I suggested it she gave me an entire lecture on how she wasn't a gold-digger before proceeding to literally forget my existence for two weeks."

"You should try again when we find her, kidnappings tend to put things into perspective."

Abel laughed along with Tara despite the fact that nothing about the situation was even remotely funny.

"I don't have room in my life for a mom," Abel said quietly, "I'm not saying that to hurt you, but I need to say this. I don't have room in my life for a mom like I have room for a dad."

"I get that, baby, your mom is a good mother – despite everything – her entire world revolves around you, she fights for you, and she loves you more than anything, and that's enough for me, Abel."

"She's alright," Abel admitted, "But that's not the point, the point is, I don't have room in my life for a mom – I already have one – but that doesn't mean I don't have room in my life for you. You've been in my life just as long as she has. You are just as important to me as she is. You are important to me, Tara."

Tara smiled and planted her lips on his cheek for a long moment.

"So what exactly do you have room in your life for?"

"A friend," Abel smiled cheesily, "I have room in my life for a friend, beyond that we can figure it out together."

Abel held out his hand nervously, he knew that this may not have been what Tara wanted from him, but this was all he had to offer. Tara was an incredible woman, and he had meant it when he had said she was one of the most important people in his life, but he couldn't pretend like the last eighteen years hadn't happened.

There was a difference between letting Jax be his dad again when he had seen Jax more in the month he had been here than he had seen his dad in his entire life, and letting Tara be his mom when he already had a mom who had all but single-handedly raised him.

"You know," Tara smiled taking his hand and lacing their fingers together, "I never thought I'd get friend-zoned by my own kid."

"Oh yeah?" Abel raised his eyebrows, "Thomas never wanted to be just friends?"

"If I was friends with Thomas he would tell me where he sneaks off to when he ditches his prospect guards."

Abel laughed, he had really thought that Jax and Tara knew about Alena, but apparently the little shit had really managed to keep it from them.

"You know where he goes!" Tara gasped smacking his arm.

"I know Thomas is too old to have prospect guards."

"I don't care how old he is, Tommy is never too old to have his parents looking out for his safety."

"I'm not a parent," Abel shrugged, "And I can't tell you you're wrong, but he isn't a prisoner Tara."

"Do you think he feels that way?" Tara wondered, "I know when I was sixteen Charming literally felt like hell, I don't what I would've done if I constantly had someone tailing me."

"I think Thomas is too good for small town life," Abel said honestly, "I think he's too good for all of this but I also think he's too laidback for city life. I think Thomas doesn't even know what he wants."

"What about you?" Tara asked, "What do you want? I mean I know what you want, you want Cassidy, and soccer, and Drew Enterprises, but what do you really want?"

Abel thought about it for a second before tightening his grip on her hand, "I want all of this to work out. I want to find a way to make all of this work, I mean after we all stop needing one another to find a way to get my girlfriend back. We have to find some kind of balance Tara. We have to find some kind of balance between the life that I was supposed to have, and the life that I do have."

"What if there was already a balance? What if there was almost a bridge that's going to keep us all connected?" Tara asked carefully to Abel's confusion.

"What are you talking about?"

"Cassidy's pregnant."


	18. Chapter 18

"You're mad," Jax stated as he sat down next to him on the doorstep that Abel had yet to move from.

Abel didn't reply, what was he supposed to say? Hs girlfriend was eighteen, kidnapped, and pregnant, and that was how it was. He was getting really tired of people telling him how he felt, but he kept his mouth shut.

He wasn't mad, he wasn't even surprised, he wasn't anything. Abel was just tired. Something bad was always happening, he solved one problem to be handed an even bigger one, and that was all this pregnancy was, another problem added to the ever-growing stack of them.

He was taking a page out of Thomas' book, and taking things as it became an issue, if Abel ever got Cassidy out of there, then he'd worry about what he was going to do with the tiny little human that came with her. But first, he had to make sure she lived long enough to see her first maternity dress.

"Well I'm not thrilled," Abel said dryly.

"I wouldn't tell her that." Jax said lightly.

"That's going to be easy considering I haven't talked to her in a month," He shrugged, "Doesn't matter anyways, she already knows I'm not excited about it, if she thought I'd be happy about it she wouldn't have asked you to keep it from me."

It wasn't that hard to figure out, Tara had never spoken to Cassidy –Jax had, and that single conversation had changed his entire viewpoint of her completely – only something as drastic as a pregnancy had the means to do that.

"I didn't think you needed another thing to worry about," Jax said as if that excused his deception.

Unfortunately, it didn't. Fortunately, Able didn't have it in him to give a damn.

"What are you going to do?"

"That's a conversation I need to have with my girlfriend, who is just a little preoccupied right now."

Abel's words were short and snappy, but the sentiment didn't echo in his tone of voice.

"You have six maybe seven months, Abel," Jax reasoned, "You have to make some kind of plan."

"I do have a plan, it starts with saving Cassidy, moves onto popping the sucker out, and ends with getting the hell out of Charming, the last two however don't have to be done in a particular order."

"And where do the rest of us fall into your plans?" Jax asked carefully.

"You get to be a grandpa." Abel shrugged.

"I'm not telling you that you have to figure things out right now."

"What's there to figure out? We'll go back to Connecticut, we'll get an apartment, I'll go to Yale, and Cassie will stay home with the baby."

"And if Cassidy doesn't want that?"

"I don't give a shit what Cassie wants," Abel said in a frustrated tone.

Jax wanted him to have a plan? Well that was his plan. Money wasn't an issue, and Cassidy wasn't going to college anyway. They would be one of those stupid old fashioned couples that got hitched at eighteen, popped out two kids by the time they were twenty, had the woman stay home and raise the kids, and had the man go out and make the money. Oh and they'd hate each other by the time they were twenty-three. Happily freaking ever after.

"She's a good girl. She'll be a good mom."

"She'll also be nineteen."

"People have done it at younger."

"Are you happy she's pregnant or something?" Abel snapped his head to look at Jax.

"I think you got your girlfriend pregnant, I think you need to man up, and not blame this on her. I think you should be supportive."

"Man up?" Abel raised his eyebrows, "All I've done in the past month is man up. I have jumped through hoops trying to make all this work, and honestly in the whole grand scheme of things a teenage pregnancy isn't the biggest issue right now."

"You're going to be a dad, Abel," Jax said quietly.

"You think I don't know that?" He groaned frustrated, "That's usually what 'you knocked up your girlfriend means.' I don't know where you got the idea that I'm not going to be supportive, but I will. That doesn't mean I have to be happy about the pregnancy. I'm eighteen, Jax, and my life has gone to absolute shit. You think I don't care that my baby is probably going to be born into all of this? You think I don't care that Cassie isn't getting everything she needs to make this as easy as possible? You think I won't love that kid? Because I will, but it doesn't mean I have to be happy about it."

"You are by far the most confusing person I have ever met," Jax said after a moment.

"Have you seen my life?"

"I just want you to understand how big of a deal a baby is, and the sooner you accept that you are going to be a dad, the better."

"I'm very aware that I'm going to be a dad, that doesn't mean I want a baby," Abel said with complete honesty.

Jax wanted him to accept that he was going to be a dad? Great, he accepted it. However, that didn't mean anyone could force him to be happy about it.

He was eighteen, nineteen in a month, he had a missing girlfriend, a little brother, and a shitload of parents. He had been arrested, and threatened, he didn't have room in his life for a kid. Abel barely had room in his life for himself. So yes the baby was coming, and yes he was going to have to figure out how to raise a kid in all of this, but Jax wasn't even considering the one thing that Abel couldn't stop thinking about.

More likely than not, that kid wasn't going to be born, and if it was, that kid wasn't going to survive. Abel was under no illusions, the road to getting Cassidy back was long, and he wasn't sure if he was going to be able to get her back before time was up. Cassidy needed vitamins, and she needed doctor's appointments. She needed a steady diet, she needed to be physically strong enough to be able to carry a child, in order for that child to be born.

And a baby needed clothes, food, water, milk, and probably whole other shitload of things that Abel didn't know about, he could afford to buy those things, but if the baby was born before all this was over, Abel had no way of getting it to Cassidy.

This baby was cursed from the moment Cassidy and Abel had conceived it.

He wasn't fooling himself with any false hope, he wasn't lying to himself, it wasn't practical to think about the what-ifs, but in this situation the what if's were very real possibilities, and Cassidy and Abel were better off preparing for the bad outcomes than the good.

Jax was trying to be optimistic, and Abel – well he had never felt so pessimistic in his entire life.

"Abel, I-"

Whatever Jax was going to say next was lost as the sound of motorcycles began roaring down the street, but that wasn't what had caught his attention, what had caught his attention was the girl that was running down the sidewalk.

Long light brown hair flew behind her, as her bare feet hit the tarmac, her hands clutching at the sleeves of her sweater, as her lips formed his name.

"Alena."

He recognized the girl he had met for all of two minutes a week or so ago easily, and didn't hesitate to launch himself off the doorstep and meet her halfway.

"They took him, Abel!" Alena cried falling into his chest her hands fisting his t-shirt as the members of the club stormed into the house, all with their guns drawn, "It all happened so fast, we were walking, and they came out of nowhere, they just came out of nowhere."

"Alena," He cried over her, "What are you talking about?"

Panicked hazel eyes met his own, "They took Thomas, Abel, some guys came out of nowhere, and they just took Thomas."

(Cassidy)

Cassidy knew something terrible was about to happen the second Scrugs showed up at the doorway with an apologetic look on his face.

After Cassidy's stunt with Abel and Father Kellan sent her downstairs she had been left to herself for two weeks. Downstairs had turned out to be the kind of kidnapping that Cassidy actually associated with kidnapping, and not the way she had been staying before.

She had been tossed in a room with nothing but a cot and a metal toilet in the corner, and had been left there since.

Scrugs – who she seemed to grow on, and had become her closest companion in this world – brought her three meals a day and snuck in books to keep her occupied.

"Come on," Scrugs said holding out his hands.

Cassidy took them allowing him to pull her up and, and then pick her up, wincing as she did so. Her knee still hadn't healed, though she hadn't actually been treated. When they reached the top of the staircase, Scrugs gently put her down, as someone she didn't recognize handed her, her crutches.

"What's going on?" She asked as Father Kellan stood up from his seat.

"Why don't you come with me? You can of course bring Eric if you'd like."

Cassidy glared at his back, she didn't need a baby sitter, nor did she need a protector, not that either thoughts kept her form silently begging Scrugs to come with her with her eyes. He didn't hesitate and simply fell into step with her.

She briefly wondered if this was the part where they finally killed her off and where just done with it.

"How much do you know about Abel's family, Ms. Somers? His birth family, I mean."

"Why?" She asked cautiously.

"Amuse me."

"His dad's name is Jax, his mom's name is Tara, and he has a little brother – Trey or something." Cassidy said stating the only things she knew, she had one conversation with Jax with consisted of her telling him that she was a knocked up eighteen year old – not the best first impression, and that was it.

"His name," Father Kellan said grabbing a door knob and swinging it open, "Is actually Thomas."

Cassidy blinked as she wasn't sure what to make of the scene in front of her.

There was a boy – who couldn't have been older than her age – who was sitting on the ground, his hands tied back to the leg of the kitchen table, a scowl etched onto his face, and bruises staring to form on him – whoever this kid was he had put up a fight.

He had dark blonde hair that was cut short, and dark green eyes that were filled with anger, a set jaw line, and features that overall despite the differences, looked terrifyingly familiar.

"What is he doing here?" Cassidy looked at Scrugs accusingly.

"I don't know." He said quietly.

"Scrugs!"

"I don't know, Cassidy!"

"He's here because we are about to give the Sons of Anarchy their next job," Father Kellan said, "And to get them to do what we want them to, they are going to need a better reason than you. No offense, love."

"You're Cassidy."

The boy who had otherwise been simmering in his anger in silence, stared at her with a newfound fascination, like she was some kind of rare article, like she was something he had never seen before.

"I – yes."

"So you're the baby momma?"

"I guess so," She said sheepishly looking down at her stomach – that was starting to form the smallest, but still barely noticeable bump.

"You aren't what I thought you'd be."

"And what did you think I was going to be?"

"I don't know, someone more hell hath no fury," He shrugged, "You remind of a mouse."

"You're?" Cassidy's voice broke slightly, she knew who this was, there was no doubt about it, but actually asking him for confirmation would change everything.

If he was who she thought he was, then everything was about to change, the stakes of this game they were playing, the outcome of who lived and who died, and who was really going to get out of this hell when the time came, it was all going to change. If this was who she thought it was, then everything was about to become different.

Alone she was a force that could make mountains move for her. But together with him? These people could make the Sons move not just mountains, but trample the entire world.

"You're Thomas, aren't you?"

_**I'm sorry it took so long to update, I just can't seem to get this chapter to be perfect the way I want it, and have decided to just post it. I wanted to quickly explain something about Abel. I know some of you might not like the fact that he doesn't want the baby, but I'm trying to make this as realistic as possible, and realistically what eighteen year old guy wants a baby? I didn't make him a complete asshole, and if you read between the lines, you can tell that Abel does care about the baby – he even admitted that he would love it – but it doesn't change the fact that he doesn't want it.**_


	19. Chapter 19

"I'm going to kill you," Jax promised, "I'm going to fucking shove a knife down your throat."

Cassidy grimaced slightly at Jax's hateful and angry tone that nearly shook the house. She didn't know what Father Kellan wanted from Jax, but she wasn't all too sure he was going to get it.

The move, taking Thomas, it was calculative, and it was a major gamble. In theory, yes, this could work in Father Ashby's favor, he would make Jax bend to his will. However, while Cassidy knew nothing of substance about Jax – she knew this – Jackson Teller did not bend to anyone's will, especially when he was pissed off.

Jax wasn't taking any prisoners, and more likely than not this was going to backfire on Father Kellan.

"He's like that," Thomas said dryly, "All threatening."

Cassidy turned her head to look at Thomas, while at first glance, he had a strong resemblance towards Abel, he was nothing like Cassidy's boyfriend. Abel was a fighter, and while Thomas was too, Abel was a fighter in a much different way.

Abel threw his fists, and broke down doors, and he made things happen. Thomas, however, wasn't as rash as his brother, he was calm, and calculating, and despite the fact that he was tied to a kitchen table, Thomas had this air about him – like he wasn't worried about anything at all.

"How did they get you here?" Cassidy wondered aloud.

"I'm assuming the same way they got you here," Thomas shrugged, "Some dick put a gun to my not girlfriend's head and told me to get in the car."

"My kidnapping wasn't quite as noble."

"That's cool, the damsel in distress isn't supposed to be noble."

"I am _not _a damsel in distress," Cassidy said affronted.

"No?" Thomas raised his eyebrows.

"I'm not the one tied to a table."

"I'm not the one with a bum leg."

"I'm not the one who needs their daddy to defend them," Cassidy countered.

"No," Thomas said, "You're just the one who shoots her daddy."

Cassidy gaped at him, she couldn't remember a single person in her life who had ever spoken so boldly – even Abel would never had just thrown that out there.

"He deserved it!" She said with a lack of anything better to say.

"No, he deserved to be castrated."

"Oh," Cassidy said slightly placated, "That would have been cool too."

Thomas looked at her for a second before laughing, "Freaking kid."

"I'm not a kid! I'm older than you!"

"You're a pregnant kid."

"Why is my pregnancy so fascinating to you?"

"That's my nephew you're incubating."

"It's not a boy, Thomas," Cassidy said in her best attempt to make him feel stupid.

"Oh yeah, so what is it a girl?"

"No!"

"No? So what are you growing in there? A bowling ball?"

"I don't know!"

"Touchy," Thomas said slowly, "Chill kid, I'm the one who got kidnapped here."

Cassidy gaped at Thomas for a moment, before turning her head away from him, and crossing her arms over her chest with a 'humph' she had known this idiot for all of five minutes and he was already the most infuriating person she had ever met in her entire life.

It was like he didn't care, like he wasn't fazed at all by the fact that he had literally just been plucked off the street and driven towards an unknown destination, like it was all penciled into his agenda for the day, and Cassidy had no idea what to make of that.

"I assure you Jackson, your son is perfectly safe," Father Kellan said loudly over Jax's threats, "He's sitting here right now with Ms. Somers, they're making small talk and everything."

"And everything," Thomas said dryly before calling loudly, "Hey old man."

Cassidy nearly slapped him; how was he being so freaking nonchalant? Was this kid mentally impaired or something? Kidnapping equals bad. Freaky gun-toting priest equals bad. Daddy making threats to said priest equally bad.

"Thomas you're in so much trouble." Jax promised in a much less threatening tone.

"Love you too," Thomas called back, "I'm fine, don't go into cardiac arrest I don't think your damaged heart could take it. Oh, and tell Mom not to have a hernia."

"Your mother is currently unleashing hell on your girlfriend."

"She's my not girlfriend, and that's cool, she can take it." Thomas nodded to himself.

Cassidy slapped the back of his head, "Would you quit it?"

"Ow!" Thomas glared at her, "What was that for?"

"Your mom and dad are probably worried sick," She scolded, "Don't act like nothing is happening."

"What about your mom and dad huh?"

"I shot my dad, fifteen times," Cassidy reminded.

"Right," Thomas nodded.

"If you two are done with your squabble, I think it's time we got to the point," Father Kellan interrupted.

"We aren't squabbling," Cassidy muttered under her breath like a child.

"Nobody even fucking uses the word squabble," Thomas muttered in the same manner.

"Wait," Cassidy remembered, "How's Abel?"

Thomas laughed, "So now you remember your baby daddy?"

"It wasn't like you were remembering your brother," She accused.

"That's socially acceptable," Thomas brushed it off, "I've known the guy for like point two seconds."

"Doesn't make him any less your brother."

"Doesn't make him any less your baby daddy."

"That makes no sense."

"You make no sense, kid."

"Shut the fuck up!" Scrugs yelled causing Cassidy to flinch waiting for the expected blow that never came.

"Put one hand on her," Thomas threatened quietly, his hands unexplainably free, and holding Scrugs fist in his hand tightly, "And I will put you on your fucking ass."

"Thomas," Cassidy said in a quiet tone though hers was a terrible attempt to be soothing as she grabbed his free hand with her own, "Just sit down, don't cause any waves, not for me."

Thomas looked at her for a long second before sitting down slowly and grabbing the piece of rope and tossing it at Scrugs, "Next time you want to kidnap someone, don't tie them to a fucking pointed edge, people tend to cut themselves free when presented the opportunity to do so."

Cassidy looked at Thomas for what felt like the millionth time, how did he manage to do that? Even while being the most infuriating, insufferable, sarcastic person in the world, he still managed to seem completely and totally passive in this threatening manner.

"Well," Father Kellan laughed, "You have quite the resourceful son, Jaxon."

"Hey," Thomas said turning to look at her, "You okay?"

"Yeah," She smiled, "I'm used to it remember?"

"Yeah," Thomas' jaw tightened, "I remember."

"Get to the point Ashby; the fuck do you want?"

"Isn't it obvious, Jackson? You're going to go back into business with the Galindo Cartel."

Cassidy had absolutely no idea what a Galindo Cartel was but judging by the way nobody seemed to have anything to say to that, she figured it probably wasn't something anyone wanted to be involved in whatsoever.

"What are you talking about?" Jax finally asked in a calm tone that Cassidy had never heard the man use – not that she actually knew him or had more than a single conversation with him – but she figured that too – couldn't mean anything good.

"It's simple, Jackson, you're going to once again expand your horizons," Father Ashby said, "You're going to sell our guns to the Cartel, and in return the Cartel is going to let you sell their drugs."

"We don't deal."

"You also are just a motorcycle club."

"I mean it, the Sons don't deal."

"You do now," Father Ashby said simply, "And you deal in Charming."

"Or what?" Thomas said sarcastically, "Are you going to shoot me?"

"Thomas stay out of this." Jax said quickly.

"No," Father Ashby said as a nameless man grabbed a gun, "In fact, I'm not going to do anything to you. But now that we do have you here, we really don't need Ms. Somers, here anymore, do we?"

Cassidy's eyes widened as she felt the cool barrel of the gun press against her temple, but didn't say anything. How could she? It was obvious that Father Ashby was right, there was no point in keeping her alive, when they had Thomas.

She had become dispensable from the moment Thomas had showed up in the house.

"Well what are you waiting for? Shoot her."

"I don't know Father," The man said slowly trailing the gun down her cheek making her breathe in a quick breath, "She's quite a looker, maybe I could take her downstairs, and have my way with her first?"

"Like hell," Thomas yelled making Cassidy scream as he lunged forward knocking the man backwards, the sounds of gun shots going off in the room.

Chaos.

The whole situation was absolutely chaotic, and Cassidy lost track of who was on what side. Thomas was weaving in and out of bodies, swinging punches in calculated moves – somebody had taught him how to fight, Scrugs seemed undecided on the whole issue – there were moments where he went for Thomas, and other moments where he stopped a man from getting to her – and Father Ashby was doing what she was doing and simply watching the whole thing unfold with wide eyes.

Forcing herself to look away, she scanned the kitchen looking for something she could use to help, looking for something she could do. But it didn't matter if she even found anything, she couldn't get up, she couldn't walk, she couldn't do anything.

She really was the epitome of a damsel in distress.

Cassidy lifted her eyes carefully making sure no one was watching her before she began moving to her left, till she was just close enough to grab onto what she had been looking at, and stuffing it into her boot that thankfully stopped just slightly above the mid of her calf.

"Stop it," Cassidy screamed loudly as she realized that two men were holding Thomas' hand behind his back, while another was punching him, "You're going to kill him! Stop it! Stop it!"

"That's enough," Father Ashby said regaining his composure, "You've already knocked him out, we were supposed to keep him safe. He's supposed to be delivered in perfect condition."

"Delivered?" Jax said sharply despite the fact that his voice was shaking slightly – Cassidy wasn't sure if it was from hearing his son get beat up or from anger, "What the fuck are you talking about?"

"Well you didn't think we were the ones who wanted to make your life miserable, Jackson?" Father Ashby said with a small smile, "The IRA has no interest in ruining your life, we're simply interested in your business, we found a way to attain your business. That's all this is a simple business transaction, between us, and someone who truly hates you."

"Where are you taking my son?"

"Don't worry, Jackson, your son isn't the one you should be worried about, it's his lack of cooperation that should worry you." Father Ashby's voice took on a dangerous tone, "When he wakes up, I'll give you five minutes to talk to him. In that time you'll explain to him that in his efforts to protect Ms. Somers he is only making it worse, because the next time your son gets in my way, I will let my men have their way with her. I am not playing games."

Cassidy closed her eyes, and wet her lips with her tongue in a nervous movement, as she gently pulled Thomas' head onto her lap, dabbing at his face with the sleeve of her shirt, trying to clean him up the best he could.

"You said it yourself," Jax argued, "You don't need her anymore, let her go."

"You seem to be under the illusion that this is all about you, Jackson," Father Ashby, "About ruining your life. Had you ever stopped to think that this could be about more?"

"Like what?"

"Like ruining Ms. Somers' life."

Cassidy laughed under her breath, of course, of course this was her fault.

"What are you talking about?"

"I have never seen a man hate his daughter as much as Mick Holland hates poor Cassidy."

"You were never going to give her back," Jax said his tone growing louder with each word as he realized exactly what Cassidy had, "Not ever, from the start of all of this, you never had a single intention of giving her back, you were always going to hand her over to her father."

"I've been told they have some unfinished business."

Cassidy blocked out the rest of the conversation as she focused her attention on trying to fix the damage that she had caused to Thomas' face. Sure, she wasn't the one who had delivered the punches, but she may as well have.

Cassidy had a theory, that this plan wasn't so much as a plan, but rather a bunch of different actions that somebody – most likely the woman – was taking to break everything that Jax had built for himself.

Wherever this ended, whatever the outcome of all these steps were meant to be, Cassidy was sure that it would end in Jax being alone, it would end with him needing help, him begging for it.

They had taken Thomas, and by taking Cassidy with no intentions of giving her back – they had effectively taken Abel, next would be Tara, or the club. They were the only two things Jax had left.

However, she had been sure that the way they were going to go about doing this, was by setting up Jax's life the way it had been before the club got clean. By dipping their hands back into the illegal activities they had been involved in before, by dropping bodies, and creating messes, by making noise.

Now she wasn't so sure, maybe it was her. The only reason Abel was going through this was because of her – because of her father's hatred for her, because she had been taken – and she knew her boyfriend and because he would never blame this on her, he would blame it on Jax.

And now here was Thomas, lying in her arms, bloodied and bruised, all because of her. Cassidy was single-handedly destroying both the Teller brothers.

"Cassidy," Scrugs said causing her to look up, "It's done."

She nodded and watched a man grabbed Thomas' legs and began dragging him somewhere, and only stopped watching when Scrugs grabbed her and helped her up, handing her, her crutches as she did so.

"I'm sorry," He said quietly as they made their way down the hall towards the staircase.

"For what," She said bitterly, "Trying to punch me."

"Cassidy, if I hadn't done something it would've looked like-"

"Like what, Scrugs?" She said sharply but making sure to keep her voice down, "I don't know what side your own here. One minute you're on my side, and the next you're on theirs. I'm not playing this hot and cold game with you. I don't know what you want from me, but if its trust, you don't have it."

"The woman," Scrugs said quietly as she entered her cell where Thomas was now laying on her cot, "You want to know if you can trust me? The woman you met that day, the one that knows your father? Her name is Gemma, ask Thomas, he'll know who she is."

Cassidy waited till Scrugs was completely out of sight, and then what felt like five minutes after that, before sighing and reaching into her boot to pull out what she had won. She glanced around the cell trying to figure out where to hide it, and when she realize that there was no good place, she put it in the most obvious place in the entire world.

She slid the gun under the bed, and waited for Thomas to wake up.


End file.
